Anti-gay republican gets DUI after leaving gay nightclub

Story here

Not really a pit - just a laugh.

Why do these stories tickle me so?

And before the conservatives come out to chastise me as a typical “librul”, I’m not anti-republican - just anti-hypocrite. I’d post the same thing if he were a democrat.

I hate it when stereotypes / tropes are true. The hard core anti-gay guys who are gay themselves, just in denial due to our culture. I have seen it enough times in my personal life, and I wonder just how messed up it makes a person to bury their true identity for so long.

I feel for his family. I pity him.

Another one bites the dust. :smiley:

heh. Caught with a “male companion” - and he did it in a state vehicle too. Not too bright…

Who could look at his picture and not think he’s gay?

I wonder if they are in denial or just cynically play the part of rabid anti-gay person because it gets them into office and keeps them there.

Good question. The one that I knew in college never ran for office - he was simply hard core anti gay and quite active and open about his beliefs. I lost track of him, and lo and behold he came out, has a partner, registered Democrat and calls himself liberal. A true 180 degree switch in every part of his persona.

They play the parts to their families as well, or are they all in on the gag?

Please don’t forget that along with the hyprocracy, he was also pulled over under suspicion of DUI.

Ahh, sweet, sweet justice.

it would just be too funny if the DUI wasn’t for alcohol in the blood, but poppers.

You can still go with the cynical thing on this.

Politicians are better off with a wife and kids…especially if you are selling the wholesome, family values schtick to get voted in.

I seriously doubt any woman would knowingly sign up for that but it is hard to imagine he was just in denial and had no clue about the person he was when he did all this.

If nothing else it became apparent to him somewhere down the road, after he got married, but he continued to play the part despite being the very thing he claims to despise.

“How could I be drunk *or *gay, I just had four or five cosmos… D’OH!”

I am troubled by his apology:

What exactly are the “actions” that he is apologising for? Visiting a gay bar? Driving while drunk? Having a male friend in the car? Only the second is (IMHO) worth apologising for, unless you think that being gay is a sin or a crime, or he was having an adulterous relationship with his companion.

What I cannot picture is what such a person says to himself.

I mean, I can’t be the only person with an internal dialog, right? Not a conversation, as such, but just thinking about what you’re doing, playing out what-if scenarios, planning the next steps of your day/week/life. Right?

So we have a guy who, to give him the benefit of every doubt, is married, with kids, so he must have self-identified as straight at some point. He must have not been so repulsed with straight sex that he can’t bring himself to bang his wife every now and again. But equally, he must know that he has, or wants to have, gay sex.

Even if he could make himself just not think about it… what does he do when he’s DONE it? I mean, he’s picked up a guy and had sex with him. Now it’s the next day… what does he tell himself? How does he reconcile the life he’s living with that action?

I suspect I can answer my own question for time #1: “It was a one-time thing. I was drunk/under pressure/wanted to experiment.” Whatever. He can tell himself it will never happen again.

But after multiple times, he can’t tell himself that anymore.

So how does he live with himself?

I believe they’re a bunch of deeply-closeted nut jobs. They know they’re gay, and I’d imagine they all deal with this realization differently. Some of the crazier ones may chalk it up to Satan and make efforts to suppress their gayness, while others might admit, “Nope, no Satan. I’m just a queer, but that won’t get me elected, so let me stork up some broad.” I’d just find it hard to imagine they would admit this to anyone other than themselves and their boy toys. But hey, maybe their wives are in on this too. Sham marriages aren’t a new concept.

Visiting a gay bar when (presumably) he told his wife he was hard at work on some important legislative business, perhaps. In other words, he seems to be apologizing for the extended lie he lived.

Look, I don’t think we should just jump to conclusions here. Isn’t it just as likely that he went to the gay nightclub to preach about how homosexuality is a sin and offered to take anyone who would repent over to a camp to that turns gays into straights.
One person took him up on the offer and the other gays, in what could only be described as a hissy fit, spiked Mr. Ashburn’s water and called the cops on him when he left.

You see, I’m not a gambling man. But if you asked me to place odds, I’d say the above scenario makes a heck of a lot more sense than some guy who’s rabidly anti-gay being all Liberace McQueeny in his spare time. I mean, who’s ever heard of THAT happening?

Well, either he believes the anti-gay line that he pushes publicly as a politician – or he doesn’t, and says to himself, “I have to appear anti-gay to get elected, especially as a Republican, but in my heart I know that there’s nothing wrong with being gay.”

I suspect that the first alternative is more soul-destroying.

There are guys who think just because you have sex with a man on occasion it doesn’t make you gay.

I’m not making that up.