Here’s the deal. You know the rules. If you have something to add to the topic, then add it in an appropriate manner. If you don’t, then keep quiet. You don’t get to decide what topics other people post about. You may not to re-hash this topic but 2 pages of other posters apparantly would.
I don’t really care if people consider me a “misogynist” or “dick” or “fratguy” or “douchebag” or whatever based on other things I may have posted in the past, but neither I, nor anyone else has posted anything intentionally insulting towards you or anyone else in this thread. So I think we would all appreciate it if you take your crazy somewhere else and stop threadshitting.
Now the way I see it, there is some middle ground between “hey I was cleaning out my wallet and found this number and did we sleep together” and being a clingy puppy dog. I mean if the date goes well can I confidently be like “You know what? I had a good time tonight and I think you did too. I would like to take you out for at least one more date and see if that goes well. And I want to do it next Thursday at 8pm. And if I misread the date, well, it was pleasent meeting you and I guess I’ll see you around.”?
I don’t think you can though. Because no one wants to get ‘locked in’ and look like the sucker who actually wants to date the other person.
If you think I’m in error, report me. You don’t like my opinion? In a forum called In My Opinion?
I think it’s silly for other posters to rehash this topic again, too. But I understand that they are trying to get through someone’s thick skull about what constitutes behavior that gets you a second date and one that gets you put in the reject pile.
So I feel like being snarky today. What of it? You have now told me to keep quiet, that I’m not normal, and that in fact I am crazy. But I’m not supposed to respond in kind?
Fine, let me air my opinion clearly for you. I think that anyone that whines about how ‘nice guys’ are maltreated are idiots.
That is my opinion.
Moreover, you misread the article you posted and it does not relate to your premise.
I’m struggling with this issue right now. I met a guy online. We’ve gone out twice. And well, to me he seems a little too caught up in me and our proto relationship. Despite that he has some positives working for him, the sensation that I’m dealing with a “nice guy” is nagging me.
In our first set of email exchanges, I failed to reply to an email he sent within a couple of days. Instead of hanging back and showing that he has better things to worry about than sweating me, he sent a anxious sounding follow-up asking me if I was disinterested in him. Even though this turned me off, I let it go and sent him an email telling him sorry that I’ve been too busy to talk.
Both times we’ve agreed to go out, he has sent me evite calendar reminders the day before. Why does this bother me? I dunno, it just does. Makes me think he’s doing this so there’s no excuses for me to stand him up because “I even sent you a reminder!” And also, it gives the impression that a date is not a simple deal for him. Having a cup of tea at a nearby coffee shop is not appointment book material, in my mind. Chill.
Last Fri, after our second date, I thanked him for the good time and casually suggested that maybe we could meet for dinner the following week. On Monday he texts me “So when’s dinner? Are we eating at your place or do you want to go out?” It’s such a petty thing to confess annoyance over, I know (and annoyance is too strong of a word). But I don’t like feeling as if a guy is breathing down my neck. He’s just almost doing that.
The thing is, the guy is intelligent and physically attractive and we have things we can talk about. This is why I’m still seeing him (we have plans for tonight…and yes he sent a reminder about it). I think chemistry is not an impossibility. I really really want to like this guy and see things through. But he’s doing things that are not lighting my fire and in fact, are doing the opposite.
Jesus Christ, if you think she’s threadshitting then report the post and STFU. Whining and trying to slap her wrists like a pinched junior mod is dragging out the alleged threadshitting and detracting from the subject at hand.
How completely and utterly chickenshit of you. If you want to call her a cunt then call her one, don’t make some stupid post like a 10 year old that just learned to swear and link to it.
Personally I think the word cunt is hilarious, but it’s even funnier that you flop it out there over something so mild. You’re a peach.
I find it interesting that you spent so much time fixating on his communication style and not how the dates went. Is he interesting? Does he make you laugh? Do you share similar interests?
The way I see it, if you like someone, you look forward to their calls and messages. If not, it’s like an annoying coworker asking for a TPS report. It seems to me that if you have to talk yourself into liking the guy, you probably don’t. There doesn’t have to be a reason.
Oh yes, how ironic that I point out how you’ve commented more than once to her about her threadshitting. Have your say if you have to, but MOVE ON. M-O-V-E O-N.
I had my say at you, Jr Boy, and reported your comment. I took my own advice.
Now be a good little labrador and come right back and give me more to laugh at. Come on, good boy!
I have to say, it’s hilarious that there are men posting in the “nice guys finish last because women are so mean” thread to call women assholes and cunts. Obviously trying very hard to exclude them from the dreaded category of the thread title. You guys win the thread!
Oh please. How was my post any worse than her first 3, all of which were unprovoked? Telling someone they’re threadshitting is not junior modding, and I was perfectly in line for pointing it out.
Its possible she isn’t fixated at all - and just using this little twitch to illustrate the thought process of a woman deciding how many dates to stick it out for. Will this get worse? Better? Become a quirk she can live with given his other good qualities? Something that in a date or two she can bring up and he’ll stop? Cause her to go crazy bitch and scream “back the fuck off” one evening?
But she’s spending just as much time wondering if he always smells so good. If he would like the song she is listening to on her iPod. If his friends are nice people.
She wasn’t bugging me that much. I was pointing out that a couple people in the thread took exception to her posts. I shouldn’t have spoken for them and used the word asshole, but jerk would have sufficed. She’s since clarified her position, and quite well at that.
If you want to see out of line, look at Sleeps with Butterflies responses to me. She came out guns blazing as though I had set her hair on fire, then engaged in the exact same behavior she was taking exception with. I’m still scratching my head over the hostility there.
[Official Moderator Warning]I think irony is you getting an official warning about your behavior while complaining about the postings of others in IMHO. If you have trouble with either pushing the “Report this post to the Moderator” button or keeping your attacks in The BBQ Pit, perhaps you should refrain from posting in this forum.[/Official Moderator Warning]