America! The diversity kingdom! So many geniuses! So many, many morons! We have EVERYTHING, and we have the biggest, best, and worst of everything.
If you’re American, who is it that makes you want to deny it? If you’re not American, who makes you happiest to be from somewhere else?
I’m having trouble the absolute cream of our scum. Help me out. Some of my nominees are:
Michael Jackson
that Jackass guy
Courtney Love
Al Sharpton – who I must admit seems less insane in recent years
Louis Farrakhan
Tonya Harding
Rush Limbaugh
Actually, I’m not 100% sure thay are all Americans, but we seem to be stuck with them now. I know some of you will insist on Bill Clinton or GWB, but neither of them IMO can hold a candle to any of the lost in terms of overt nuttiness.
I encourage new nominations. I don’t intend my list to be exhaustive.
My first thought before I opened this thread was number one on your list.
Micheal Jackson.
He goes to other countries and has a large following, hopefully those people don’t think we are all like that.
Geoffrey Fieger. You may remember him from such famous criminal cases as Amedure vs. Jenny Jones and Michigan vs. Kevorkian (“Dr. Death.”) I will never forgive him for running for governor of Michigan, forcing me to vote for that jerk Engler instead of risking the election of a completely inept jackass.
Honestly, hearing Spanish people I know react to American conservatives calling them Al-Quaeda appeasers/sympathizers simply for voting out the inept Aznar administration has made me more ashamed of some of my fellow citizenry than anything else I can remember lately. So, I guess that means Andrew Sullivan, David Brooks, Rush Limbaugh, Instapundit, various and sundry dopers, etc.
Celebrities don’t embarrass me that much (if someone made an assumption about me based on Michael Jackson I’d be too busy rolling on the floor laughing to be upset). I’m more likely to be embarrassed by American tourists (any non-asian tourists, actually, since we’re all assumed to be American) here in Japan acting like complete pinheads. Not just being clueless in a new environment, that I can understand. I’m talking about but doing things that would be viewed as obnoxious and rude back home.
Recent examples:
the pack of drunk 15-year-olds trying to slam dance in a crowded evening commuter train (gotta love embassy brats :rolleyes: )
the two men in military uniforms who decided the easiest way to eliminate all the confusion regarding the various forms of address in Japanese was to simply call everyone “fuckin’ asshole” and “fuckin’ bitch,” with the latter expression frequently preceeded by “you wanna suck my dick?”
Whitney Houston (Coke-head)
Bobby Brown (Cokehead and the reason why Whitney is a cokehead)
Paris Hilton (She’s an idiot, slut, and IMHO she’s not even that hot)
Terrell Owens (wah, wah - “Terrel Owens is not happy. WAH”)
Jessica Simpson (She’s so dumb, but she is hot)
FWIW, I’m not American (although I have lived in the US for a couple of years), and if it’s any consolation for Boyo Jim, I think the following entries from the original list:
that Jackass guy
Al Sharpton
Louis Farrakhan
Rush Limbaugh
will be unknown entities to most non-Americans. Likewise, the names Al Franken & Dennis Miller will have most people scratching their heads.
But if I may add a category and not a specific name to the list: Jerry Springer show participants. Yes, that show is exported quite a bit…
Why? I think you’ll find that foreigner’s opinions of America are moderated because of people like them. Incomprehensible to you I am sure but the rest of us just don’t give a fuck about Whitewater or Chappaquiddick. Part of what we like is what they don’t do. None of them are responsible for military bases on our soil. None of them are using their influence to block stem cell or climate change research. The list goes on and is the reason why America’s old friends just wish you’d get some counseling and reflect on the damage you’ve done to your relationships.
It’s those pinko liberals and their ilk that are responsible for the rest of the world having any time for you.
You’d think somebody who called someone a “white hateful skinhead” would check to make sure that, a) he had a shaved head, and b) wasn’t black, wouldn’t you?
Put me down for Dubya, too; not because of his policies, but because he’s the Jessica Simpson of the world stage.
Terrell Owens is pretty much unknown outside the States. Foreigners may stay up late to watch the Superbowl, but they don’t know who the teams playing are and they don’t know what the hell is going on either. I was one of perhaps nine people in all of Britain who had more than a cursory knowledge of (American) football, and I’m here now.
