My keys reside in my right front trousers pocket except when they’re being used. The only time I have ever lost them was the one time I sat them down on my desk and an evil 9th grader stole them. That was in 1984- I never laid my keys down anywhere after that and therefore have never lost them!
We once “lost” our keys from our foyer after my wife invited in a couple of door to door salesmen who wanted to “help” us lower our energy bill.
I completely freaked the hell out because those two scumbags obviously pocketed our keys to come back later and rob us blind.
A couple of hours later, while I was feverishly devising a strategy for blocking the doors with lumber, my wife found the keys in my son’s car seat.
My advice is to measure twice, and cut only after checking the car seat.
I misplaced a set of house keys last year. Okay, outright lost them as I couldn’t find them anywhere. I didn’t panic because I was pretty sure they were in the house, & even if they were lost outside somewhere there’s no identification on them to know they’re keys to my house. I had another set so it wasn’t even an issue of not being able to get into the house (or mailbox). Eventually gave up looking for them, figured I’d find them when I move…someday.
Found them not that long ago, in my bedroom, in the drawer, under the winter (fleece-lined) jeans. :smack:
OK, so I posted the same thing in this thread nearly four years apart. Curious.
I heartily endorse this. Not just keys, but also everything important I carry. Nothing leaves my pocket unless it’s being used, then it immediately goes back. My wife gives me some flak about it, but it works. I never lose them. Even at night they stay in my pants pockets until I get dressed in the morning, when they go straight from yesterday’s pants to today’s pants.
I always put some kind of container right next to the door for keys, sunglasses, purses, and whatever goes with me most of the time. When I lose keys (when, not if), they are in the lock, in a coat pocket, in a pocket of the purse (because Mr. CelticKnot was driving and opened the door), in the wrong pocket of the purse, or dropped somewhere else because I needed to get to the bathroom and didn’t have time to put everything away properly.
Thankfully, I have never lost them permanently. Yet.
Bolding mine.
Every single time I’ve lost my keys in the house its been because I forgot to take them out of my pants pocket at night and threw the pants in the hamper.
Waaaay back in the covered wagon days, when my kids were toddlers, I was in one those always-frantic circumstances where we had to leave RIGHT THIS MINUTE. The kids were dressed, coated, clean. The diaper bag was packed, I had the necessary babas, I had my coat on, purse in hand…and I could not find the GODDAMNED keys!
The previous Christmas Mr VOW had given me the latest gizmo: a keyring that makes a noise when you clap your hands. I put my keys on it and used it, only to make Mr VOW happy. I couldn’t see ever using it.
Mainly because it was a pain in the butt to use! Mere clapping didn’t work. The claps had to be spaced JUST so. We spent an entire afternoon practicing claps. The instructions said to mentally recite “one potato, two potato…” to gauge the claps. Despite the practice, it was a hit or miss thing.
So, here I am with two fidgity kids, running late, and I’m rushing from room to room clapping, while muttering, “One potato, two potato…”
Success! The keyring bleeped, I got the keys, threw kids and accoutrements in the car, and went on my way.
Only time I ever used it. But boyoboy, am I glad it worked that one time!
~VOW
Not my house keys, but I lost my spare car key. I think it’s probably in the house somewhere. I’m trying very hard not to do that again, because it cost too much for a new key and remote. 
My wife is notable for losing her keys or her e-cig. She no longer even tries looking for them…she just finds me and tells me which one she lost. I may be bragging a bit, but I must say that I am excellent at finding them.
I check the “usual suspects” (couch cushions, down the side of her car seat, all counter tops, the laundry basket, etc.) first, then move on to more obscure places. One trick I have is to use a powerful flashlight to help me check under the table, chairs, and other places. A flashlight also helps because items cast a noticeable shadow if you hold the light parallel to a surface. I haven’t been beaten yet.
Hire yourself out! Start a whole new industry! Train others in your method!
Your potential is enormous!
~VOW
Oh, I’ve lost a couple sets. Now I always keep them in my pants pocket, even on vacation with no car or house nearby. More secure than my cellphone.
But my favorite was in our family years ago, we lost the house spare keys, only one other set left. (Everyone was in and out at the same time so both sets were being used. Holidays, I think.)
So the keys disappear, we hunt EVERYWHERE! Overturning everything. Calling stores we were at, asking if they found any keys.
Almost a year later, we open up the den couch to a sofa bed. First time in a long time. Somehow we had bags on this hardly-used couch and the keys slipped in between the mattresses inside the stupid sofa bed. Even though we lifted the cushions and looked underneath the sofa, they loomed just inches away snuggled in the folded mattress.
I always think of the Twilight Zone episode (was it?) where elves painted and constructed each moment in time. They were in charge of reality. Sometimes they forget some details (purses, wallets, keys) but then moments later the missing item would appear where they swore they just looked. I still say, “It must be the damn elves.” 
This is not always true. A lot of times you find things in the first place that you looked for them. You just couldn’t see them because they were under a piece of paper or something.
Yes. Thank god I had two full sets because I didn’t find them for 6 months. (They had slipped off the sofa arm into a box of paper set to be recycled. I had added paper to the box without looking in it, covering them.)
I automatically ordered an extra set of keys for my new car. I have the first set. The spare set Mr.Wrekker has and the 3rd set is with my DIL. She is always near her phone because of her babies being preschool. I can always get her. I will lose my keys or lock myself out of my car. It’s a given. I think I’m allergic or magnetically challenged, maybe.