I am. Right now, at this time and place in my life, I have never been happier.
The thing is, a year ago, not only was I not happy, but *I honestly couldn’t remember a time in my life when I was. * I wasn’t unhappy, don’t get me wrong, I was reasonably content, and extremely bloody grateful that the misery I’d felt for most of the previous ten years had come to an end, but I wasn’t happy. There was no real reason for me not to be, I just didn’t feel it.
So who else shares my deeply fortunate, wouldn’t-change-a-thing, just-damned-glad-to-be-alive position?
I’m disabled at the moment due to being hit by a car while walking to work a month ago and was in the hospital for five days, one of which was spent in ICU for a suspected embolism. Since getting out, I’ve spent every day but four or five in my apartment, alone, cold, and slightly depressed since it’s the holiday season and I live 2,500 miles from my closest family member and know a grand total of two people, my boss and her husband, in this town.
Obviously, I’ve been out of work this entire time too and am currently two months behind on my rent and it will be three in a couple more weeks. While I have a very understanding landlord, he’s already called to ask how much longer it’s going to be before I can start paying again and I can’t say I blame him… he’s already been cooler about this than 98% of other landlords would be. I’ve filled out forms for getting lost wages and have sent them to my lawyer but I have no idea how long that will take to process.
If it weren’t for the kindness of a dozen or so different Dopers, my boss and her husband, and a few other people in town that have taken pity on me and done a lot of things for me, I’d be in much worse shape though. As bad as all this sounds, it’s still better than living in a care facility would be, which is where I would have wound up if I hadn’t gotten all the help I have.
And because of all that, while not happy, I can’t say I’m too unhappy either. This is probably one of the bleakest moments in my life but it could be so much worse.
Pretty much, yeah. The things in my life that do make me unhappy are all situational (need more money, wanna lose weight, etc.) and I know will change eventually.
Aeserion, I hope you get well soon! I’m glad you have such an understanding landlord.
I’m pretty happy myself. Going into the ninth month of marriage with a wonderful man, able to work at home and am slowly getting clients, which equals money, which means that I might not be forced to go back to the corporate grind, which had worried me considerably earlier. Also, we’re thinking about a new home and babies. These are very considerable changes from last year, particularly the work situation - I was absolutely miserable and it was beginning to affect my health and my relationship with my husband. My goal now is to get my business generating enough money before we move (probably not for quite a while) so that my husband can go to grad school without having to take out a loan. I doubt that’ll happen, but hopefully I’ll be able to cover living expenses and he’ll be able to go full-time.
No, not really. I occasionally feel sort of blissful, but it’s short-lived and I view it, even at the time, as some kind of temporary artifice, much like the black-dog depression that hits me for an hour or two every so often. Both states are fleeting.
I really should feel happy, though. I’ve got everything I could want or need, mainly through luck; but I’m terminally dissatisfied. I can be in a good mood, too, but this is always on top of a bedrock of mild melancholy. I don’t let it get me down, though, if you know what I mean - I carry on as if I were a happy person.
Just recently, there’s been a lot of money stress, and some of you may be all too familiar with my problems with my oldest daughter. Still, yes, I’m happy. I always tell my husband “I know money can’t buy happiness, but we’re already happy; I can’t imagine that a little money would hurt things any!”
I have the best husband in the world, adequate medical care for my health problems, my children are physically healthy, and two of them are emotionally healthy as well. We have a house to live in, clothes to wear and food to eat. We love each other. And I have all the wonderful folks on the SDMB in addition to several really good IRL friends. What’s not to be happy about?
This is the best year of my life. I’ve nearly always felt happy, but now I’m just great.
I (also) am in love; I have a boyfriend who’s a better man than I could hope for; I’m feeling good about myself; I have disposable income; and I have 1-3 months of vacation in Australia coming up at Xmas. I automatically like most people and I always assume most people like me.
I realise most of my happiness it is due to blind luck and a bunch of chemicals firing in my brain. I didn’t do anything special to deserve this and I’m desperately thankful for my good fortune.
That’s exactly how I feel. I never expected to be this happy, I don’t think I deserve to, but I’m so grateful for it.
And yes, part of my current happiness is due the fact that I’m in love with the most incredibly kind, loving, entertaining man I’ve ever known, (he’ll kill me when he reads that, it’ll embarass him) and, miracle of miracles, he loves me too. But it’s also because I finally have a job in which I feel I’m doing something useful, and I feel valued by my employers; and because I finally have a home. I’ve moved around so much in the past eight years, never staying anywhere very long, and everywhere I’ve lived has either been due to the kindness of others, or a on such a short term lease that I barely bothered unpacking. It makes such a difference to be able to think: Here is my bit of earth.
Yes, I’d like to be 2 stone lighter, and considerably richer, and a sucessful acting career wouldn’t go amiss but, in reality, I wouldn’t swop what I have now for all the beauty, money and fame in the world.
I’m pathologically bad w/ women and I have no hope in that regard. Because of my level of income, I can’t even afford the only means by which I might even see a woman naked (well, topless if the strip club serves alcohol). I recently saw my ADD doc and in spite of being meds I still test nearly off the charts. I don’t like my job and there is pretty much no job for which I’d be suited. I’m way behind at work and can’t even begin to get organized. I’m worried that my car is going to plotz even though I have no real evidence to justify that worry. I can’t get back into bjj because I’m feeling so lazy. When I failed my micro qualifying exam I decided that the best I could hope for was to get a tolerable job and become a pothead. I don’t even have the wherewithal to become a pothead. I aspire to become a pothead. The only thing more embarrassing is getting fired from a position as crack-whore. The organizing tool that is so good that even the most intransigently-disorganized brain damage sufferers can succeed with it is a tool that I have pretty much failed at. I’m gaining weight faster than a newborn elephant. And I heard that Natalie Portman got her nude scenes removed from that movie she’s gonna be in.
On the plus side, I finally have a place to myself, I’m a NaNo winner, and XJETGIRLX may illustrate my novel. I got a used copy of the two-volume Compact OED, though I need to get an effective magnifier, and my jaw isn’t as fucked-up as it used to be. So…I’m better than I was; but if asked to do it all over agian, I’d still opt out altogether.
Nope. Not even close. Yeah, I can still smile at something nice happening, but then I’ll just crawl back into my cave, thanks very much. I’ve never been a very happy person, but I can sure fake happy if I need to. I think that’s part of the problem, actually.
But I’m glad some people are happy. Otherwise I’d have nobody to be envious of and bitter towards.
Do you [happy] guys actually feel happy now?
I’m asking because I can remember lots of happy times, but it didn’t feel like happiness at that particular moment.
When I was a kid I climbed to the top of the highest tree in the woods. I could see for miles and miles. It was quiet and serene.
I realise now that I was happy at that time. I didn’t at that moment. I just thought it cool.
To the unhappy ones: hugs.
I’m not very happy myself, so I’ll hug myself as well while I’m at it.
I finally have a nice place to live (rather than the apartment I was in with the neighbors constantly screaming and cursing at their kids). I have 4 cats and 1 dog and they are all happy, healthy, wonderful animals. I finally got up enough balls to quit my job and start my career in Real Estate…I love it…and I have 2 deals that will be closing within a few weeks of each other (right after Christmas) so we will have more money coming in. And most of all, I have the best, most wonderful, intelligent, loving husband anyone could ask for. I wouldn’t trade him in for anything…and I mean, anything.
I think the only “want” I have right now is a baby. We’ve been working on it for over 2 years now and I am really, really starting to worry that it will never happen. But, that is the only thing in my life that I am unhappy about…I guess I can’t complain!
