Alcoholic seltzer water? Think White Claw. They seem quite popular these days.
Something I’ve posted previously:
I guess I’d rather not be average. By my calculation, the average American has 0.99 testicle. Two is perfectly fine. One is OK, I suppose. Zero is perfectly fine. But that missing 0.01 simply can’t be pleasant.
Interestingly, I don’t think I’ve met more than a small handful of Jessicas in my life despite being born in 1981. My wife’s physician’s first name is Jessica, and she’s in the right age group, but other than that I can’t think on any (non-internet 
) Jessicas I know. I don’t think I’ve ever worked with a Jessica.
Also interestingly, a lot of my students (late teens) have “old-fashioned” names: Mae, Lilian, Charlotte, Marie, Cora, Sterling, William, George, Robert, Frank, Taylor (both male and female for that one). It’s a welcome change from the “unusual” spelling of otherwise normal names that was all the rage in the late 90’s/early 2000’s: Jaymez, Zakree, Baileigh, etc.
Some who started off with two may have a complaint about that, though.
I have encountered the Y phenomenon twice. Two males; a Justyn and a Carsyn.
You could ask the 0.58-of-a-boy from The Phantom Tollbooth (who was part of an average family, with 2.58 children):
“A few years ago I was just .42 and, believe me, that was terribly inconvenient.”
I apparently know all the Jessicas. There are three on my street, and so many more in my life. And Mikes. And all the Daves I know (I know, I know).
As a kid, I was surrounded by Jennifers, but oddly I no longer encounter any at all. Where did all the Jennifers go?
If they’re like my sister, they became "Jen"s.
Jennicide
That was clever!
“Look, I’m above-average in doing the average, but I’m below-average in doing the above-average.”
You’re welcome. I don’t sneeze everyday but when I do it’s often 30-40 sneezes in a row. It’s pretty debilitating.
I went to a wedding last fall and there were 8 of us at the wedding!
When we went on the bachelorette trip, there were 4 Jessicas. Enough for there always to be one in every sub-group (some hiking, some bar hopping).
She’s been pregnant for 135 days 16 hours
Doesn’t work in Alabama.
I had a co-worker like that. Was next cube over. I would email her Gesundheit, Gesundheit,Gesundheit, Gesundheit,Gesundheit, Gesundheit,Gesundheit, Gesundheit…
I sneez REAL loud. My wife covers her ears.
I have to be very careful. I can throw my back out with a sneeze. The dog runs away.