My advice:
If you do happen to order a cocktail, the little stick they put in the drink is not a straw. It’s a stirrer.
Don’t suck your drink through your stirrer.
Right, but you have to train most bartenders to serve it correctly. In too many bars, they’ll serve good scotch and irish in a shot glass. They should properly be served in a rocks glass. In a social situation, I object to carrying a shot glass even if you’re drinking it correctly.
I’ve trained all my bartenders, but it’s a slow process. Perhaps I need to hang out in a better class of joint.
Vodka or whiskey is safe. I prefer the vodka. Purists drink it straight up, or with something on the side. Others may disapprove of anything more than water or ice. More will be said of how you behave than what you drink - unless your drink has an umbrella or fruit.
:eek:
**
Yep.
A G&T is probably your best all-purpose drink. Even the lousiest gin gets cut by the tonic water, it’s sufficiently “manly” for those who care, and it really is quite pleasant. Since I am an old fogey, a conformist, and quite pretentious I prefer a single malt or a sapphire martini.
Oh, I actually love those drinks, too. 
I have never been to a bar where sippin’ scotch gets served in a shot glass, and believe me, I’ve been to some real shitholes. I am both appalled and impressed that people would do such a thing. Even a “shot” of jack is served in a rocks glass.
I can give you a whole list of places who can’t handle this. In dive bars, my typical order is a shot of Jack and a longneck, and I’m willing to forgive them serving the Jack in a shot glass when ordered like this. However, I’ve been in some fairly high class places that put Jameson and Bushmills in shot glasses. Maybe they just don’t understand. The last time it happened, I reached behind the bar for my own rocks glass and left the tip wadded up in the empty shot glass; if they’re going to serve like it’s a dive, I’ll follow suit.
In Australia, despite the fact that we are known for our love of beer, there was a strange snobbery against this noble drink when it came to business meetings or restaurants. Especially restaurants. It had to be wine with your meal. When you consider that it’s often very hot here, and a goodly proportion of our restaurants are Asian, people finally realised this was a bit silly. Who really wants a cabernet sauvignon with their Thai green curry? Beer it is!
At a business meeting, I’d go for one of the following:
-water
-premium beer
-Scotch or other whisk(e)y -with a little water or ice if you like
-very basic whisky, gin or vodka based cocktails in a stemless or whisky glass. Stay away from brightly coloured “nighttime” cocktails in long glasses. Also keep clear of very strong cocktails such as Long Island Tea, Rusty Nails, etc.
I’d avoid wine if there is no food being served. Don’t drink anything alcoholic with Coke in it. Coke by itself is ok though.
Always make sure you go to office parties. Always make sure you don’t get drunk. You don’t want to be Joe from Accounting who, by 9:30pm, was break dancing on the bar wearing nothing but cutesy novelty socks. At work events, I normally have two beers straight off to quench the thirst and get me nice and relaxed. After that, it’s one drink per hour.
True story:
I was hired by a small (20-some people) company out of college. For my first christmas party, the CEO and the two or three VPs and I ended up doing shots all night. One of them was “the official company shot”, which was, of course, on fire.
Luckily, Mrs. CEO said that, due to my beard, I could blow it out before drinking it.
So there are always exceptions to whatever rules we come up with in this thread.
-LV