I am hoping someone with better music software and better skills than I have will be willing to help me. The explanation is a little long, but here goes:
My son was born in 1993. His father left me shortly after he was born. I never used to think I wanted kids; but once I had him, my whole world changed. I had read somewhere that in certain tribes of Africa, each child has his own little song composed by his mother who is given this song by God. I made one for him, and I would sing it to him, rocking him to sleep. He was so good; he never once spit up on me, and he had the most delightful baby laugh ever. I remember once when he was about two and a half, I made some delicious pesto from scratch, and served it on rotelle. We sat down on the porch to eat on a beautiful summer evening, and I handed him his bowl. The first forkful he took, he put into my mouth. That’s how he is.
When I was pregnant, I had gone to a Catholic church, and lit a candle for the Virgin Mary, and asked that my child be sincere and compassionate, the two qualities I value most highly. He has always been both of those things. When he was little, he used to get “Darth Vader” and “elevator” mixed up.
Whenever I would say, “I love you,” he’d say, “I love you more!” We were so close that, even though we loved to play 20 questions, it was almost pointless because he would guess me in 2 or 3 questions. He got excellent grades, and was recommended for the gifted program in 5th grade. We read all the Harry Potter books together at night, before bed, a chapter at a time except for at the end when it got really exciting. When my beloved cat disappeared a few days after my birthday, I was devastated, really inconsolable. I remember one day crying and crying, and he put his arms around me, and told me it was going to be okay, and he made me a cup of tea. He was only nine; I didn’t know he even knew how to make tea. (exactly how I like it, too.)
Well. Anyway. When he was 10, he went to stay with my parents for two weeks like he did every summer. During that time, my mother, who it turned out was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s, became convinced that I wasn’t coming back for him; and she went to some grandparents’ rights agency who hooked her up with a team of three lawyers, filed for “temporary emergency custody,” and applied to terminate my parental rights. Because her lawyers were associated with Legal Aid, they ouldn’t help me. (conflict of interest.) So basically, it was one freaked-out punk chick against three corporate lawyers doing pro bono work. I learned more about Family Law during that time than I hope any of you ever have to know.
I did okay, in hindsight. They weren’t able to terminate my parental rights, and we had joint legal custody. But they got physical custody, and my court-ordered visitation was two days a month, for six hours. My mom used to schedule him for all kinds of extracurricular activities on my visitation days, so I couldn’t see him. She never sent me any report cards, or told me when he was hurt … it was an awful, very painful time.
BUT we somehow stayed close anyway, and now he is 18; a beautiful, kind young man. I am so proud of him! So here’s the deal: a few years ago, on Christmas Day, I had tried to call him, and gotten his voicemail. I was really sad, but I went on to my best friend’s house for dinner because they were expecting me. A little while later I received a call from my son – he had been trying to call me at the same time! We made plans to get together soon, and I was so happy, I went home and wrote a song called, “Stoked.” It’s just a MIDI song, an instrumental, and I had only the standard Microsoft synth bank to work with.
I would really like to give him a cool version of this song this Christmas; one with good guitars and proper drums. It’s only 2:13 long. Perhaps there’s a musical Doper with a little extra time on their hands? Let me know, and I can email you an mp3.