Am I being wierd or what? (Probably a question for the guys!)

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Right, so there’s this guy who I share an office with, he’s very nice, very sweet (oh, and very good looking). Anyway, we were at a club the other night, and we’re chatting away, and I’m complaining about how my high heels are killing me (I normally live in jeans and trainers (that’s sneakers to you Americans :))). So, he says, “well, how high are they?” to which I reply,

“Almost high enough to make me as tall as you.” To which he draws himself up to his full height, smiling in a very sexy way at me, and says,

“Not quite” With appropriate winking of the eye :slight_smile:

So, I brushed this off as nothing, and took a couple of hours off today to go and book our Christmas Party. I booked it, and sent an email round our research group asking who’s coming and sorting out the details of it.

Anyway, was chatting to him later, about the work - I’m having a few problems, and he brings up the subject of the Christmas party, so I casually ask him if he’s coming, and his entire face lights up, he flashes me this huge smile, and says “Of course I am”.

Now, am I being oversensitive in thinking that he might actually like me in any way as other than a friend? (He knows I’m involved with someone)

Thanks! 'Cause I’m confused by this! :confused:

2

You aren’t being oversensitive. He might like you that way, but I think it’s impossible to know for sure until you both get drunk at the Christmas party and xerox your asses together.

3

Yup, he’s sweet on ya. Maybe you could set the tone so things are more clear on the expectation front.

4

roflmao :smiley:

Well, considering the Christmas party’s being held at a classy restaurant, that’s not going to happen. :slight_smile: The getting hideously drunk, however, definitely will :wink:

5

UncleBill

[Whine]
But he knows I have a boyfriend! Nay a fiance!
[/Whine]

6

Umm… well even if he is all you’ve described is is sort of a harmless sorta/kinda flirtation and he knows you’re involved. Why is this an issue if you’re “involved”? :confused:

7

Err… because my other half’s a good 400 miles away (i.e. not with me), I’m an outrageous flirt, and I don’t want to be giving this guy the wrong idea…

…I know… In that case I shouldn’t flirt in the first place, but that’s like asking me not to breathe; its just the way I am.

8

You must learn to rise above your “excess flirtatious energy” like Julia Roberts in the Runaway Bride did.

9

:slight_smile: I’m normally very good. I don’t intend to flirt at all, and I know it sounds like a cop out, but I don’t consciously flirt. I’m just a friendly, outgoing person. :frowning:

10

I just had to say that this is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. Thanks, Eleusis! :smiley:

Angua, I’m a girl, and I hope my humble opinion counts, but I would say you need to cut down on the flirting. Maybe he thinks you’re up for a little play while the cat’s away, you know?

Good luck!

11

It does Skerri :slight_smile:

Its possible that he thinks that, but you can’t infer that from the wy I talk about my other half :confused:

12

You can use the Xerox for that? Cool.

tossing away the super glue and staple gun…

I have no valuable insight to offer. Just what everyone else said.

13

He either likes you or …

You know, I can’t think of an amusing alternative. You might drop not-so-subtle hints about missing your fiancé…

14

Either he likes you, or he is just flirting back. Or he’s flirting, hoping you like him and will dump your SO for him. Or something.

Whatever way it is, I agree with others here who think you should tone the flirting down.

15

Well, I’m going to chime in for the defense. I know that I’d have a great time flirting with an attractive woman who likes to flirt back, and wouldn’t generally expect anything beyond that in the situation you describe. Especially if I see the woman acting the same way with many other people. (Although I might dream of the day you two break up …)

When you need to worry is if he starts proposing ‘clandestine’ meetings well away from the workplace, and becoming distant with you at work and in other public places where you’re likely to meet mutual acquaintances. These are telltale signs of a man trying to set up for a torrid affair. But you can just say ‘no’, and he’ll undoubtedly take the hint.

This sounds like it could be a great friendship-don’t stress over it. (Unless you think your fiance would object. But if your flirting is as big a part of your personality as you claim, he probably needs to learn to deal with it, eh?)

16

Maybe he knows it’s safe to flirt with you because you have a boyfriend and nothing’s going to come of it. Maybe if you didn’t have a boyfriend he’d be all business around you, but the promise of a little harmless flirting with you attached to someone else is too much fun for him to resist.

17

Try to hook him up with one of your hottie friends. That should help him out a bit.

18
  • oh my, you Brits are so RANDY all the time … sigh.

:smiley:

19

TVGuy Its 7:45am, I haven’t even had breakfast yet… but I’m in fits if giggles! Hurrah! Another day where Angua spends the day on a permanent high! Thanks!

yosemitebabe Those are the same thoughts that have been going through my head. But yeah, I know I’ve got to not flirt, but I don’t know when I am flirting. I just think I’m being friendly. :confused:

SCSimmons My SO knows what I’m like and understands. To the extent that he’s even told me “I don’t care if other guys flirt with youand you flirt back, I know nothing’s going to hapen.” And you know what, he’s right. :slight_smile:

Hopefully, cuauhtemoc you’re right, in which case I don’t need to stress anymore. :slight_smile: Heck! I like your interpretation, that’s what my life’s normaly like anyway! So, I’m going with it, but also following other suggestions like not being an outrageous flirt!

And [B}AlbertRose**, I would, but they’re all either taken, or don’t want a relationship right now.

Thanks for the advice guys!

Angua

20

I think you wanted the guy to flirt back. I know you find him attractive—you as much as said so. This guy with whom you are “involved”—how “involved” are you? Will he attend the Christmas party? Will you be alone at the party?
Plus, you say “we were at a club the other night.” Who is “we”? The entire office staff? Or just you and the “very nice, very sweet (oh, and very good looking)” guy? Were you dancing with this guy? Lots of ways to take this story and I think you want to follow this path a little deeper into the woods—you just need someone to say it is okay to do that. So, believe me, it is okay. And even it if isn’t, its still going to be a lot of fun, so go for it.