LMAO!!!
I am so mad at myself for missing making the Brownie-Nazi connection! Dammit!
wherein you re-enact your response to the little girl, because your narrative simply doesn’t convey a level of rudeness that would make the purchase of three hundred dollars worth of Thin Mints seem like an appropriate compensatory action. The entire incident, from the brusque response to the G.S. (I wasn’t aware that Brownies were given cookie-sales duties, btw, somebody please check me if I’m mistaken), to the intention of a somewhat overadequate fence-mending attempt, coupled with the arduous work you were engaged in at the time, suggests that your blood sugar may have been just a teensy bit outside its ideal range.
I haven’t yet encountered the issue with Kayla, as she won’t be old enough to join the Girl Scouts for another couple of years, but I do not intend to sell her cookies for her when the time does come (feel free to file this one under “Famous Last Words,” all you Girl Scout parents out there, and then snigger gleefully at me when I’m proven wrong). To be sure, if she chooses to sell cookies, I will ensure that her door-to-door excursions are adult-supervised, but I have no illusions that every no-sale encounter will be with someone as courteous as you were. A ten-year-old girl should certainly be socialized sufficiently to recognize an adult who is busy, frustrated, and approaching the end of his or her tether (my own experience suggests that by age four they are adept at cultivating such a condition). No, you didn’t do her any damage, and it could be argued that you provided her a valuable opportunity to practice not viewing an unsuccessful vending attempt as a rejection of her as a human being.
If you do ever catch up with her, though, and find yourself with a gross of Thin Mints that need a good home, give a shout, and I’ll provide you with my shipping address. Better yet I’ll send you a pre-paid UPS shipper.
#3. “Buy THIS, bitch!” (grabs tit)
(As she walks away) “Little fucking brat. Look at me! Ohhhh! I’m a GIRL SCOUT!! Go Heil fucking Hitler in someone else’s yard, you snotty cocksucker.”
Around here they do. Even long ago, when my sister was a Brownie she sold cookies.
For those wondering what a girl that young was doing walking alone - well, it is somewhat bothersome to me as well. But I live in a real “Pleasant Valley Sunday” type of neighborhood, so while it is not advisable for 10-year olds to walk around alone, in reality her chances of coming to harm here are pretty much zero.
And Sara - Me-ow! 
I wonder what Number 1 will be - it will have to be an “Eighth Wonder of the World” heartless response, so think before you post…
- See this (waves twenty dollar bill in front of her)? Ya want it? Do ya? WELL YA CAN’T HAVE IT! Get the fuck outta my yard befoe I sue your stinkin’ hide and make your family bankrupt! Ya fuckin’ Cookie hustlin’ beeeeeaaaatch!
I didn’t think that Girl Scout Cookie sales were until February/March? How is she selling them now.
I think someone got taken by a midget scam artist in a Brownie uniform. Hey, that sounds like it could be a valid career move.
- (completely dead tone of voice and absent expression) I’m sorry. My lord Satan won’t allow me to buy such things.
I’m just stunned. I’m speechless. I literally don’t know what to say.
You saw an actual Girl Scout selling Girl Scout cookies? I thought they were only sold by their parents at the office. You have blown my mind.
- Rather than responding, Ant kidnaps the child and, through blood transfusion and an IV drip, tortures her for years, taunting her constantly about cookies as she mutilates her body.
Doesn’t being a bit curt with the girl seem so much less evil in comparison to kidnapping and torturing her for a period of several years? Huh? Feel better? Huh?
Uh…yeah, I guess so. Although, you will have to excuse me while I take a shower after thinking about that scenario you posted.
Actually, I only mentioned my diabetes in the OP so people wouldn’t ask why I didn’t want the cookies.
But truth be told, I did have serious low blood sugar problems yesterday due to the unexpected exertion and a diet test, and in fact was up at 2:00 am and 3:50 am this morning because of that too (yawn). I didn’t want to mention those particulars, because then all sorts of people accuse you of “using your disease as a crutch and seeking pity”. Oops, thats what I’m doing right now I guess. :rolleyes:
Una, I have to admit that when I saw the title my first reaction was “oh, no, not again!”
Nah, you weren’t overly rude, you’ve got nothing to worry about. I used to have to sell Girl Scout cookies and crap for band all the time, it’s as much of a pain in the ass for the girl as it is for the customers. I’m damn lucky I didn’t run into some neighborhood pedophile walking around alone in my little uniform. I used to get the local drug dealer to buy my whole stock of cookies in order to “give back to the community.” Anyway, I was used to seeing garage doors coming down whenever I walked up the street (people pretending not to be home) - I think they had some kind of phone tree about me.
[psuedo-anth]I did it all for the nookie, YEAH THE NOOKIE, so you can take that COOKIE and stick it up your ASS, stick it up your ASS…[/]
Whoa! - My hat just blew off!
Yes. 
No, of course not… that’s no where near the worst that the kid is going to get.
but back to Lsura’s question -
Where are you that you can get girl scout cookies in November??? My stash has run out and I don’t particularly want to wait until next March.
-amarinth
As someone who used to work in sales, let me say that you did the girl a favor by giving her a mild taste of what she could expect.
By the way, when I worked 3rd shift, I frequently slammed the door on well-meaning kids selling shit at my door. The doorbell would ring, I would stagger downstairs still in REM sleep, barely hear what they said, and literally slam the door. I once did it to a kid offering to shovel my sidewalk, then a minute later when I realized what I’d done, I chased him down the block in bare feet (in the snow) because I REALLY needed my walk shoveled. It became kind of a joke to the kids, and I made up for my bitchiness by giving out full size candy bars at Trick or Treat time.
Oh, and my neighbors next door had some kids living with them (grandkids or some such) that were a major pain in the ass- always in my yard, bugging my dogs, etc. One day I had a fit and went outside and yelled at all 3 doe-eyed kids and put one right into tears. I felt bad an hour later (they’re just kids) and went over the see the neighbor lady. She said (dead serious)- “Don’t worry about it. I just told them you drink a lot and to stay away from your yard”. I didn’t know if I should laugh or what, but the kids stayed away. Someday they’ll be having a holiday meal and say “Remember that weird lady that used to live next door to Grandma that yelled at us? The one that drinks?”
Zette
I’m here in Kansas City. And I don’t know when the cookies would be delivered actually, I didn’t let the poor little girl get far enough to tell me that…
I’m hearing…Limp Bizkit, is it?
Am I the Cruelest, most Heartless Bitch Ever?
Naw, Anth. You ain’t never met my ex-ol’ lady. :rolleyes:
All the little turds know I’m a idiot who’ll buy some of that crap and shamelesly take advantage of me.
Thanks for getting me a little vicarous revenge.