Attention Hooters™

Your menu has a somewhat limited selection. That’s not necessarily a bad thing for the kind of establishment you’re tryng to be.

One of the items on your menu is a (cold) Chicken Pasta Salad. This item is a popular one with mrs. beagledave. According to our waitress today, Mariah, (mrs. beagledave to me: “She’s falling out of her shirt even more than the other waitresses”) it’s a popular choice for the waitresses there. I’m guessing it might be a popular item for many women. I’m not a big fan of the chicken pasta salad, and have never ordered it. Mrs beagledave has ordered it in the past.

Today was warm, mrs beagledave is 38 weeks pregnant…getting out of the house for a meal seemed like a good idea. That is until we went to order food. That’s when Mariah (damn, mrs beagledave is right…I’m gettin’ a free floor show here) solemnly informed us that Hooters has taken Chicken Pasta Salad off the menu. She muttered something about crab or something being a new addition.

I gasped. I looked to my left. I saw the sad look in mrs beagledave’s eyes. And I knew that life as I know it had been sadly changed. The one and ONLY frickin reason we go to Hooters together is because my wife enjoyed the cold chicken pasta salad…which I guess they used to do better than other joints in town.

I even knew the words that were going to come out of my wife’s mouth before she said them. “Well I guess we won’t be coming here for dinner any more”.


Well, color me stupid I thought that people went for the variety of food rather than the variety of breasts and butts in tight clothing!

< snicker >

I can tell you, I have been to Hooters once in my life…food was okay but the tight asses and pushed up breasts sure made me feel like a big ole blob. I think I will stick with the neighborhood bar and grill where the waitress laughs with a smoker’s laugh and can tell a dirty joke like few men can. Oh and the beer is cheaper too!

< snort >

Mmm… breasts and butts in tight clothing…

Aw, c’mon, Tech’ems, can’t we go to Hooters? Huh? Huh? Pwetty-pwease?

They have food there?


You can go to Hooters with your guy friends I will take a few of my chick friends and gather at the nieghborhood bar/grill and tell dirty jokes and giggle at the not-so-studdly men who think they look good in a ratty tshirt and holey jeans! :wink:

< offers SPOOFELY a shot of tequila >

I’m not feeling any love from you guys here.

Where is the passion? Where are the protesters willing to stand up and picket in front of Hooters™ to return the cold chicken salad? Marital unions everywhere…already under the stresses of longer commutes and job related anxieties…now face another hurdle.

I want guilt free boobage dammit! :frowning:

Anytime you might wish to stop down in Springfield with the missus, beags, I know for a fact that our Hooters still offers that pasta salad.

Hell, Techy, I’m gonna be where you’re gonna be… so I’ll gladly take that tequila!

Anyway… sorry, Beagle, but I’ve never been too keen about any type of salad, even if it does have chicken in it.

You have an Internet connection, don’tcha?

Damnit dave, stop letting that knocked-up wife of yours push you around!

So what if she’s carrying your child? So what if she’s endured mood swings, swollen ankles, the constant need to pee, lying on her left side all night, and a baby kicking her ribs, all to support the fruit of your loins as it grows within her. You’re a MAN damnit, and if you wanna go to Hooters, by golly, YOU WILL GO TO HOOTERS.

Maybe when she goes into labor and is all occupied at the hospital, you can swing by to shoot the breeze with Mariah?

Hmmmm :confused: “Mariah” (the waitress of vast, overflowing bosom) seemed to suggest that Hooters™, as a chain had discontinued the chicken pasta salad.

Thanks for the heads up Flyp… (btw, small world…mrs beagledave worked in Spiffled for 2 years…want to Illinois College in J’Ville)

If this is just a local thing…hmmm think I can get TVeblen and Kricket to join me in a sit down strike in front of the Hooters?

Umm…you’re not doing much to help the “guiltfree” aspect of “guiltfree boobage” here Cranky… :wink:

Dave, dave, dave. I’m sorry. I should have added that only by careful study of the anatomical details of the human female mammaries can you provide knowledgable and helpful support for any of your wife’s future attempts at breastfeeding. You’re not doing it for you, you’re doing it for her, and beagledave jr. It brings a tear to my eye, your desire to educate yourself as fully as possible all for the good of the family.

Frankly, I’m not sure if staring at Mariah’s bozangas (if you’ll permit me to stray from the sterile strictness of medical nomenclature) will be sufficient. I think you need to ogle all of the waitstaff at length. Perhaps consider spending study time at an establishment that will permit a view unobstructed by garments.

damn he posts a rant about hooters taking an item off of the menu that his wife likes – she actually could tolerate, maybe even enjoy, going to hooters with him, and your lying into him like a whooping dog there cranky. I’m not going to say that when going to hooters I don’t notice the waitstaff, but apparently Mrs. beagle doesn’t mind going there.

I don’t believe anywhere in the thread did beagledave state any disloyalty to his wife. Why the hell are you browbeating him? your telling me that once you get married you’ll never look at another person of the opposite sex again?

< techie slips kinoons a lude in a shot of tequila originally meant for SPOOFE >

< carefully prepares a virgin tequila shot for SPOOFE – no ludes or other drugs for him…just gonna pour another in a bit >

Having anticipated this irresponsible customer-service strategy long ago, I have been proactively boycotting Hooters for 7 years now. I go to Taco Bell instead – the women look better, anyway.

If the Mrs. can no longer go, I am more than willing to take her place and sit and oggle with you.

Sniff…Thanks Cranky & Kricket, I’m touched. Only on the SDMB can a guy from a small midwestern state find a new airtight rationale for frequenting Hooters…AND somebody to oggle with. :smiley:

The chicken pasta salad was indeed pretty good. Now I have a reason to go to Hooters in the near future, to see if its removal is a local or national phenomenon.

Of course, there’s not much that could make me NOT go to Hooters at SOMETIME in the near- to mid-future. There’s something about that place that I just can’t put my finger on, heh

I would add that in my experience, only the lucky men are with women who don’t mind (or even like!) going to Hooters, or give them shit for going to Hooters, or just for talking about wanting to go to Hooters. Count your blessings. I know women who would just as soon take a Ryder truck packed with explosives to every Hooters franchise in the world.

Whoosh, dude. I’m being funny.

And I’m a woman, and I’m married, I was recently pregnant, and I’ve been to Hooters.

What’s a whooping dog? Is that like a whooping crane?

Gah! That was the only edible thing there!!!

The last time I set foot in a Hooters establishment was with my competitive robotics team (all guys, spare moi who is the team welder/plasma cutter gal/ solder queen)

The guys walked in and drooled.

I can’t say I like the place. You don’t see women starting a restaurent called “Dicks and Dongs” now do you?

Elly :smiley: