Please pause your initial judgements.
As I was diligently working on an assignment, I somehow ended up researching the etymology of various (explicit) words. This research was completely irrelevant to my assignment (the standardization of development measures for policy practice, in case you were curious, although I am sure you were not).
What I discovered is that by certain contexts and understandings, I am a pedophile.
Pedo- in particular Latin etymologies means “to fart.” (Reference: Etymology 2 of pedo - Wiktionary, the free dictionary)
-phile means a love or affinity of something.
So, by deductive logic…
I love to fart…I am a pedophile.
Let me break this down into an equation:
If x = to fart, y = love, and awesome = Me
(x + y) = awesome
Actually…we should probably square (x + y) based on my exponential love of farting.
So…I believe that makes me a super-pedophile.
My questions are:
- Do I need to report this to anyone? Or, at the very least, hang signs at my residence to deter trick-or-treaters?
- Could I justifiably get a cape to acknowledge my super-pedophile status?
Many thanks!
-Awesome