Ask the guy who's been separated for a year

My wife and I have been separated for one year now. This state of affairs seems to shock those who know about it. I thought I’d see if anyone here had questions.

A few details:
We’ve been married for 13 years. We have 4 children from 3-12. They currently live with her, and I live in my parents’ basement. We separated due to personality and financial issues. We’d both like to get back together at some point, but neither of us is certain if or when.


Four children? Did you and your wife have problems for a long time? If so, why did you continue to have children? Do you feel that your separation is all the more difficult because there are so many children involved?

Yes, we did have problems for a long time, but we’re both the type of people who commit to a relationship. Culturally there’s the expectation to make it work. Also, there were many periods of optimism where we thought things would work out. Still, though, the last two children were not planned.

And absolutely it is more difficult with so many children involved. If there were no children, we’d almost certainly have divorced by now.

I hope that your situation resolves with the best possible outcome for everyone. It probably sucks to be living in your parents’ basement, but if you are doing it so that you can take care of the kids then you’re the man. Good luck to all of you.