Any dopers ever cook a turducken. How did you like it?
Jeez, who has that much time?
How 'bout one hour at 2025° F!!!
Sigh PIMF -
I’ll ask a mod to move it.
I’ve never cooked one myself, but friends of mine from Louisiana make it every so often and I’ve tried theirs.
It’s good, but frankly it’s better for bragging rights. IMO, it wouldn’t be worth the effort to make one myself.
I’m gonna move this to the Cafe Society.
While I’ve cooked a turkey, a duck, and a chicken, I did them separately, not one stuffed inside the others. I suspect that my cat would absolutely ADORE this dish, though.
… and it was delicious. The hardest part was deboning everything so it looked nice and neat. I started with the chicken and worked my way backward, thinking that if I messed up it would be hidden anyway… by the time I got to the turkey my method was pretty good. It did take a long time, but I cooked mine overnight, just set my alarm clock to go off a few times in the night so I could check on it and bail out the grease. It made ALOT of grease, course there wasn’t much room for drippings of any kind since it took up alot of space in my roasting pan. The fact that one of my stuffings contained sausage probably did not help. Worth the effort IMO.
I’ve eaten one, but never cooked one myself. The duck was mighty gamey–the chicken and turkey tasted great. My uncle bought it from someplace and you got to choose three different stuffings. We had shrimp, gator tail, and traditional stuffing.
Bah. A chicken in a duck in a turkey? You young folks don’t know what real cooking is. In my day, we’d cook a quail in a chicken in a duck in a goose in a turkey in an ostrich. Stuffed with shrimp. With a delicate lemon glaze seasoned with just a hint of thyme. Took three weeks to cook, and and fed 374 people.
Only 374 people? What, were you dieting?
Why you lazy kids, with your modern micro-oven waves and fancy-schmancy electrical refrigeration. Why in MY day, back in Kenya, we’d take sixteen gallon drums of cooked rice and force feed them to two gazelles, then we’d debone them and stuff them inside a deboned rhinocerous, which was stuffed inside a deboned pregnant elephant. We’d roast the whole durn abonination over a sixty foot spit and have twenty of our village’s greatest warriors dive down from a precipice with vines tied around their ankles and spears in their mouths so they could BASTE the animal with palm wine and peanut oil. Took thirty nine hours to cook, six more to cool off, and none of the 800 guests could even get a taste until after the first three hours of ceremonial dancing and praisesongs to the king. And that was the just appetizer on Mondays.
Turducken, furschmucken. You ain’t lived till you had roast gazrhinophant.
Well, if you’re looking to feed a couple more people and are up for a bit more of a challenge, you can always graduate to this recipe.
I’ve cooked one.
However, I didn’t make it: I paid a butcher to make it for me. The deboning would seem to be a palaver way way beyond my abilities, or indeed those of most people I know.
I didn’t cook it for 9 hours; more like 5 or 6. I glazed the outer turkey with a cranberry coulis.
To be honest it was a bit of a disappointment - the fats and juices all mingled during the cooking, and made the flavour nothing more than ‘some kind of poultry’.
Number Six & Askia, you are gods among Dopers!
I would never eat anything whose name contains “turd.”.
Add 5 pounds of pepper? :eek:
You mustard.
If anyone has seen the Thanksgiving episode of The Bob Newhart Show, I’m sure you’ll immediately think “We’ll use 4 ovens!” 
Anyway, we tried cooking one the first year John Madden introduced it at halftime, sans recipe. Needless to say it didn’t work. But we shall try again.
Now to get Jerry to order more moo-goo-gai-pan!
“Knock, knock!”
“Who’s there?”
“Don’t cry!”
A client gave us a turducken a couple of Christmases ago. I thought it was disappointing. It took forever to cook – about three hours longer than the instructions stipulated – and the whole thing had kind of a “reheated” flavor. Thank God we had enough Veuve-Clicquot to sustain us until the damn thing was out of the oven. I’d still like to try assembling my own sometime, though I can’t imagine the whole being greater than the sum of its parts.
For those of you who prefer seafood, I suggest a blue whale stuffed with a right whale stuffed with a whale shark (or orca, if you prefer) stuffed with a tuna stuffed with a skate wrapped around a seal stuffed with a grouper stuffed with an Emperor penguin stuffed with several bluefish stuffed with mackerel stuffed with scallops wrapped in mussels (deshelled, of course). Place in a steel tank over a bed of red-hot coals; cover with seaweed, then a tarp, then sand. Let steam for, oh, three or four days. Garnish with lobsters and serve with 55-gallon drums of melted butter.
No goldfish or guppies? :eek:
Man, your recipe sucks hairy donkey balls! Which is what that dish would taste like sans goldies and guppies. :wally
EddyFreddyTeddy – What the HELL? What is this hoity-toity New Age crapollarama you’re feeding folks? Any shipshape seaman worth his south seas salt knows you can’t stuff whalemeat with deshelled mussels with Emperor Penguins with lobsters and STEAM 'em. Hell, a sumptuous selection of seafood such as this oughta properly be DEEP-FRIED. Start with a metric ton of fish-and chips batter to cover the meat. For the frying, I recommend use of a gutted double-hulled iron oil-taker, quarter-filled with fresh canola oil (gotta make sure them canolas is ripe), quarter-filled with whale blubber (sperm’s my preference, if you got it, and I already heard the jokes, so shove it, mate). 'Course, you’ll need six-eight-ten Eskimo cooks to cook it. Give ‘em all machetes, and have ‘em dice the meat in coconut sized chunks. Make sure the oil’s red hot before they spear the meat with harpoons. Hint: If you spit a loogie in the oil and it skitters around the top a-poppin’ and a-hoppin’ before it evaporates, it’s probably hot enough.
The rest is okay, though, except I’d add a little fresh chopped garlic with the butter. Don’t be stingy with the rum.