The shoot area is cordoned off with a surprise audience including friends and family members, but there’s a crane/man bucket (how do you hide that?) for an overhead shot.
There is no way they would go through the time and expense of setting up the location if they weren’t 100% sure the participant had agreed to appear on the show. Yes, it’s possible they had an unknowing backup substitute. But how likely is it that someone else who you’ve discussed appearing on the show would visit that location and think “Oh look, they happen to be shooting on the day we happen to be here!”.
Ugh, I got no notifications about this thread between my last post and just now. I guess any further complaint about this would be better suited for ATMB, but just FYI, that is why I may have seemed to abandon the thread.
And to reiterate: I am 100% clear on the fact that there is no real spontaneity or surprise on this show. My whole issue is that to get to the point where all this stuff is staged, someone has to tell the person who is the focus of the episode that they want them to appear on the show. And at whatever moment that person learns what the show is about (or at that exact moment if they already know), I consider that extremely insulting and humiliating. I don’t mean “appearing on national TV” humiliating, but humiliating within my social circle, which I would consider much more important.
Compounded by the fact that I would definitely refuse to go on, and then the awkwardness of my refusal would hang in the air, as well as my knowledge that they think I’m not only a fashion and style disaster, but that I was foolish to refuse, and I am therefore stubbornly continuing to be a disaster (albeit a less oblivious one—but ignorance is bliss) after stupidly passing up a bunch of free stuff. Lose-lose, all downside.
I am not by nature a pessimistic or paranoid person, but if this happened I would regularly wonder if my friends were sort of shaking their heads and clucking behind my back about how sad it is that I was too prideful to let them and the Fab Five help me become less of a pathetic spectacle.
I just can’t see any way forward from that, other than a new set of friends in a new city. As I say, I would most likely do some diligent research to privately give myself a makeover in that transition, but I’d also make sure those former friends were deleted from my social media so they would not see that this is what had happened.
Indeed. In sociology there is a notion of frontstage behavior and backstage behavior. It’s probably a continuum, because I am a little more backstage with close friends than with acquaintances or the public. But really, I think for myself anyway I am only really backstage with my wife and kids. Not even my good friends. So my wife might tell me that I am inadvertently mixing navy with black, or that my favorite Neutral Milk Hotel T-shirt is getting too ratty to wear in public, but she is really the only human being on the planet I feel comfortable getting this kind of feedback from.
And even from her, I would be insulted by being told I was in need of a complete makeover. But I also think she would be insulted if someone else said so, because that would implicitly be an insult to her as well—both because it runs down the attractiveness of her chosen mate, but also because she is assumed to have a responsibility in making sure I am presentable. Some may say that this is sexist, and maybe so—but although she is commonly seen in a Notorious RBG T-shirt and has a whole shelf of feminist theory books, she does embrace this role and it is a matter of her own pride on the line.
I’ve never been in front of the camera, but have been to a few TV show tapings in the audience. Even being in the audience, when the camera or cameraman points towards you, you’re immediately aware if it/their presence.
The point being, that to appear on TV, despite how shy, reserved and embarrassed the participants may seem, it takes a certain type of personality to be in front of the cameras. As discussed, at some level they’re acting and reacting according to what they’re directed to do. Even when you’re in the audience, you don’t just go “yay…”, you’re directed to go YAYYYYY!!!".
While you (and I) would never agree to appear (I don’t even like people taking my picture and don’t any after 3rd grade), the participants who relish either the exposure or the monetary gains they receive, at least at the time the shoot is happening.
You’re obviously very sensitive to the issue of your fashion sense being questioned, but as I stated above, the actual initial exchange between the person making the recommendation and the potential participant is probably much, much tamer than what is shown/staged. And as you agree, a good portion of reality shows ARE staged.
Edit: Just keep reminding yourself…despite its genre name…it’s NOT real!
Edit 2: I fail to see how your social circle would even know the subject was brought up if say your wife was the one to bring up the topic with you. Sure, your/her/mutual friends may have prompted bringing it up, but she doesn’t have to let them know how you reacted/responded.
FYI, I’m not the neatest guy, hate to shave and comb my hair and I’ve never liked anything but basic earth colors in my shirts. And my current shirts of choice are black polo shirts with black pants 5 days a week for work and black t-shirts and jeans for the weekends. I’ve had friends and family tell me outright that I should expand my fashion options. My answer? I don’t care, I like what I like! You can be all bright and colorful, but it’s not for me.
I know it’s tougher when you’re married or a relationship, but when my friends call me on my fashion sense or my nature (I’m brutally honest), I tell them, “If it bothers you so much, why do you want to remain my friend?”
I am not shy at all, just the opposite. I would be happy to be on TV if the reasons were because I was seen as interesting and cool, rather than unhip to such a cringe-inducing degree that middle aged teachers at a high school in a small Midwestern city felt I needed a style intervention.
What was shown/staged was actually very mild. But in a patronizing way. It’s more the snarky comments made when she was offscreen that bothered me. I think she was intelligent enough to see through the condescension. But if not, she may have been hurt only once she saw the actual episode and heard what people said behind her back.
If my wife brought it up and did not say anyone else talked to her about it, then I would just shut it down quickly and no big deal. But I did not get the impression that this woman’s husband was the only one to bring it up to her. I guess that is really just speculation, but he was certainly not active on the show.
BTW, one reason I see it as potentially more hurtful in this case is that she wasn’t just some busy professional who were very basic clothes and had her hair in a ponytail or something. She showed them how she had certain outfits for work and other more dressy ones for concerts and so on, and while they may not be fashion forward (as Tim Gunn would say), they had a lot of bright prints with colorful patterns, and were not just basic nakedness coverings. And she took time to curl her hair. She actually put thought and work into how she looked, which I think is quite different from the people posting here who say they don’t really care or put effort into that stuff. She is not being told just to pay more attention to that, but to stop having such atrocious taste and style. That’s harsh!
I’ll pass on this link to support my (and other’s) belief that a great portion of this and other reality shows are staged/exaggerated for dramatic effect (particularly the negative comments you’re referring to) and leave the last comments to you.
"It’s not a big secret that modern reality shows are somewhat scripted and that scenes are guided by directors and producers, who tell the people appearing in the show what type of drama they want and suggest a few things that will help instigate “the good stuff.” What Not to Wear instructed participants, in the early days of one’s filming, to do certain things out of the blue.
“Mostly, this involved the participant to say lines or phrases even if they wouldn’t have said something like it in real life. This was supposed to be for “secret” footage they obtained for two weeks while the contestant would go about their normal day, but most knew the reason they were told what to do. So, when the footage was shown for the episode, it was no surprise to anyone.”
"Like most reality shows, What Not to Wear had long filming days. Most episodes took 2 days of filming and a few more days of editing and reshooting, so total time on the episodes you see aired ran about one week. Many participants found the experience consumed a lot of their energy and time.
**The film crew had to remain extremely detailed-oriented, and if you weren’t privy to their tasks, nothing made sense about what they were doing. Another time-consuming factor was reshooting. Participants and hosts were often asked to say or do something multiple times so the camera and sound crew could get the perfect shot. This especially made for long days as the show recorded hours and hours of footage to chop down in the 45-minute episode viewers see.*"
We are arguing past each other. I don’t see how staging it makes a difference. You don’t think the targets actually have great style but pretend to have ugly hair/clothing for a few days, then get a fake makeover? Because the snarky comments made are only inaccurate insofar as going too broad with the definition of “mullet”. It’s an unfortunate hairstyle either way. But to call that out on national TV, I don’t see much relevance in its being prompted/scripted rather than spontaneous.
