In another thread someone mentioned Oscar Wilde. According to biographers other than being an exceptional writer he was also a brilliant conversationalist. Must be wonderful to be able to express yourself so brilliantly in more than one way. Anyway, I thought about it a little and realized that I’m definately a much better conversationalist than a writer. Actually among my co-workers and friends I’ve always been considered witty and entertaining. It must be the facial expressions and body language. (People used to tell me I had a rubber face.) I know my poor boyfriend cannot tell a joke. It’s terrible. No matter how hard he tries they just fall flat, with me a least. He always laughs at himself and busts up while I just sit there. I try to tell him it’s all in the delivery.
So what about you? Do you think you’re more interesting and entertaining in person or do you feel more comfortable getting your point across in a less personal fashion, like here, in writing?
I definitely express myself better writing (though you wouldn’t necessarily know it from my posts here). I seem to have some weird short circuit in my brain that allows me to write out my opinions/feelings eloquently where in conversation I stammer and search for the right words. There have been occasions when I’ve actually written out an answer to a question a friend asked me because I couldn’t articulate it in conversation. Very strange.
I’m another one who’s generally much better at articulating my feelings and opinions in writing. Not sure why. Maybe my fingers have more stamina (typing); I can be lazy when it comes to talking, plus I’m not at all outgoing (thinking of conversations at social events here). I can be good at conversations but I really have to be in the mood for it.
I can stand in front of 200 people (I used to teach at a University), or a small gathering in a conference room, and discuss or lecture on a topic with no qualms at all. No butterflies, no stage fright. But put me in fromt of the same groups and ask me to tell a joke or relate an anecdote? Fuhgeddaboudit. I just don’t have what it takes to captivate an audience with my humor or charm.
Likewise, I can write a report, term paper, opinion essay, or similar without breaking too much of a sweat. I feel like I have a better than average grasp of what constitutes “good writing skills.” But ask me to write a short story or anything creative? Fuhgeddaboudit.
To answer the OP, I guess I would go with my writing skills over conversational. But that’s not really how I break it down when I contemplate my communication strengths vs. weaknesses.
I can tell jokes with ease. I can be funny or sarcastic or argumentative, but ask me to carry on a normal conversation and I’ll look at you like you’re crazy. I can do so much more, say so much more, get in touch with my feelings so much better when I’m writing. I can write all day what I would never be able to say in person.
This is how demented I am: The last person I liked, I actually wrote out why I liked her and e-mailed it off to her. Would it have been more effective to actually tell her in person, eye to eye? Hell yes. Could I have done that? Hell no. I get flustered in person. I get embarrassed in person. For some reason I can hand someone a note that says exactly what I feel without a second thought, but couldn’t ever bring myself to say it straight out to them.
I only shudder at the grammatical mistakes I know I’ve made in this post alone.
Definitely writing. I’m much more talkative online than I am in real life, mainly because I’m very shy. It’s much easier for me to write out what I’m feeling than to try to describe it to someone verbally.
Also, I tend to get flustered easily. When I’m speaking I sometimes stutter or lose my train of thought in mid-sentence. When I’m writing I can take my time and find the perfect words to express myself.
Now if only I could learn to talk the way I write …
I think I come across much better in person due to the way I say things and use facial expressions. I like to be sarcastic, but that doesn’t come across too well in writing.
Of course, those who know me in person might wish that I would drop them more hand-written notes than visit with me in person!
For me it’s somewhere between. I express myself best in conversational writing, like instant messaging. After that would be normal take-the-time-to-do-it-right writing, then speaking.
I don’t like to speak. I can have a conversation just fine, but I won’t initiate it, and I’m usually far too self conscious about the way I sound or what goofy expression is on my face.
I can call a business I’ve been to a couple times and they’ll recognize it’s me. I’ve stopped in stores to buy a Christmas present and the next year they remember me. It’s not that I’m an obnoxous S.O.B. either. I was told that I convey emotions when I talk to people, it’s that they remember. Yes, it’s true, I mimic peoples accents and emotions when talking about them. Don’t stand to close or you might get hit when I make a jesture. I guess I would have been great sitting before a fire telling the tales of yore.