I’m definitely not, although I’ve been happily married for 16 years now. We had to creep up on our wedding, approach it like a game of chicken, each of us expecting the other to veer away at the last second. I still think if my engagement had lasted more than six hours I would never have done it. Would never in a million years do it again, at least not with anyone else. If I found out I wasn’t really married, I could probably be persuaded to marry my husband again, but if he wasn’t available, i’d probably never even seriously date again. To much breaking in time.
:: reads over thread ::
Man, is this a case of “the grass is greener on the other side of the fence” or what? Singles waning to be married, marrieds (some of them) wanting to be single. Off hand, I’d say that the marrieds have the better deal, but then I’m a single, so I’d be expected to say that.
Marriage seems to me to be the better state, but that’s qualified by the fact that when a marriage goes wrong, it’s way worse than singlehood going wrong.
I’m very much the marring kind.
Liz Taylor said it best: “If I didn’t believe in marriage, I wouldn’t have married so often”
I wasn’t the marrying kind, still don’t really consider myself the marrying kind, but I fell in love with a man who was most decidedly the marrying kind.
That sums up my opinion much better than I’ve been able to!
Oh, I definitely understand that–and good luck, I hope you find what you’re looking for. I agree, marriage is definitely not a state that works for all couples. I don’t think the problem is marriage itself, it’s the people who don’t really want to actually compromise, or end the relationship when it needs it. Too may people seem to think a 15 minute ceremony will magically make their SO stop being an annoying twit.
So maybe I’m switching my answer, after all. 
I’m the marrying type in the right relationship, but by no means all. I guess call myself the “cautious” type.
Not sure if I’m the marrying kind or not. Only did it once 43 years ago…our anniversary was yesterday; we celebrated with a nice dinner.
I had the leftovers tonight for dinner to remind me that I’m still married after all these years…
While on the SDMB I wouldn’t describe the entire sordid tale of my relational past, I will direct you to a website where the DVD can be purchased. 
Were I to decide on a common sin of my past, it would be moving too quickly. Things are comfy and mutually enjoyable, so I will let things be and take things as they present themselves. I’m privileged to have a lovely lady in my life, so why should I do something to eff it up? 
Amen. Far too many people get married because it’s just what you do. They seem to think that it makes you a grownup, and bestows some sort of Seal of Approval on you. So they find someone willing to marry them, and they get married. But the thing is, not just anyone will do. And marriage doesn’t make your relationship problems go away, it amplifies them.
Whenever I’ve thought about marriage, I’ve asked myself “Can I picture myself at 70, sitting here with this person, having the exact same conversation for the 8337th time?” And the answer has always been “Fuck no, I’ll be in prison at 70, having taken a bat to his head the 5214th time.”
So until I find someone who can make me answer that question with a yes, I’ll skip it, thanks.
Having been married now for several years, I think I can safely say, “No”.
I am not the marrying kind. However, I am married, and for a long time.
The reason I think I’m not the marrying kind is that I was engaged four times. The typical thing was to go from madly in love to engaged to meh, almost instantly.
That’s right, as soon as I had a ring, I lost interest. In one case–when I thought it must surely be time to go through with it anyway, as a rite of passage–I fell madly in love with somebody else.
Eventually I did go through with it, and then I was depressed for the whole first year. I really have to brainwash myself, and I mean on a regular basis, into feeling I did the right thing. Fortunately I have perfected the art of self-brainwashing.
I may be the type that wants to marry, but that means nothing. The “marrying type” is the type that does marry right?
A safe classification of what type I am is “perpetually single”. It’s hilarious that I might share such a designation with people that are NOTHING like me. Like “playas”. They have no attachments, but can be a douche at every turn.
To me, someone who would describe themselves as “perpetually single” doesn’t want to stay single and would commit to the right person. A “playa” would never call him or herself perpetually single because being single is their thing. Your definition may vary.
Egads, a woman here at work is forwarding “funny” stories and “pass this on for good luck” junk e-mails like there is no tomorrow. Five in the last two minutes. Stop it, stop it, stop it!
However, I got this one while reading this thread:
>A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa .
>>> "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most
>>> of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks
>>> corrode your stomach lining.
>>> Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous,
>>> and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in
>>> our drinking water.
>>>
>>> But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all
>>> have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that
>>> causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"
>>>
>>> After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row
>>> raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake.
When my husband and I met, neither of us was “the marrying kind” - we had been married in the past (me twice) and were vehemently set against it another time.
Then 9-11 happened. That November we got married - we really deeply felt the need “belong” to each other for some reason. Not that we didn’t belong to each other before, it was more the solidness of actually getting married - if that makes any sense at all. We needed to be “joined” I guess.
Sorry. I know I’m not making sense - I’ll go back to my lunch and shut up now.
I’m not really the marrying kind, myself. I’ve been happily in an open marriage for two years though, and it’s still going on.
My previous dating history is sufficiently fraught with peril that I’m not sure what I really am, overall.
No. I don’t even want a serious romantic relationship. I don’t want to always have to worry about someone else’s needs and feelings when making important decisions about my life. I don’t want the constant daily demands on my time and attention. I don’t understand why it’s such an attractive proposition to virtually 100% of the rest of the world. And I’m a woman, which makes me all the weirder.
I should also add that I’m not on the autism spectrum. I have lots of friends, like spending time with people, etc. But I want to go home alone at the end of the day.
I would be curious to know what age people are. Most guys I know are not the marrying kind until they hit their 30s. Then they seem to come to some kind of realization that they aren’t going to be able to pick up 20-something year old girls in bars indefinitely.
I’m the “marrying kind” and conveniently enough: I’m married. I was never one for casual dating, it just wasn’t my style. If I didn’t see myself getting married somewhere down the line, I broke it off.
Yeah, pretty much what he says, but with the genders reversed.
sigh
On the one hand, it’s nice not to have to consult someone else anytime I make a decision (you want to paint the walls what?!). On the other hand, I’d like to have someone to care for who cares for me, who can share in decisions, complement my strengths and weaknesses, and share excellent cuddles.
At 43, the odds of that seem mighty slim, and I’ve moved on to creating a life for myself where I may be alone but have friends I love and can spend time with. Not my dream of long ago*, but not the worst thing that could ever happen, either.
*Husband, two kids, house with a yard, a picket fence and rose bushes, and a cat or two in the front window. What can I say, I was a real traditionalist. Probably still am, somewhere deep inside.
I don’t think I’m “the marrying kind.” But I’ve been married for 13 years now, and ecstatically happy. But if I had to do it again, I’d insist on separate houses.