[QUOTE=gum]
Do you [happy] guys actually feel happy now?
I’m asking because I can remember lots of happy times, but it didn’t feel like happiness at that particular moment.
When I was a kid I climbed to the top of the highest tree in the woods. I could see for miles and miles. It was quiet and serene.
I realise now that I was happy at that time. I didn’t at that moment. I just thought it cool.
[QUOTE]
I know what you mean, but yes, I really do. I feel joyful and well-disposed to just about everyone, and amazingly grateful for this wonderful gift that is my life.
To the non-happy people - I have never felt this way before, and never thought I would. So it can happen to us all. Really.
My husband’s job has relaxed enough to allow him to come home in time for dinner most of the time, and he’s even taken a few days off. My kids are healthy and developing well and not being worrisome in any way. Everyone is happy and loves each other. I get to do a lot of things I want to do, and I just started working as a substitute librarian sometimes, which is fun. I’ve finished my Christmas shopping and don’t have to enter the mall unless I want to, and I only have to play the carols I want to hear.
And I’m pretty much terminally cheerful in temperament anyway, which helps a lot during difficult times. It takes a lot to make me really depressed, and I’m very grateful for that.
I’m actually pretty amazed at how well things are going, and am almost ready to start peering suspiciously around the corner to wonder what awful thing is going to happen–but last time I did that, an awful thing really did happen, so I don’t want to.
I’m happy when i’m not depressed :). I once read that the part of the brain that deals with good moods, bad moods, and the part of the brain that deals with whether life is meaningful are all independent. So its possible to have a meaningful life that is unhappy, or you can be both happy and unhappy, etc. The 3 are not exclusive things.
I have a few reasons to be unhappy right now.
I worry about flunking out of college (i worry alot anyway, I don’t know how true these worries are). I worry about finding a job and liking said job when I graduate. I have traumatic past events and depression runs in my family.
But I have many reasons to be happy as well. I have a good family, I get grants for school, I am improving myself on all fronts all the time, I am learning what I need to know to get through life, my brother will have his first child soon and my parents will be first time grandparents (i’m hoping this will make my dad become less work obsessed and give my mom more purpose in her life), I live in the 21st century which is flooded with human rights, dignity and medicine. If I muck college up I can just try something else.
Plus I have read alot on the psychology and neuroscience of happiness, and that has boosted my mood.
So overall, yea I am happy. I’m just stressed out, afraid and feel that life is somewhat pointless at the same time.
Things are far from perfect right now, but I’ve got a wife who I get to hug lots, and we genuinely connect on a regular basis. I’ve got a very cool 21 month old who surprises me every day with help generosity and curiosity. oh, and out money woes are over for the foreseeable future (at least, will be when they sign the damned contract).
My wife of seventeen years wants a divorce. We have two kids, who are not happy about it either.
This is causing my depression to go into overdrive, affecting my health so much that I was given an involuntary leave of absense from work in the hope that I could get some effective help.
I do, however, have supportive family and freinds. I know they love me, and they know the feeling’s mutual.
Right now the Dope helps a lot by being its usual informative, entertaining, hilarious, infuriating, compassionate self. The Dope is such a loveable mass of contradictions!
Well, I’m definitely not as down in the dumps as I’ve been in past months, but I’m no where near happy either. A state of limbo I suppose.
I still feel like I’m just living my usual routine. I don’t stop because I’m afraid to stop. Afraid of losing my job, afraid of flunking out of college. Other than that, I guess I don’t have any real reason to get out of bed in the morning. I wish I did.
Yes! I’m genuinely happy now. The last year has been extremely stressful, but I made it through that okay and things have actually started to pay off. Interesting stuff going on in both my personal life and my work life, and for once I’m not stressing out about it, but just saying, “Neat!” and seeing what happens next. There’s a real feeling of potential.
The interesting part (to me, anyway) is how much of “happy” I associate just with being content. It feels like most of the times I’ve thought of myself as “happy” in the past have been more like “manic.” As in, things feel grrrrrreeat but there are dark clouds on the horizon, and anything to chip away at it will bring the whole thing crashing down.
Now, though, I feel like I’m seeing everything for what it is. There’s plenty of stuff about myself I still need to fix, but I’m not obsessing on it. (And best of all, I’m no longer lying to myself about most of it). I’m not worrying about what could go wrong, but just enjoying things now and will react to the problems when they do go wrong. I’m not concentrating on the things that aren’t perfect, because perfect isn’t real. So yeah, I’m content, which means that I can say I’m happy and mean it.
I’ve always been fairly happy, even when I realized in retrospect how much parts of my life sucked. And things are going quite well right now – I have a wonderful wife who I completely adore, a big slobbery dog after years of wanting one, and a challenging, interesting job I really like. And some disposable income, which is a nice change after years of being a cash-strapped student. (Of course, I do still have student loans to remind me of those years… Oh well.)
Of course there are lots of mostly little things that could be better, but I’d say I’m quite happy overall.
It’s been a really disappointing and frustrating year so far. This week, in particular, has dragged me down further than I would have thought. Essentially, I’ve finally hit the last straw at my current job (a member of senior management decided that he doesn’t like me and makes it very obvious - he’s a vindictive asshole). It’s felt like everything was moving in this direction for a while, but it finally all collapsed on me in the last few days and I realized that I’m done with it. The real job search begins now.
Technically, it’s a good thing. I’ve needed to leave for a while and this week is the kick in the ass that I really need to get moving. It just doesn’t feel very positive right now.
Well, I doubt the same qualifiers would work for everyone. I am frustrated with my job right now, and I am stressing over my grad classes. Money is always tight, even with both of us working. I spent almost a week in the hospital in October, and now our middle child is slated to have his tonsils out on December 17. Medical bills loom on the horizon. Am I happy?
Yes, I am. I seems kind of lame when I explain to anyone how or why, but I am. I wake up every morning next to the man of my dreams, and lie down every night next to him. My husband, my children, and I are, aside from the evil tonsils of pain, healthy. We pretty much have everything we need, and occasionally, through careful budgeting, get to splurge on something we just want. We all share hobbies and interests as a family, as well as having things we shine at individually. We always have fun. Bottom line, though, is that I can’t think of anything my life is missing.
When I think about how much professional help that I should have gotten at this same time, last year, it seems amazing that I could make such a turnaround. I’m in my second year of college, worrying about what to do with my life, but I feel so fortunate to have this problem. I have so many options and opportunities, it can feel overwhelming, but I know that I could be happy doing many of them.
Last year at this time, I have never felt so low. I felt confused, lost, stupid, and incompetent. Looking back, I know that I should have seen someone but I didn’t feel like there were enough hours in the day.
Now, I’m about to celebrate 4 years with the man I’m going to marry. I feel as relaxed and as comfortable in my own skin as I ever have. I have a solid group of friends ans family who would do anything for me. Yes, I can finally say that I am happy. I think that this is the first time I can say it since around 2000.
Some may know on this board I’m an intern right now. I’ve been trying to figure out what my life/career goal should be for the past five years. Going through this intenship right now has proven to me I’m not cut out for education. It has though opened my eyes to how talented a musician I am (I say that modestly, but I’m one of the stronger musicians in my university program). So in two weeks when my intenship is done I’m pursuing my dream of music. Come hell or highwater, I will at least know I am pursuing what I WANT to pursue. Makes all the difference to me.
Sorry to hear it, man. You both seemed content when I met you in July. I’d offer help but I’m not in any sort of position to give any at the moment but if you ever need to talk or anything, my email is in my profile.
Work’s a pain in the butt, but aside from that, my life is ranging from pretty darn good to un-fricken-believable. Compared to where I was five years ago, things are good.
I think I’m happier than circumstances warrant. This year it just has seemed like every time I turned around something even worse than the previous worse thing happened.
Today I spent hours playing phone tag with my paed and my son’s gastro. On the plus side, the paed tracked the gastro down because he wanted K admitted today. the gastro’s given me until 7.30am Monday to get him unconstipated. If he is admitted then we might be able to do the MRI which is scheduled for Dec 22 while he is in hospital and it won’t cost me serious money as he’s going into the public hospital. On a yet more positive note, the truly horrendous constipation he’s enduring probably means he doesn’t have a tethered spine which probably means we’re not doing neurosurgery in the New Year and it makes it seem unlikely he has tumours on his spine or brain too.
But I’m OK. My family is wonderful support, my kids’s teachers are great support and we’ll get through this like we got through the rest of this nightmarish year.
No, but I haven’t been for a long time. I have to have a long, uncomfortable, talk with my mom and dad this christmas in hopes of borrowing money for a therapist. I sorta quit going a year and a half ago when I switched schools and the school I moved to didn’t have the facilities. I can’t afford to pay for my own.
I can honestly say I’m the happiest I’ve ever been at the moment. Emofkuniv and I got married in August and although we don’t yet have our own place and we’re living with my family, we have our own space in the house and we make the best of whatever we have. It doesn’t really matter about any of that anyway, because inside I’m so happy I’m with the person I adore more than anyone else in the universe - being that lucky to find your soulmate really is incredible. We have plans for the future, for our house, our own family … all of that is so great to share with someone you love.
Ok, I’ll stop gushing now and pass the sick bucket
