Doom is being released in Australia on 27/10 (the trailer just came on as I opened this thread) - so either it’s coming out in the US tomorrow, or we’re probably looking at a worldwide release 
"Rip and tear your guts! You are huge, which means you have HUGE GUTS! Rip and tear!
…so sayeth the Doom guy, from the 1996 Doom Comic…
http://www.doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/
http://www.doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/comic.php
Be warned, it is very, VERY BAD…
Perhaps you should have a read of this.
I haven’t yet, it’s too long and I’m sleepy.
I see it as a retelling of The Secret Life of Walter Middy. Drew is a poor, put-upon husband. He has to take his kids to the soccer game. (Cue Duke fantasy based on soccer game.) He has to check into a hotel. (Cue Duke fantasy based on a hotel.)
And so on.
Apparently it’s dreadful. (Massive spoilers!)
That’s clever. (Though it’s “Walter Mitty”.)
Didn’t know that stuff about “Duke Nukem” and unauthorized dialogue. Thanks for crushing a boy’s dreams.
The funniest fan modification of “Doom” I recall was replacing the final monster with Barney the Dinosaur (complete with song).
I’m guessing that the movie will suck. The Rock, in my prediction, will be the best thing about the movie - IF he doesn’t try to act tough and serious. Maybe he can reprise the gay cowboy bodyguard role he played in Be Cool.
Boy, did that comic suck.
MISSED? With a BFG? :dubious:
I disagree. It may be one of the greatest things I’ve ever read- and I’m only on the first panel of the second page.
I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again.
DOOM will be the cinematic equivalent of a donkey punch: painful, humiliating, and perfectly capable of lowering your IQ by about 10 points.
Sounds like they’re shooting for “so bad it’s good”.
Re the Doom comic
Now, that I’ve read the whole thing, I can see what they were thinking. The comic actually works well if you imagine the soldier being played by (not surprisingly) Bruce Campbell. He begins as ridiculously over the top while on the beserker pack. Then he transitions to tweaked subtle parody of action hero. When he makes the environmental speech, he starts with a stoic voice and a single manly tear. He becomes increasingly overwrought. By the time he says “Oh, the humanity!” he’s on his knees sobbing uncontrollably weeping truly excessive amounts of tears while great rivers of snot come from his nose. Then he sees the gun, asbently wipes the back of his hand across his face, stands up and is instantly composed again.
“My cause is just, my will is strong… and my gun is very very large!”
They made that movie. It was called Soldier, and it was shite. Urinal drinking could only have improved it, but all we got was an old lady giving him a nice woolly scarf as a consolation for being exiled.
It’s completely brilliant! “Ahh! Chainsaw! The great communicator!”
“Allow me to communicate to you my desire to have your guns! Brrrummmm!”
Every panel a sig line!
If the movie were half as funny as the comic, it would be a masterpiece.
After reading that comic, I feel like Jacob must have felt, as he wrestled with God at the foot of a giant ladder that ascended into heaven with angels going up and down. Or something. I’m not sure what I’m talking about, but that comic is gold.
Was this Doom comic the one I’ve heard rumors about, wherein the Marine grumbles that he’d like to give the demons “a lemon-flavored suppository” with his rocket launcher?
The comic is hilarious, though his bloodstain on his hand keeps changing sides, and then disappears entirely.
If the movie is half as good as that comic, then all my hopes and desires about it will be fulfilled.
“At this particular moment in time, I don’t believe I have a healthier or more deeply felt respect for any object in the universe than this here shotgun.”