Am I evil or a masochist, or do very sad things make you feel a very weird kind of 'good'?

I have heard it said that a good cry can be cathartic.

When I was going through a really horrible time a few years ago I experienced this. As part of my then routine I went for a bike ride. I stopped at a very private beach, sat down, and after some thought began to sob like a little girl. It was cathartic. It actually felt good to do that.

I don’t understand. Why does feeling so bad that you cry feel good? Or is this unique to people like me and I’m somehow the wrong type of person?

I think a good cry can be really cathartic and I still let it happen once in a while.

Growing up, I was always one of those quiet kids who kept everything in. Insecurities, worries, stress, family drama…I never talked about those things to anyone.
Although small issues in their own, they would gradually build up like drops into a cup which would eventually spill over. Just one more little drop to trigger and it would come pouring out at the worst time- in math class, at my job, in front of my guidance counselor who called me in for unrelated matters. It was terribly embarrassing because the stress of trying to keep everyone out and everything in just exacerbated the problem. Fill, overflow, fill, overflow.

Anyway, I realized that this current pattern wasn’t going to work. Instead, I allowed myself to cry in private. It didn’t matter if the things I cried over were trivial or not- I could control it. I could pick when, why, and how I wanted to cry instead of leaving it to chance. It’s wonderful to have that as an option and to have that feeling of catharsis before I go to continue the rest of my day.