Many years ago I read something that was purportedly written by an eight-year-old (actually, I’m not sure about his age) describing, in his view, the qualifications necessary to be a pilot. This is one of those things that ‘made the rounds’ via photocopies in the days before the Internet. I remember it being cute and naïve, and there was something like ‘Oh yeah, he should be able to read a road map.’
Does this ring a bell with anyone?
Yes it rings bells with me, but I have no idea how to find it.
I changed my search to ‘pilot’, ‘qualifications’, and ‘“read a road map”’ and was able to find it.
It may be slightly different from the version I remember, as I thought it said ‘when a wing or engine falls off’. ‘Breaks away’ and ‘airhostesses’ sounds as if it may have been altered for UK-types. (Or I read it the way it is, and those things didn’t register.)
Thanks for replying, as it made me search again.
Cool. It’s remarkably accurate 
I gathered that with that usage of the word “proper” but I’m surprised with regard to “breaks away” instead of “falls off”. Does the latter construction sound peculiarly North American?
As for “proper” I’ve always thought it was an interesting example of the difference in dialects. As far as I can tell, outside North America it almost always means “actual” or “genuine”, while here it almost always means “appropriate”, or “acceptable according to some standard of etiquette, behavior, or decency”–in short, propriety. It has a spin of exhorting control and restraint, as one might speak to a child.
ETA I must admit from my perspective that “breaks away” is not the first thing I would choose to say to describe the situation, so I guess I"ve answered my own question.
Outside North America it’s a synonym for “thoroughly correct”. Hence “proper pronunciation” means “correct pronunciation” not “genuine pronunciation”.
That’s the only other meaning it has elsewhere as well. That’s the sense in which it is used here : an acceptable job. In North Am you’d probably say “real job” to indicate that the job is perceived as not acceptable ethically or socially. Being an actor, for example, is isn’t a “proper job” or “real job” insofar as it’s perceived as entailing neither work nor skill.
This reminds me of the note allegedly from another eight-year-old to a Qantas captain. You’ve probably seen that before, but it’s a good laugh.
Yes. An American child (and probably most adults) would probably say ‘falls off’ instead of ‘breaks away’. Personally, I prefer to say ‘departs the aircraft’.
And air hostess isn’t something we said here. An American kid would have said ‘stewardesses’. (Remember this is very old.)
‘Breaks off’ would be another option (‘falls away’ is right out).
Personally I’d say, “go bye-bye.”
I hadn’t seen it and almost spit coffee all over my laptop when I read the last line. 
I was thinking “deplane”.
Yeah, I was imagining the pilot reading it. 'Aw, what a cute little… WHA…? :eek: ’
Yes, but (I’m assuming you’re not North American) you wouldn’t say you have to get a thoroughly correct job, would you? Or that you want to save up some money to buy a thoroughly correct guitar, motorcycle, or set of tools? “Correct” or “thoroughly correct” is pretty close to my perception of proper, although correct usually implies factual or structural accuracy, while proper is more about social and cultural conformance. Obviously there’s a lot of overlap there, e.g. “dress correctly” and “dress properly”, but even here I would say that dressing properly means wearing suitable attire for work, a social situation, etc., while dressing correctly lays greater emphasis on wearing the right clothes for the weather, elements, what have you. Be that as it may, I probably would have included “correct” in my list of definitions for “proper” that I gave above, had I thought of it.
I imagine there are dialect differences regarding this within the UK. Like many Americans of my generation, my first extensive exposure to UK dialects was through material on the Beatles, who came from the North (for you younger readers). IIRC to them a “proper guitar” would be one that is adequate for their needs, e.g. a good quality guitar as opposed to a shoddy one. So maybe it’s a Northern thing?
That’s the only other meaning it has elsewhere as well. That’s the sense in which it is used here : an acceptable job. In North Am you’d probably say “real job” to indicate that the job is perceived as not acceptable ethically or socially. Being an actor, for example, is isn’t a “proper job” or “real job” insofar as it’s perceived as entailing neither work nor skill.
[/QUOTE]
ETA What with our talk about BrE and AmE dialect differences, I realize that this usage of “spit” looks odd to some of you–it almost looks funny to me too. That can happen when you think about this stuff too much.
Whereas I, on hearing “dress correctly”, would be thinking “Socks first then shoes”, or the like. Someone wearing a five-inch-wide necktie with orange polka dots and purple stripes would be “dressed correctly”, as long as the tie was tied around the neck and hanging in front of the shirt.
You apparently missed where I said "That’s [“appropriate”, or "acceptable according to some standard] the only other meaning it has elsewhere as well.
In this usage, it appears that the child is referring to what an American would call a “regular” job, meaning more conventional, and not actual or genuine.
As I pointed out, it has exactly the same meaning as “real job”. It’s not so much that it’s unconventional as that there is a perception that it’s not truly work.