Moral codes are not just about the big ticket items in life.
You can’t have it both ways- either it’s a small deal so help your wife, simply because she asked. Or, you find this guys behavior so annoying and you want to take a stand on the issue,. You then have to decide if the stand is more important than helping out your wife. It might just be- and that’s what you have to decide. That’s where the question of personal values come in.
:smack:
Pizza is delivered to the church all the time…
You are being a bit of a jerk, although I can relate to your annoyance. The bottom line is that your wife committed to getting the pizza; now that she can’t it is up to her to still make it happen.
And really, it is just one hour out of the weekend. You still can’t squeeze in a hike or a movie with the kids? Spend the pizza-fetching hour talking with them or playing some road game.
And with wife’s iffy schedules, in the future she should be less inclined to volunteer for such duties.
(FWIW, I would have the same feelings you are having, but then I’d feel silly about them and Just Do It)
mmm
what ever happened to delivery pizza places that have D.E.L.IV.E.R.Y pizza d.r.i.ve.r.s??
She messaged someone who will be at the meeting and asked them to run and get the pizza, and they agreed. She messaged the minister and told him to give the person the details about when/where to pick up the pizza.
Just makes more sense for someone who is attending the meeting to get the food, especially with 24 hours notice.
I really don’t get all the “you love her right? THEN WHY AREN’T YOU DOING THIS FOR HER?” She asked him to do something that didn’t make much sense and he told her precisely why it didn’t make sense. Then she did the sensible thing instead. Problem solved.
I’m picturing some poor guy in a rusted brown Corolla with a Dominoes plastic logo bungee-corded to its roof pulling up to the church on a Sunday Morning. He opens the big wooden door with one hand, balancing the orange pizza-bag with the other,
and freezes as he sees the Mass service stop & 300 heads whip around to stare at him.
Minister (from pulpit)- “May we help you?”
Pizza Guy- “…two large double extra cheese?”
I asked her they don’t get delivery and she said its cheaper if someone picks it up. So I would be doing this to save him $6.
That would be so awesome.
For what it’s worth…our minister of music is also attending seminary. We don’t pay him 50K, but he does have a reduced work schedule. BUT…he gets just as much done as he did before, if not more, while caring for three kids under 6 and directing three choirs and a ton of other stuff. We are thrilled he’s going to seminary (and would be thrilled if he could get assigned to our church when he graduates) but the only feedback group I know of for him is when he asks for opinions or comments on a Facebook group set up for that…our church is big on using Facebook for stuff. So what kind of feedback does your guy need on such a regular basis?
OH! Now I see…the seminarian is too cheap to TIP the pizza guy…that changes it! He’s the jerk!
This.
Obviously I can only explain why I was going to respond in such a manner:
It’s because that’s not what he was proposing to do in the OP. He appeared to just be going to refuse. I (and apparently others) also made the assumption that the wife wouldn’t have asked him if all other possibilities hadn’t been exhausted.
If he really was the only one who could do it, and he was just going to refuse, he would have intentionally put his wife into a bind, and that would have been jerkish. The negative social results would have went to his wife and not him. Fortunately, that was not the situation, and the guy is not a jerk.
Though I still wonder how the dislike of the church factors in to either scenario: it’s either about helping his wife when she’s in a bind, or giving a job to someone for whom it is more convenient.
Personally I was just somewhat amused by the “I love my wife and would do anything for her” followed immediately by “except deliver a damn pizza to the church.”
I mean, I totally get where the OP is coming from and don’t really blame him in the slightest, particularly with the additional info he gave later on. I just thought that bit was funny.