All the calls for ‘social distancing’ don’t seem to be working. Whenever I’m forced to go out to where other people are, at least one person gets unnecessarily close.
So I have pioneered ‘anti-social distancing’.
I fake a coughing fit.
That backs them right the hell off!
This ain’t gonna turn out well for you, Rich, Man!
fart
Coughing is not illegal.
I challenge anyone to prove that it wasn’t just my history as a smoker catching up with me.
I will do whatever it takes to get the asshole that’s behind me in line, breathing down my neck, to respect boundaries.
After all, as far as I know, I might have IT and I could be infecting him.
Just saying “back off, don’t you know the new rules” doesn’t seem to work. Some assholes need a reminder of why.
I hope you get an orange jumpsuit.
At the pharmacy today there were, taped to the floor, little blue boxes carefully placed at six foot intervals. How hard is that to understand?
Apparently a bit too hard for the asshole behind me. I got him to retreat to a reasonable distance.
I count that as a win.
The posters that seem to think that I should be arrested are, apparently, laboring under a misapprehension.
I did not cough on anyone or anything.
Again, I cough fairly often. I always cover my mouth and keep it to myself. Nothing has changed. I just fake a cough when some idiot gets right up close to me for no good reason.
Take a chill pill! Why hate on a simple and non-violent way of getting morons to obey reason?
Did you really come here and expect people to think your story was cute? Because I gotta say, that is world-class tone-deaf.
What do you have against social distancing?
We’re you that asshole behind me at Walgreens today?
How about you just voluntarily back the fuck off?
I promise to never cough on you if you just go away.
Just flash your gun.
I’m not quite that anti-social. Yet. (Joke)
Now it’s gonna be even harder for you to enter the kingdom of heaven.
I, absolutely honestly, would love an explanation of this comment. I really just don’t get it. And I like to think of myself as a pretty smart guy.
p.s. Children, there is no Heaven or Hell. That’s what we call a ‘myth’.
You’re welcome.
It would be easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than it would be to explain that joke.
On the other hand, a needle wielded by a rich man has no trouble going through the eye of a camel.
Oh, I get it. I wasn’t thinking in terms of my username. Good shot!
I don’t really see the problem. A cough is a lot less confrontational than direct confrontatiom, and less like to result in them getting resentful and getting closer.
You’re dealing with at best someone who forgot, and at worst a home rible asshole. If they need a reminder about why we’re social distancing, I don’t see why a cough is such a bad thing.
We all have to protect ourselves. If someone is not keeping the current social contract, they deserve such a reminder.
It’s nothing at all like those assholes who fake having the virus to terrorize people.
BigT. I love the term ‘current social contract’. Well said.