Amazing Device

There is a neat little device that comes with all cars at no extra charge that has the potential of making driving much safer and more convenient for everyone. It is called a turn signal. The only drawback is that YOU HAVE TO USE THE BLEEDIN’ THING.

It seems that 1 out of 3 drivers do not. Why not? I am perplexed. It is not a newfangled device; it’s been around as long as I can remember. It is neither difficult nor in any way inconvenient to use. In fact, I am hard-pressed to think of any more effortless task than the flick of the finger to turn on the turn signal. What’s more, it will become habit in about a week of driving. You don’t even have to think to do it. It requires the brainpower involved in emitting flatulence.

But, since so many people either don’t use or misuse this clever tool, we can’t even trust those that do use it correctly. We never know if they are being reasonable adults with IQs above room temperature, or if they are in the 33% of drooling, butt-picking idiots who can barely navigate in shoes, much less motor vehicles.

I tend to not use gestures, since my middle finger is in cahoots with my trigger finger and that sort of influence could have fatal consequences.

Thank you. I’m all better now.

i HATE people who dont use the turn signal.
i dont know how many times i have wanted to go out of the car and politely, with the tone to indicate that the person i am talking to is stupid, as the person to please use the turn signal.

thank you kindly

What’s truly amazing is how infrequent police use these devices. For this year, I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve seen a policeman signal before turning. Zero times on lane changes.

In dallas, if you use the turn signal, it’s a cue for the drivers in the other lane to close the gap so you can’t get in. It’s actually easier to merge without it, right or wrong.

All this science, I don’t understand. It’s just my job 5 days a week-- Rocketman

Sheesh,where do You see these people? All I see(even tho just a passenger) are turn signals going and going…they never turn!

Yes, they are just as bad as the ones who don’t use them at all. That’s why I included those “who misuse” turn signals in my rant.

TennHippie, they moved down from Cleveland. There appears to be a law, here, that natives can only use the signal lever as a post from which to hang purses or lunch boxes.

Orangecakes, that’s because you keep getting behind the people whose purses and lunch boxes have pulled the lever into the “on” position.

I have also encountered the folks that moved up here from Dallas, metroshane, although more rarely.

My brother and I each moved to Cleveland in the late 70’s and used to mumble about the lack of signals. Then my brother ran into a co-worker who had taken I-75 down to Florida and was ranting about all the stupid Michigan drivers who “just put on their signal and changed lanes.”
My brother, with as much restraint as he could muster, pointed out that in Michigan (where people actually use the things) a signal was not a request–it was a statement of intent.


Hey, don’t you guys know that turn signals aren’t functional? The folks in Detroit and Tokyo put them on your car so that your car can have pretty, blinking lights on the outside, like a Christmas tree! How festive for the upcoming holiday season!

Well, as far as I can tell, that’s what they’re used for in Pittsburgh.

Never attribute to malice anything that can be attributed to stupidity.
– Unknown

People in Raleigh have no concept of a turn signal. Pisses me off to no end…

Some of them will use the signal AFTER they completed the turn or lane change. Guess they want to tell you where they’ve BEEN…

Someone far braver than I had a great way to get these fuck-wads. Pull alongside of them, impolring them to roll down their window.

When they do, act all concerned and slightly panicked. “There’s something wrong with your car! Pull over!”

When they ask what’s wrong, say “Your turn signal doesn’t work!”

Yer pal,

Just be happy you don’t drive like an Italian diplomat. (Yes that is by far my worst driving insult ever.) I used to use it until I moved to the DC area. Now, if you put your turn signal on the bastards will try their hardest to not let you over. During rush hour traffic in the morning you have to merge into traffic without a car length of space. If you put your turn signal on in that type of traffic, you will wreck into the other car. Trust me on this one. People up here drive extremely aggressively. Anyway, I used to hate people that don’t use their turn signals, but now I just don’t care.


Gasoline: As an accompaniement to cereal it made a refreshing change. Glen Baxter

I almost got broadsided by some asshole last month. He signalled, got into the turning lane, then decided at the last minute he wasn’t going to turn and damn near hit me because I was starting to turn left.

My point? If you signal, get in the turning lane, and slow down, then decide it’s the wrong turn, fucking complete the turn you brain-dead waste of good DNA!!!

– Sylence

And now, for my next trick, I will talk in spooky half-references.

The great thing about driving a piece of shit is that you don’t care about getting scratched. If that old woman in the new Mercedes insists on forcing her car into my lane without even signalling that’s ok with me, I’ll just keep right on going and take off her mirror.

Here in Quebec we have no fault insurance. Do what you want, cause you’re paying for it.

It’s not like there’s a big chance of getting into a serious accident in a traffic jam.

Yup, I think that one’s true the world over. But I’m sure it must be hell in that 10-zillion lane section of I-10 that passes through Dallas-Ft worth. You have my pity.

Errrr I-20 , not I-10.

I totally agree with you on this TennHippie I loathe people who dont use turn signals, and I dont even have a drivers licence. I think the penalty for not indicating a turn should be the same as for crossing a red light, because its almost the same thing. ie you are not allowed to make the turn before the light starts flashing.

BTW people who give the signal in the same instant as turning are also a pest.

There was a funny joke in a Mad magazine. If you want to mess with a driver,point at his tires,til he stops to see whats wrong,then just pass him by!

Yes! I am from Michigan, and I use my turn signal! About a hundred years ago, my driver’s ed instructor got me started. He showed me how easy ‘n’ fun it was, and once I heard the “click,” I was hooked.

I have encountered may people, though, who object to the practice of turn-signalling. I don’t understand why. It’s a victimless crime. I’m not harming anyone by using my turn signal, in the privacy of my own car. It’s not as though I just turn it on and leave it on forever and ever. Just an occasional click, to get me around the next corner.

reading this thread has brought me hope. I feel so much better, knowing there are other turn-signal users out there. I am not alone.

I don’t drive because of the very people you all described. I fear for my life.

I walk to work and one day I came to a 4-way stop. There was only one other car, on the right, with her right turn signal on, and hugged the curb like she was going to turn. So, (fool that i am) I assumed that she wasn’t going to go straight and thus pass by me,I thought that she was going to turn so i crossed the street. She didn’t turn! She went straight and almost ran me over and yelled at ME! Apparently I was supposed to read her mind. I just gave her the finger and kept going.

More woman than you’ll ever inflate!

I’m with MaryAnnQ on this one, as I don’t drive either. You may be surprised how important using your indicators is to a pedestrian - but it truly is! Especially on a suburban corner without a walk signal, where it’s all judgement and timing. If we don’t know where the traffic is going, then we are in danger of being killed.

Bastards, the lot of them!

Taxi Drivers piss me off - they break every single road rule there is, because “they’re Taxi drivers! They operate beyond the normal restrictions of mere mortals!”

Dickheads. I hope their stupid beaded seat-covers get moulded permanently to their butt.

Hero For A New Millennium!

The Legend Of PigeonMan - updates every Wed & Sat

basic rule in traffic: dont expect everybody to drive like you expect them to.

good rule, but that doesnt mean drivers shouldnt try to their utmost to indicate what they are going to do next. for sods sakes, there is a reason the break lights, turning lights, headlights and reverse lights(whatever they are called) were invented.