You see that little stick by the steering wheel? That’s an indicator. Using it gives other drivers an indication of where you’re going to go next. It stops us from having to brake really heavily. Do you see what I’m driving at? Good!
Now, you see those dotted lines along the road? They’re show you where the lanes are. Lanes are designed to keep the cars driving parallel - it stops them from bumping into each other. Clever, aren’t they!
You know when I stop and allow an old lady to cross the road? I’m stopping for the old lady. Sometimes, I might stop to let you pull out, and you’re quite welcome to pull out when I do so. But when I stop for the old lady, I’m stopping for her, not for you. You might run her over! Then your insurance would be screwed. And that would be bad.
I hope that gets things clear in your mind. I know these are trivial issues, and they don’t really affect you, because you’re all important and so on, but if you have a few spare minutes in between meetings, maybe you can give them some thoughts.
I have noticed that most people that drive Mercedes are assholes and drive like crap. People that drive Audis generally have the same problem. I can’t decide if these cars are more attrative to assholes. It can’t be the price, because Porsche drivers are generally very couteous.
What I find is that the drivers of Mercedes are usually snotty old women with big big sunglasses and fur coats or ol’ stogie smokin’ fat men with sweat problems, rather than the sleek, dark haired fast living German men that I like to picture behind the wheel.
So if we just eliminate the Mercs, we’ll cut down drastically on
lack of turn signal use, erratic lane changes, and road idiocy in general?
Sounds reasonable.
I know this is all in good fun, but I couldn’t resist thinking that if the OP was about a crappier line of vehicle, someone would come in here screaming about how they themselves have a (insert crappy model here), they are not poor drivers, and that the OP is a car-ist.
Well, at the risk of coming off as a car-ist, I have to say that I agree with the OP. I too have noticed that many of the guys who are driving expensive luxury type vehicles are often inconsiderate toward other motorists. People who drive Mercedes, Lexus, BMW, Porsche, etc. don’t let me MERGE, give me the FINGER, and don’t give pedestrians the right-of-way.
Now, here’s the question. Why are people who drive expensive cars rude and inconsiderate? The conventional wisdom is that they let their money get to their heads and become jerks. WRONG. It’s because people who are rude and inconsiderate jerks are REWARDED in our capitalist society, they get the high-paying jobs. They were jerks long before they ever got their cars.
In 1998 I just came home one day with a 420 SEL, which my wife promptly labelled the “Pretentia-mobile.”
She was a little miffed that I had traded in a perfectly serviceable vehicle and spent a considerable portion of our net worth on a silver Nazi, but I felt that it was important to me.
What that really meant didn’t become apparent to me for about 6 months.
I then figured out that my motivations in getting the car were the same as if I had just gotten big sign that said “Mr. Big Stuff,” and carried it around with me.
The car was unreliable and not particularly fun to drive. There was something about it that made you feel like you about oppressing the proletariat or something.
After a year I traded it in for a used Sebring Convertible that was fun, practical, reliable, and unpretentious.
Ummm… SL owner checking in. If anything I’ve noticed most Merc owners are pretty sedate on the road. Many cars have mechanical characteristics that encourage a certain type of driving. It’s the BMWs that I see torquing over on two wheels for a lane change, mainly because they handle so beautifully. Volvo owners putt, just like I did in my old GL. Porsche and Corvette owners are amazingly reserved considering the potential, as just doing the speed limit in them is enough of a thrill. I had a '69 Vette and I was one of the slowest guys on the road…usually. Pick-up owners want to buttfuck your bumper because the size and security a 3 1/2 ton behemoth affords makes you more brazen than the Yugo driver next to you. Yeah, just when it seems drivers can be categorized by car type and once I’m convinced of the stereotype, someone will come along and blow it for me.
Fact is, if someone’s an asshole in a Mercedes, he’d be just as big an asshole in most any other performant vehicle. I’m sorry someone was rude to you. I’m trying hard to mend that image.
Actually, I’ve felt the same thing about Cadillac drivers due to 2 incidents early in my driving career. Let me tell you, folks, there’s nothing like driving down the Pennsylvania Turnpike in a Geo convertible, with the top down, a Jersey barrier on the left, 2 trucks on the right, a truck ahead of you, and an idiot in a Cadillac behind you who wants to go faster!
I’m sorry, coming so quickly in the shadow of Esprix’s Masterpiece of a traffic rant, I can’t give this more than a 4.5. Good effort, but falls short on technical merit.
I drive a Porsche Boxster and I have to agree with this. Plus, it’s probably not the best idea to drive like you own the road in such a small car. I don’t want to test the strength of the rollbar or Porsche’s assertion that the windshield frame can support the whole weight of the car.
I will attest that the Boxster is a hell of a lot of fun to drive. I did worry about looking pretentious, but the constant enjoyment of driving has led me to not give a flying fuck what people think. Actually I was more worried about looking like a spoiled kid (I’m 23) whose parents bought me the car, though it’s not true.
I’ve got a rusty dented full-size '84 Jeep J-10 pickup with a set of marine air horns mounted on the hood. If people fail to notice my behemoth-ness, it’s quite amazing how quickly a toot of those horns rectify the situation.
FWIW, I’ve never noticed Mercedes drivers being particularly obnoxious.
