So, I have decided I don’t like where I live (NE Wyoming). I don’t feel like part of the community, as I have different values than anything represented around here. I don’t like living in a conservative echo chamber, and this region only has one voice and speaks strictly in the language of Fox News. I don’t like that the state is completely against teaching using national science standards for fear that evolution and climate change will be taught to our children (I have 3 kids still in school, and a new grandson). I have no friends here any more, as they have all moved away; I feel it is time I did the same.
However, there are issues. At the risk of sounding completely naive and unworldly (admittedly, I am both), I don’t have a clue what it will entail. I haven’t had to look for a job since I was a teenager. I have worked the same job since high school- which means that I don’t have a degree that will open all of the doors I need to secure work. And to top it all off, my 16+ years at my job is so narrowly specialized that I can’t really translate it outside of the energy industry in Wyoming. My wife wants to move back to where she grew up (Minnesota), but I imagine that I will have to start at some entry level position which will likely mean a big pay cut. I’m not worried about that too much, as I don’t care one bit about money, aside from making sure my family is taken care of, and it would appear that the cost of living is far less in the area we are looking at than it is here.
The problem I keep running into, internally, is that I feel like I might be crazy for considering it. I make a decent amount of money now, and have poured half of my life into the company that I work for. I know there have been a lot of people out of work in recent years, and here I am thinking about walking away from a job I just fell into that pays more than many uneducated individuals could hope for.
Now, obviously my problems are my own, but I am curious what others might think. Am I crazy? Maybe some outside perspectives will help me focus my own thoughts.
I don’t think you’re crazy, but then I can’t imagine living in a community as you describe it.
It can’t hurt to explore job opportunities before moving, and see what’s available. The job market is on a steady upswing right now so the timing looks good. It wasn’t clear if your wife is also working or if you are the only breadwinner. If the latter, then you are right to be cautious; but it sounds like you feel like a slave to your paycheck, and I don’t think you can continue like that forever.
I’m guessing this feeling is actually fear: you’re scared, understandably and somewhat justifiably, of giving up a secure job and home you’re familiar with.
I can’t tell you whether or not moving would be the right thing to do, but I can assure you that you’re not crazy for at least considering it.
Here’s something to think about: Suppose your company announced tomorrow that it was closing and you were going to be out of a job. How would you feel: Devastated? Relieved, because now you have an excuse to make a change? Something else?
Like me, she is also without any post-secondary education, but she will also be working. I would imagine she is unlikely to find a job that pays much worse than what she makes here, so from her perspective, the cost of living difference may well make her paychecks stretch farther than they do here.
I wholeheartedly agree - it is definitely frightening to consider completely upending everything I have come to know. I might not feel particularly attached to this area, but I am exceedingly familiar with it.
I imagine that I would actually be somewhat elated if the company had to close its doors tomorrow, as my decision would then be made for me. I guess one of my largest problems is the guilt I feel about leaving a me-sized hole in the company!
I can sympathize. We moved (on very stable terms) in some small part because as “blue” as California is, most cities are pustulant red. Every social and public gathering was a miasma of Obama-hate, and if you so much as obviously tried to change the subject it was “Oh, of course, we’re not ALLOWED to talk about our viewpoint.” I don’t recall a single relaxed “liberal” discussion in the last five years we were there, even among friends who were anything but Fox News watchers. And the bumper-sticker war was over and lost; you couldn’t stop at a light without being reminded how that Muslim was ruining the country.
It can be a bitch. You may or may not be able to make it work, at least not without taking a hit. But I completely understand your motivations.
I don’t think you’re crazy at all. You only live once, why not try something new? Worst case scenario, you can move back to what’s familiar.
Here’s a cool site that asks you questions about what weather you like, whether you like mountains, beach, woods; what recreation you prefer, even your political leanings, other preferences and then gives suggestions for where you might enjoy living.
One you narrow down a couple possible places you might like, start looking for jobs, maybe even applying. Lots of places do skype interviews these days, which means they can talk to candidates who are willing to move but don’t yet live closeby. So that may be a possibility. Many people have sold almost everything and up and moved without prospects and little or no $$ cushion, which certainly would motivate you to find work in the new place! Like I said, you only live once. Unless there’s a serious reason that sort of thing would be hazardous for you, I say go for it!
A decent work history means a lot more than you’re giving it credit for. In your shoes, I’d probably try to find a concrete reason for the move (more education/unusual trade school certification) that wouldn’t carry potential baggage. But this is America: you’re free to do this.
Being at the same job for so long is a huge minus for many employers. No higher education is an even huger minus. Over 40 = pretty big minus. That isn’t to say I think any of this is a good thing; unfortunately the lives of working people are strictly bound by the needs and whims of the marketplace. That’s just how it is.
Another thing to consider might be that going to some more open minded less Fox newsy place might not make you any happier at all; you may just find your environment is replaced by unbearably snooty rather than unbearably conservative folks.
I don’t think you are crazy for wanting to move, but maybe you should find some other solution to your problem.
But, if you really do want to move, at least go to community college and get an associates degree, and then maybe see about transferring to a four year school in the place you want to move to. Since you have not been to college, you should be able to get loans easily.
What area of Minnesota are you looking at? I’d assume not the metro, since you say the cost of living is much lower than Gillette, but I have no idea what the cost of living is there, so maybe you are. In any case, there’s iron mining in the Duluth area and frac sand mining in the Winona/Rochester area, so you might be able to find a home for your skills.
Cost of living in Gillette is ridiculous. We are renting a little over 900 sq ft house that has outdated heating, and self purchased window ac units, a rickety porch with 3 bedrooms, one of which is just carpeted attic space that doesn’t even have a door for 1200.00 a month. And have been told we are lucky to have found it. A single wide 1970s trailer on a rental lot can and has sold for 50k. We are in a bust period right now, so prices are slightly better, but a boom period sees 5th wheel campers renting for 2000.00 a month. Metro area is cheaper.
One reason I, wife, wants to move is Wyoming does not recognize dyslexia as anything. We even had the teacher tell us the school board thinks it is fake. We are pretty certain our 10 year old has it. Minnesota does offer a lot of help and support that he needs. Maybe even get him to the point of being able to achieve better education on the college level to ensure he has a good foundation for a good life.
The bubble community that lives here is not something I wish for my kids to grow up around either. The bigotry, anti human rights unless you are white Christian Republican is not the personality I want my children having imprinted on them by their community. It is hard to teach them to respect, when I lack respect for people still OK with beating up gay people.
If it was up to me, I would just pack and go. It will work out some way. But I have moved a lot when younger. Krondys was raised in this bubble area. Oh and area we are looking at Montevideo. Close to several towns and not far from the cities at all. Considering here we have to drive 5 hours to even see a mall.
Based on what you both have described the pay cut you will take in moving is likely to be devastating and replacing your current incomes sounds like it would be almost impossible unless one of you has skills you have not discussed. You’re both likely to be living on near minimum wage incomes and the hours and work you will be forced to put in for these jobs will quite probably be very physically demanding. Being poor is physically wearing on multiple levels.
I’ll all for being optimistic but per your OP if you two are 40 to 50 year olds with high school educations and area specific, specialized job skills. You will likely be existing in the deep underclass elsewhere. If the main concern is your child get professional outside help. Giving up the cash flow necessary for a middle class existence is going to nuke your lives and once that decent paying job you have now is lost it may not be recoverable given your age.
Unless you have big savings I’d try to muddle through. IMO living close to the poverty line in your 40’s and 50’s is worse than having conservative cranks for neighbors.
I was kinda thinking the same thing. You said 16+ years at a job you’d been at since highschool, putting you at a likely maximum of 35 years old. Probably the grandson threw them off?
