In honor of all the recent “Ask the” threads, I thought I’d also start one to which I was unfortunately suited.
A little background first. Depression ‘runs’ in my family. I’ve had bouts off and on since at least my teenage years. In 2003 I had way too many life changing events and was unable to function. Finally, I found my way to anti-depressants and began to slowly climb upward again. Currently, I’m in a bit of a rocky patch again where my meds aren’t quite right. But we’re working on it. And today I don’t feel too bad. I guess that’s all that I can ask for. One day at a time.
So, ask away! Just remember IANAD. But I have tried alot of different meds, etc. Other depressed dopers feel free to join in!
Good questions. Well, the defining characteristics can be sometimes contradictory. For instance, either you want to (and do) sleep all the time or you can’t get to sleep because your mind is racing. I’ve had both happen at different times. Sadness and crying, of course are characteristic. Unfortunately for me loss of appetite is a characteristic that rarely effects me. A big one for me right now is the inability to focus my thoughts and concentrate on certain tasks. Listlessness, lack of energy, disinterest in old activities that used to be fun.
As to your second question, I would have to answer a little of both. When I was growing up I always felt that there was something just not quite right with me. More than just the usual teenage angst. It was kind of an underlying current back then. Today I can say that most of my worst depressive periods have been triggered by things.
My question, which I ask my perpetually depressed inlaws: If shrinks haven’t cured you so far, why do you still spend most of your disposable money on them.
Early adopter,VictrolaDivision, thanks for the chuckle!
Well, that’s just it. I don’t think there is a cure for depression. For some lucky people they may experience one episode in their whole life and it goes away. For others it’s an ongoing battle, one in which your ‘cure’ has just decided to quit working and you have to look for another. As to spending money on shrinks… Well, just today I got into a study on a new anti-depressant mainly because I can not afford to pay for my meds anymore, yet I cannot live without them.
Is that a sufficient answer? Hope springs eternal??
Edited to add this example for you. Clearly the medicine that I am currently taking is not working for me. I was alone here at work the other day and I picked up a chef’s knife to cut a cake. As I had the knife in my hand I started contemplating trying to slit my throat with it. Why continue paying shrinks? Well, I guess the other option leaves me lying in a pool of blood on the kitchen floor.
Hmm… Not quite sure I understand your question exactly. By philosophically do you mean that I ponder things like the world would be better off if I didn’t exist and so therefore I should do it? Or things like I can’t do it because of thinking what kind of impact it will have on my loved ones?
Most of my contemplations are like the aforementioned and are concrete. They’re mostly almost like dark fantasies. Logic doesn’t really enter in at that point in time.
Slightly off topic, but this brings to mind a thread from awhile ago where people talked about their irrational fears/compulsions. Mine, for instance, is related to this. Fear of standing too close to the edge of a high place because I might be compelled to jump off.
I’m sorry for dominating this, but I’ve been suddenly interested in the mechanics of depression, because I just found out that my grandma was struggled with it her whole life.
When you’re depressed (in the specific, not the general), can you still laugh and enjoy things once in a while, or are you entirely downtrodden?
I’m glad to answer, Speaker, depression has always interested me, too. There are different levels/intensities of depression. As a matter of fact, the study that I just got into grades your answers to a bunch of different questions to determine ‘how depressed you are.’
So, to answer your question, I think it depends on what level you’re at. At my current level I can still laugh and enjoy some things. Several years ago my mom was severely depressed and basically sat around and stared off into space all day. She definitely didn’t laugh or enjoy anything. Thank God she hasn’t been that bad since and neither have I.
In my case and my then girlfriend’s case, depression was based on something actual. There were issues and events that were “valid” things to be sad about, but our reactions to them were overblown beyond what would be considered normal. In the ex’s case, specifically, tiny little things that went wrong would set off her thinking about these issues and trigger depression.
Does this apply to you, or is depression more of a nebulous featureless thing where you don’t really know what the hell you’re depressed about in the first place?
Well, once again, I’ve had it happen both ways. There have been times where I cried for days for no reason at all. But my current parental drama is a big part of this depression, I’m sure. (Parents’ divorce, bankruptcy, possible foreclosure)
What techniques (if any) have you found helpful in teaching or reminding yourself that you are not your illness? What I mean is, how do you work on separating the symptoms of your illness from your personality traits if/when the depression is telling you that you’re not sick, you’re just A Bad Person?
Are you familiar with Anne Sheffield’s 's work and the concept of “depression fallout?” If so, what do you think of it, both as someone who lives with depression and one who’s experienced the illness of family members?
Sometimes there is no rationalizing with my irrational self. But overall, I have struggled with wondering why I need to take drugs for the rest of my life just to be a ‘normal’ person. Kind of wondering why I can’t just fix myself or ‘get over’ my problems. I’ve come to realize that depression really is like any other illness in some ways. For instance, if you broke your leg, you wouldn’t expect to fix it on your own. So why expect yourself to be able to tackle depression that way.
I had never heard of Anne Sheffield before seeing your link. But it makes lots of sense to me. There were many times that I felt like I was the parent and my mom was the child. As a matter of fact, at one point I actually moved out so as to distance myself from that which I felt was dragging me down.
Have you heard about the recent study proving exercise to be almost, if not as effective in treating depression as medication? (link) If so, do you have any particular opinion on it?
Along those lines, did you ever try non-pharmaceutical therapy (eg, talking with a therapist)? If so, how would you compare the two in terms of efficiency, cost/benefit, etc?
I also suffer from depression (as well as bipolar type II) Do you ever have serious trouble getting out of bed in the morning? I think that is one of my biggest symptoms - the urge to just stay in bed. 99% of the time, I get up because I know that if I don’t go to work I will eventually get fired, but some days the bed wins. My sister also suffers from severe depression and her first major breakdown involved not getting out of bed until she was finally physically removed by family and friends and taken to a doctor (her boyfriend finally called her mom because he didn’t know what to do - she just refused to get up for days turning into weeks.)
I would like to jump in quickly to give my experiences in regards to these suggestions (I suffer from clinical depression). Exercise is a great way to combat depression, BUT… when someone is in the grips of a depressive episode, and spiralling deeper down, it is absolutely impossible to find the energy to exercise. Thoughts of hopelessness and suicide predominate, all else fades away. I find that that talking with a therapist is also very effective, but again in the grips of a dark spell, all the cognitive therapy techniques just seem like a silly waste of time.
Have you ever read the book by Janet Gotkin, Too Much Anger, Too Many Tears? If so, does it resonate? If not: umm I don’t guess it’s worth spoilering or anything, but it’s a worthwhile read even if you need to use interlibrary loan to get a copy…
She knew she needed help and that something was wrong with her. Depression was horrible. After getting pushed aside several times she finally found a doctor who was inclined to admit her into a facility, and she was grateful that someone was taking her problem seriously. But the experience within the institution wasn’t what she bargained for. She got punished for not ceasing to express symptoms of what she felt inside. And people were cruel and nasty. To get out of that place she learned to fake it, to craft an external appearance that was very congenial, not depressed and also not argumentative or angry, and always very grateful. When she got released, she was still depressed. Their medications had not helped and via reward-and-punishment behavior modification (although they did not call it that) they taught her to keep it to herself.
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Anyhow… you ever been through the institutional-psychiatry mill? i.e., locked up for it against your will, or, once inside voluntarily, didn’t like it but could not leave?
Or have the professionals mostly been a positive in your life, supportive without being intrusive (let alone nightmare-stuff like the above)? I tend to hear that depressives nowadays have far better experiences with the psych professionals and psychiatric treatment than most of the rest of us (I was diagnosed schizophrenic). Has your experience with the psychiatric profession and ancillary professions mostly been a good one? Would you encourage a person who had reason to think she/he had symptioms of depression to seek out psychiatric help?
Do you feel a cameraderie with other mental patients who are not diagnosed with clinical depression but with something else instead? Like schizzies or bipolar folks? Or have you never been in close proximity (locked ward or otherwise) with such folks in order to know?
Do you have any feelings about the mental patients’ rights movement? How much have you heard about us? How about the mental health consumers groups? Have you heard about them?