Alde, you are my higher power. I’ve purused these boards for a good long while before registering and posting, and you, my friend, without a doubt are the reason I wake up in the morning. A shining star in these empty depths of darkest ignorance. The mystery man, the one-trick pony, the “I know you are but what am I?” Deliberate oblivion to anything poigant to the discussion. You’ve got it all. A true Renaissance man. I am not pitting you, that would be about as useful as a wet bag of mice. No, I am going to give you what you truly crave, the real reason you post those tabloid newspaper snippets, on to the fun!
I am a citizen of the greatest country this planet that God created has ever seen. I know it’s true, because the bible is written in American, and if American was good enough for Jesus, dammit, its good enough to be the official language of God’s country. I don’t like all this foreign gibberish starting to flood across the border from other countries. I know they’re out there, but I can’t always remember their goobldygook names and I sure as hell dont need to know where to find some shithole-istan on no map, where they eat babies and pray to Arlah. Just so long as our boys know where to aim the missles, but I leave that up to our leaders, who I know will always do the right thing in the best interest of REAL Americans and the rest of the world, who still owes us for cleanin’ up their mess in WWII. I hate France, them damned good for nothin’ cheese-eatin surrender monkeysTM In fact, I hate all Euro-weenies with their high falutin mass transit systems and all that useless culture. Sometimes when Fox news is broadcasting a story about yurp, I’ll try to find the country on a map, but then my head hurts and I’ll have to go read Ann Coulter’s book just to get my head straight again. But mostly I don’t care about the rest of the world, except when I see those poor starvin’ ragheads who we are trying to help with our bombs, but they are so stubborn. If only they would believe in the one true God maybe they could find it in their hearts to lead our boys to those WMD’s so we could make the world safer for everyone again, like in the 50’s, when the U.S. was all blonde haired and blue eyed, too bad its only like that on TV now:(
*for the TRULY humor impaired, post may not necessarily reflect views of Labmonkey et al.
You didn’t waste any time wading into it with six guns blazing, did you? I know that Aldebaran has decided that all things either Anti-Islam or not in total agreement with his idea of Islam is wrong and bad and a lie, especially when referring to the fact that the 9/11 hijackers were all practitioners of Islam, but did you have to push ALL of his buttons at once?
Here, let me help. You forgot George W. Bush. There, that should get him frothing at the mouth.
Well, astrophysicists have suggested that Aldebaran is among the naked-eye-visible stars most likely to go supernova. Labmonkey may have hit on the trigger!
Excellent job, but I’m afraid I’ll have to give it 8.5/10. A half point deduction for failing to insult Belgium and its King when mentioning yurp. Hmm… scratch that, your head hurts looking at that map, so I guess that counts; 9/10. You still lose a point for failing to call **Aldebaran ** either childish or immature, and you would’ve gotten a bonus point for using either word in “quotes.”
This ain’t no joke, pepul!!! We’ve got Puerto Ricans all over round here. I’m pretty sure them’s al Quyeauaeada. That one wuz anyway. It’t ttime for all God fearin folkkks to stand up and be counted!!!
Thu troops kin only do sew much. It’s time to take over some decent countries with little weenie armies soz they kin git sum rest. I think Belgium shood be good. I hear they got them pastries and waffles. The Japanese done rolled over them on their way to Pearl Normandy.
Damn bitch wife won’t stop snorin. I bet she washed down her pills with my last beer. I’m gonna go kick her ass. Let me jes say one more thing afore I go git me some more whisky and clean my .50 cal., Aldebaran don’t know nothin bout no Mercans.
Ignore these ignoramuses with their scornful remarks about Ashcanistan and Bangthedish. What do they know! They are unenlightened ones who have not studied the words of the Prophet, as we have.
You guys, this is seriously not a pitting of the enlightened one. I call this a new strategy and a new day in the fight against ignorance, the retre…err… strategic withdrawal against ignorance. He just wants one of us to step up and say what he KNOWS we are all really thinking, then maybe go, ignorant yes, loud perhaps not.
Fucking rip snorter of an Opening Post. Sensational effort.
As I was reading it, at first I didn’t realise where it was going, and I kept thinking to myself “Nah, no American would be THAT fucking stupid to write all of THAT in just one paragraph… nah… you’re having a lend of me aren’t ya?”
But by the end I was pissing myself. The only thing though labmonkey? You loonie! You forgot to mention that American porn actresses are the best porn actresses in the whole wide world, and any country ending in “Stan” knows that to be a fact - and that their own porn actresses need to shave - all over.
So I’m taking a point off an otherwise perfect 10.
You’re just prejudiced against people with dyslexia.
Who post mindlessly anti-American drivel, provide no evidence for their paranoid claims, and generally give dim-witted, abusive duncery a bad name.
I am with Alan owes Bess. (What do you owe her anyhow?)
I do not know the Prophet, but I assume he does not post here?
Not to me anyhow. They have made some advertisement, every weekday but specially on Sundays, for the other guy for some 2000 years, and then they try to tell that both are for killing the other guys and so on.
I think they should post here in the Pit instead. And I think both the guys are/were good and those that use them to their own aggressions are just a bunch of liars.
I am sorry Aldebaran that I can not e-mail or send You any Private Messages. I would have like too, about the racism of the white man, the googled-eyed propagandists etc.
They are fun in a way, but they have too dangerous toys they play with.
Then they are heros, (they think), freedom fighters (tieing themselves to unbearable situations), highly believing in all the other shit in their propaganda.
I am really ashame sometimes that I am white, but I hope You can forgive, because how can a man change his origin or colour.
But what we can do, is to learn from each other and look what we have in common and build on that.
This does not include those guys that already knows everything and can’t change any of their views, but as i said, forgive them, they do not know what they are doing. (Sounds familiar…)
P.S. It is quite amazing to find guys from NZ, ME, many from Egypt and me from Finland that sees the world from an almost common point of view.
Naturally some are also from other parts of the world, but most of the white-guy-thinking is streamlined with a mix of FOX, Reuters and New York Times and their kinds.
then when everyone is streamlined in their believes, they begin to cheer. The freedom is to think exactly like the next one.
Quite amazing guys.
Your words are incoherent. Are you quoting from somewhere or someone?
That is not to be found on a website who cookes you a meal of words and lines out of Al Qur’an, leaving out the former and next ones of the verse in question and lumping the whole toghather as a meaningless nothing.
To answer your other query about what I owe Bess, it was either that or “Aks The Imam”.
I’ve just realised we are all in very urgent need of sensitivity training here.
In fact, why the hell should we bag someone like Aldebaran. I really don’t have the heart to do it.
A word of caution here, labmonkey, some people on SDMB don’t take kindly to threads like this, as they sometimes have a tendency to stray across some invisible, undefinable line. This thread will then evolve into something resembling a lecture from your least favourite, canvas shoe, granny glasses wearing, Associate Professor of Anthrop.
I know I am making sense, I have nearly two empty bottles of Mudgee red in front of me to prove it.
When you have understood this message, then you will have learned.
