LU had the perfect Red Wedding in Green.
Johnny Mundo had his World Wiyeeed Underground cohorts with him backstage, and Mundo’s old tag team partner from WWE, Joey Mercury, will be his best man! Only he cannot use that name, so they borrowed Johnny Gargano’s nickname and deemed him Joey Wrestling. I guess LU had to sign some consent form with WWE to use him. Who knows how much legal rambling they had to execute for 5 minutes of air time? Anyhoo, that dashed Ricky Mundo’s hopes of being best man, and the WWU made it clear Ricky and his creepy doll would stay as lowly ring bearer and NOT be considered “party of the groom.”
Last week, Ricky killed WWU’s old shady lawyer when he tried to get backstage to talk to Mundo. That’s the thing with LU. They know how to kill off lingering storylines.
So, Ricky and creepy doll had a little discussion, and she piped “You know what you have to do!” I think creepy doll’s voice is Famous B’s valet The Beautiful Brenda aka Holly Meowy. Ricky found a pair of bolt cutters and proceeded to the temple basement. He approached Matanza’s cell and cut off the chain that was secured to the cell door. Ricky then ran away, and Matanza Cobb let out a King Kong roar.
Famous B, still in the wheelchair, acts as minister to the wedding. Taya’s bridal party includes Holly Meowy and a burly chick whose name I didn’t catch, which doesn’t matter because [spolier alert] she’s a casualty. Famous B asks for the two lovebirds to exchange vows. Taya gushes, says how cool Johnny is, while Johnny responds she’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, because looking at her is like looking at a reflection of himself.
Famous B asks if anyone object sto the wedding, speak now or forever hold your peace … no, it wasn’t Matanza who crashed the party, but rather Antonio Cueto, with the dead eye and corpse hair. Meowy squeaks “Aw, it’s Grandpa!” Cueto announces he has a gift for the lovely couple, and caterers bring out tables topped with … tacos. Is that racist? I get the feeling it’s racist, but in an ironic sense.
It’s time for the rings, which Ricky presents, and is then told to go away. Famous B finally gets to the last line: “I now declare you man and WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?” Now Matanza crashes the party. He fights off WWU, then brutally headbutts Taya, resulting in her face being covered in The Crimson Mask. Mat then chokeslams the aforementioned burly bridesmaid through the taco table. Taya comes back, mad as hell, and slaps Matanza. This gets her pulverized. Ricky Mundo is seen in the audience laughing. Finally, Mat sees Famous B in his wheelchair and bodyslams him, wheels included. Then he chokeslams Mrs. Mundo into the wedding cake.
The audience chants This Is Awesome!