I think it depends on what you want to happen. If you’re looking to stop the flirting altogether, I suggest one of the following courses:
Just want to be left alone
When casually mentioning your boyfriend (Nay, fiance!), tell him how great it was to find another person to fall in love with who shared your vast collection of venereal diseases.
Want him running scared
Start the psycho routine. Tell him that his flirting gets you all hot and you just can’t wait to get married and, by the way, where’s my ring??? WHERE IS IT YOU BASTARD? GET ME MY RING NOW OR YOU DIE DIE DIE!!!
Want to ensure it remains a cordial professional relationship
I’d say not to do that - depending on the guy, comments about “missing” your fiance can be perceived as, well, wanting to get some somewhere else.
I’ve been through a similar situation (without the fiance/SO though), and I finally had to start treating the guy only as a work colleague - no personal conversations, nothing. It sort of worked. Not completely though, but I don’t work there anymore so I never see him.
Maybe Angua should read it in the stars …
Nah. On second thaught, I think you’re being a big silly head.
The only reason this would bother you is if you don’t trust yourself. Obviously you’re happy with your fiance, so either forget about him for a moment and go for it or keep it as friendly flirting so the guy can go home alone and pleasure himself thinking about you.
If you think about it the right way, it’s actually flattering!
I’m not sure if he is sweet on you but I’m sure that he has thought about boinking you till he passes out.
I personally feel that a certain about of flirting without intent is acceptable for married or engaged persons. Just make sure he knows there is no intent.
LouisB its definitely A. He’s coming over on Friday, and I’m bouncing around like a Ribena Berry
Gorgon Heap My X Ray and Radio images are difficult enough to try and interpret the science from, let alone anything more
Yeah, I suppose it is flattering, and it probably explains why I’m so full of happy energy, apart from the fact that the SO’s coming over.
Zebra, there’s no intent, on my part at least. But now, after reading your comment about him thinking about boinking me until he passes out, I’m having to try very hard not to laugh like a maniac, I mean guys, c’mon, there is a solid partition between us (with Darth Vader standing in the way as well), but I’m not going to be able to keep a straight face whilst talking to him abotu this bleeding data reduction!
Aaah… its what happens when you start reading the SDMB when you should be figuring out:-
a) Where the centre of my galaxy cluster actually is,
b) Why my computer keeps on falling over trying to create a nice image of my cluster, and
c) Writing a proposal for the VLA in New Mexico!
It just occurred to me as I was reading through this thread that this is probably the first OP in the history of the SDMB that could be taken directly from the plot of a Terry Pratchett novel.
Do you have any male friends that you don’t think “like you in that way”? If so, invite one of them to the Christmas party if your fiancee can’t attend. I have quite a few female friends and have been used in this manner on a number of occasions. It didn’t bother me in the least. Just my 2 cents.
Very true… I’m sitting here trying not to giggle like a maniac. 