When my mom was in her 80s, I walked in one day and she was wachng an infomercial for exercise bikes of something. I asked why she was watching such things. She said because they never break for commercials, she is so tired of all those darned commercial breaks.
I’ve sat and watched, with great delight, those late night hour-long ads for old song collections. But now that there is YouTube, I’m much more jaded about nostalgia.
Yeah. I like the way they take a simple task like, I dunno, mopping a floor and turn it into a huge pin in the ass “the old way.” People struggle and slosh water on the floor, and hurt their back… and then along comes Swiffer.
Suddenly the floor mopper is dressed up nicely, smiling and finishing the task at hand in no time.
My favourite right now is the replacement for the Magic Bullet blender: it’s now an extractor. Yes siree, it pulverizes the food at 5,000 RPMs and breaks down cell walls so you get more nutritional value out of the food you’re pulverizing.
Ya, right. I’m pretty sure your stomach doesn’t care if your smoothie is the consistency of pea soup or water.
I usually HATE infomercials. But over the years, I’ve found a handful of them highly entertaining or even fascinating, even when they were pitching products I would never buy.
Decades ago, I loved Dick Butkus’ infomercial for the mini barbecue grill that burned newspaper. I even sat through a 39 minute ad for hand-hammered woks from China.
A diamond company here in SA runs a half-hour infomercial during Sat and Sun afternoons. You can see a sample here: Americus Diamond San Antonio - YouTube
I used to stop and enjoy the surrealness of Shop Erotic, a late night weekend infomercial/QVC style program where two non-threateningly attractive women would chat in glowing terms about the material quality and aesthetics of sex toys and let you know that it’s an amazing deal for only $69.99 down from $89.99. You can find clips of it on YouTube (probably NSFW although its beauty is its bland sterility) but sadly they only have one of the host pairs; there was at least 2-3 others who would rotate. I don’t remember the channel it would come up on but it was one of the basic cable networks like USA, TBS, etc.
I used to love watching the various Magic Bullet infomercials (there were three or four of them, I think), starring Mick and Mimi, who couldn’t resist showing off their latest Magic Bullet kitchen gadget whenever they had friends over.
I was really crushed the day I learned that not only were Mick and Mimi not really married, they weren’t even really a couple!
My dad was agnostic/atheist/not religious, but he loved listening to Billy Graham, Kathryn Kuhlman, and a few others like them for reasons similar to the infomercial watchers.
In my market, thankfully, there’s always something else on, even if it’s a rerun of My Mother, the Car.
I only watch late-night TV in the break room during the half-hour I get for lunch (I don’t always get to change the channel, because people). I get annoyed by the disclaimers the stations show right before an infomercial starts, saying that the station isn’t responsible for claims made during the “program.” Don’t tell me who isn’t responsible; tell me who IS, doofus! Or raise your standards on the advertising content you’ll accept, so you don’t seem like you’re ashamed to have people associate your station with the product.
Not infomercials, but I can get positively mesmerized by HSN, QVC and the like and I think it’s probably a similar experience. There’s something about those cheesy, French manicured, acrylic nails busily pointing out all the highlights of the featured product that I find hypnotic.
Was the wok one the one with the British guy? “At this time, you can add a little wine…you can add a LOT of wine–It’s YOUR wok!” Some college friends of mine and I would drunkenly watch that one and the little chunky lady that sold those sandwich makers over and over.