Please do not drink anyting before reading this.
Last year, in college, I woke up at about 10:30 (normal college morning) and I couldn’t find my right arm! I meanit was not where it should have been. Have you ever slept on you arm so long that it fell completely asleep? Well, that’s what happened to me. I found it above my head, and picked it up and attempted to put it where it should have been. But, seeing as I had just awakened, my aim was a little off. Now, if you have ever moved an arm or leg of yours that had been asleep you would know that you can’t feel the arm/leg and it is very heavy, especially if you’re as big as I am. Well, I tried to put it beside me but ended up hitting myself very hard in the balls and that caused me to try and double up. So I quickly moved my arm up and away and hit my self in square in the nose, and, jerked it away and hit my self in the balls again, and harder that time. After the second shot to the nads, I sat straight up in bed and busted my head on the ceiling(I was on the top bunk). So lets count that up. I had been hit twice in the nads, had a bloody nose, and I couldn’t see straight because I slammed my head on the ceiling. I tried to roll out of my single bed with out hurting myself and get to the bathroom or at least away from my now demon possessed dorm room. As I roll out of bed I straddled the chair that had been so I could put myself up into bed and again, slammed my cojones down on the top bar of that chair. I went into the bathroom after I had picked myself up off of the floor and washed the blood off of my face and chest and tried to get as much as I could out of my shorts. My pelvic region was in a lot of pain and I felt down there and my left nut had swollen to about the size of a tennis ball. So I started flipping out and yelling and one of the R.A.'s came over from across the hall. We ended up going to the emergeny room, and I will spare you the details from there. So when I went back to classes the next day, i had to explain why I had a black eye. That was a fun day.
I don’t know what to say, Chris. Ouch, I guess.
I’ve had my arm fall asleep like that–above my head–but I freaked out when I woke up because I’d dreamt it had fallen off.
So you that it’s pretty traumatic when you wake up and it just isnt’ there…
:eek:
Bwa ha ha ha ha!
Geez, thanks for the warning up front. I would have blown Dr. Pepper all over the screen otherwise.
Oh brother! that sounds painful. Well, i certainly hope you feel better, reading that had my balls itch from fear. If you need help with the ladies in the meantime, i’ll take them off your hands…
This reads like a scene from “Evil Dead II.”
The same thing happened to me once! Except I didn’t hit myself in the balls, since I don’t have any. Wow, who would’ve thunk there would be two like us out in the world?
My brother once fell asleep on his back, with his arm under his head so that his head was resting on his forearm. The arm went totally to sleep. Then, in his sleep, he turned his head so that his cheek was resting on his own hand (which he couldn’t feel). He woke up screaming from the feeling of “someone else’s” cold, dead hand touching his face. We still give him shit about this. 
ChrisP - you give “self abuse” an entirely new meaning. 
Well, I think self-abuse is intentional, correct?
That’s hillarious, but I feel really bad for you on that part. Ever have it where only one toe falls asleep, and it messes up your gait?
Um no, but since I have huge feet and and toes, it would definitely mess with me for a little while, anyways.