So now that I’m back and plan to post with more regularity, I thought I’d bring back the Bullet Reviews if anyone is interested. For those who aren’t familiar with the concept, I love movies and will watch just about anything. The idea is, if there’s a movie (for rental, not at the theater and not made for TV) that you’re unsure if you want to watch yourself, I’ll watch it for you (taking the bullet, hence “Bullet Review”). I’ll then post what I thought of the film in detail, spoiling any spoilers and generally spewing any vitriol for having had to watch what is usually a very bad film.
Here’s links to the previous reviews for anyone who may want to get an idea of my writing style when it comes to this sort of thing:
Ankle Biters - a film about midget vampires
Battlefield Earth - famous flop
Hudson Hawk - not as bad as its reputation
Crossroads (with Brittany Spears) - stick to the bubble-gum music Brittany, stay out of bubble-gum cinema
Exorcist II - great cast, great director, what went wrong? Oh… the script.
So I need more movies to watch. The rules are simple: The movies must be available on DVD or VHS. No porn. That’s it, the only rules I can think of. So do you want to know why Cutthroat Island is the biggest flop of all time? Is Ishtar really that bad? Why didn’t Batman and Robin ruin George Clooney’s career? Did the Scooby Doo movie really need a sequel?!
You can even take the high road if you want. Not sure if Citizen Kane is your cup o’ tea? I’ll take on Orson Wells, he doesn’t scare me! (Cuz he’s dead now, y’see.)
So post your requests here, I’ll review them as I find them available to rent.