Am I Snooty Snooterson? (Filling pricey liquor bottle with cheap booze)

In My Humble Opinion
1

So I’m at a gathering at a co-worker’s home. He’s proud of his new basement bar, and he’s got several bottles of really top-shelf booze set out, from which he’s proudly pouring drinks for any and all who ask.

One of the bottles was Glenfiddich. I’m a fan, so I asked him to pour me a shot.

It was NOT Glenfiddich. It tasted very much like Cutty Sark – not a bad blended Scotch, all things considered, but certainly not a single malt and certainly not a Glenfiddich.

I wouldn’t have said anything, but as I slowly sipped my drink, he asked me how I liked it. Three times.

The first two I gave him noncommittal answers like, “Thanks, it hits the spot,” and “Yeah, good thing my wife’s driving!” in a cheery voice. But when he responded, “Yeah, and that’s expensive stuff, so enjoy,” I couldn’t take it.

I said something like, “Actually, I’m pretty sure this isn’t Glenfiddich. Malt scotch is kind of a hobby of mine.”

He gave me this little half smile and said in almost a stage whisper, “Yeah, I poured a bottle of the cheap stuff in there. Saves money and impresses the rubes, you know?”

Ha, ha.

Now, this isn’t of earth-shattering importance. It’s not like someone’s going to be allergic to Cutty Sark and safe with The Macallan. He’s not risking anyone’s health.

But it strikes me as a really assholish thing to do, and I was sorely tempted to start circulating the party, talking loudly about how the Scotch was mislabeled. I didn’t, of course, because I’m not ten.

But I was really tempted, which might mean I’m about fifteen. Or is this ire a reasonable adult reaction?

2

The guy is not only conniving and duplicitous, he’s an outright liar (“that’s expensive stuff, so enjoy”) and a snob to boot (“impresses the rubes”). I think to call his behavior assholish is rather mild, myself.

3

Your host was classless. That’s a lowbrow move on his part.

By refraining from making an issue of it, you showed your class.

So, IMHO your reaction was reasonable, your restraint was admirable.

4

No, I think the assholish thing wasn’t so much the switching of the Scotch, but his trying to play “gotcha!” by repeatedly asking you what you thought. He was pretty obviously trying to catch you up and expose you as ignorant of your Scotch.

Which, according to Miss Manners, makes him a fuckwit. I’m sure it’s in a book somewhere. Polite people don’t try to make other people uncomfortable or feel ignorant in polite company.

You made the best, most polite replies possible given what you were handed - not the Scotch, but about the rudeness.

5

Exactly. Good show.

6

Shoot, the hell with the booze issue, seriously. Might be annoying and silly but it’s not illegal. But… after that evening I’d have to ask myself if his behavior extended to dishonest or unethical practices in other parts of his life. If he were my coworker that’s what I’d wonder anyhow, but maybe I’m just paranoid.

7

In this kind of personal situation I typically prefer to resort to vandalism. Step 1: locate his wife’s most expensive bottle of perfume. Barring that, his cologne or shaving tonic. Step 2: replace perfume or cologne with said swill.

What does this make me? Eight?

8

Personally if it had been me I couldn’t care less. It’s not like he was substituting cheap bourbon for the good stuff. It was only scotch and thus was only aimed at the rubes, not real drinkers.

9

Aside from rude, this guy is just plain stupid. He’ll get a lot further in life by not offending the clued-in crowd than he will by impressing the rubes. The people who are likely to know he’s pulling a cheap stunt are probably more influential where it counts than the people who are impressed by his phony show of beverage bling.

You can only hope to come back in your next life as the true innocent who accidentally tips his hand. Sure, the Cutty Sark allergy is improbable, but maybe you could have been genuinely concerned he had paid full price for an imposter? Or that his butler was watering the Scotch? Next you’ll be telling me he didn’t have a real butler…

10

IMO it’s a sign of serious insecurity, of a person living beyond his means. I think the majority of folks out there are probably doing the same - mortgaged to the hilt, new cars every 5 years, credit card balances that would stagger some small countries. He’s probably way in over his head and is trying desperately to keep up the charade, hoping for some miracle, like an inheritance or the lottery, to save his bacon.

I think Harriet the Spry makes a good point, when she says “He’ll get a lot further in life by not offending the clued-in crowd than he will by impressing the rubes. The people who are likely to know he’s pulling a cheap stunt are probably more influential where it counts than the people who are impressed by his phony show of beverage bling.” However, people in this situation rarely care about outliers who can call their bluff, they want to shine in front of the masses.

I suggest you carry a hip flask with you filled with Glenmorangie (not Glenfidditch…blech)* when you visit his house in the future, and refuse his drinks. That might get the message across.

  • FTR, that’s a joke. IMO, all whiskey is pretty much swill.
11

He’s also an idiot because the rubes would prefer Cutty Sark to a single malt.

12

Next time you go to his house, bring a host gift. Maybe a bottle of Grey Goose or Chopin, but fill it with some generic vodka. Tell him you’ve made it “just the way he likes it.”

13

Qadgop’s answer is exactly what I would have said. But I’ll add (and I’m sure you’ve thought of this already), that you may wish to think carefully about attending any social events involving alcohol at this person’s home in the future. Who knows what else he may be replacing?

14

Now that’s fitting! Better yet, replace the vodka with 40/60 Everclear and tap water.

15

I’d be worried about what made it’s way into the hors d’ouevres.

16

I started out typing a long reply, but Qadgop summed it up much more concisely. And I liked the point about your host trying to impress all the wrong people.

17

On a side note, as **Whynot **said what I would, I think you might gain some insight into how he views you. I would look at where he is in the work hierarchy compared to you by his actions in (basically) turning himself in to you and making such a big deal out of it.

If he is your superior or lateral colleague I wonder if he is intimated by you and wanted to giggle to himself "That know-it-all Bricker thinks he is such hot sh^t and I pulled one over on him."

If he is your inferior or possibly a colleague who needs your alliance or services often it could be a ham-handed compliment along the lines of “I* knew you would get that Bricker, you and I are a cut above the rubes”.
*
I think his actions in this matter with you, unless he was feeling guilty and looking for someone to call him on his BS, might say more about him than his appalling hosting skills and insecurities.

18

Yes, I understand some brands of cat food are almost indistinguishable from pâté de foie gras. :smiley:

19

It feels a little late at this point. Everyone said it better, but you did the right thing and your co-worker was being an ass doubly. Both in doing the substitution which is just dumb (is he a salesman or maybe in marketing? :wink: ) and trying to catch you enjoying his cheaper stuff.

Jim

20

Wow. That was a pretty “Columbo” pull. Yes, he’s one of the business development/marketing guys. We’re not in each other’s direct line; I manage an active contract and he seeks new business for the company.