Attn circumcised: your mother is likely a sex offender

[PunditLisa]

@MandaJo

You know, it’s posts like this (on both sides) that turn these threads into train wrecks.

You’re a crack up. But I’m glad you’ve come along to give this thread the solemnity it warrants.

[FoieGrasIsEvil]

@MandaJo

You know, it’s posts like this (on both sides) that turn these threads into train wrecks. Lots and lots of men are not circumcised and do not have “dick cheese” and look perfectly attractive. But some of them are inevitably going to have knee-jerk defensive reactions to the accusation that they have an ugly, nasty penis. I mean, you can’t hardly blame them. Except some of the defending will take the form of insulting the circumcised penis, which will make the other side defensive, and even more virulent in their own attacks and pretty soon we are all passionately arguing about something that just isn’t that big if a deal either way.

Look, the OP is insane. We can all agree with that. You don’t have to insult a bunch of random men to make it clear that the OP is crazy. It’s possible for BOTH the OP to be crazy AND it be a perfectly cromulent choice not to circumcise your child.

I don’t entirely disagree, but in other news…I’m just jerking around!

Perhaps that’s a poor word choice…

Anyway, I do honestly believe in the cockles of my heart that a circumcised penis is more attractive looking than an uncircumcised one. An uncircumcised penis really does look like a pig in a blanket.

[JKellyMap]

@FoieGrasIsEvil

I don’t entirely disagree, but in other news…I’m just jerking around!

Perhaps that’s a poor word choice…

Anyway, I do honestly believe in the cockles of my heart that a circumcised penis is more attractive looking than an uncircumcised one. An uncircumcised penis really does look like a pig in a blanket.

Heh heh, heh heh… You thaid “cockles” … Heh heh…

-- Beavis (or was it Butthead?)

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

Not even an exception for medically necessary infant circumcisions. He’s like the Fred Phelps of foreskin.

[Morgenstern]

@Try2B_Comprehensive

If your mother brought you to the medical authorities…
It really depends on the individual case. A circumcised infant might be raised by gay men, or circumcised by authorities who do not consult the parents, …

I’ve heard of those authorities. They are called the Foreskin Fraternity. They collect foreskins, sew a few together, and sell them as wallets. When need be, they can be rubbed briskly and become suitcases.

[August_West]

I know they say everything goes in cycles, but I never thought we’d see another Jack Dean Tyler!

Someone teach this guy about the Tug-Ahoy!

[Ambivalid]

@Princhester

Oh FFS Ambivalid T-R-O-L-L is not an alternative spelling of “person with whacko views”. The word gets thrown around like confetti around here. Try2B is persistently but consistently extremist and silly but as far as I can tell (worryingly) sincere. Lay off it already. Get another damn tune.

Uh, ok. Just asking. I’m still trying to nail down precisely what “trolling” is exactly and I’ve heard it described as “posted purposely just to inflame”; and this seems to fit that definition. Please forgive me for annoying you. :rolleyes:

[FoieGrasIsEvil]

@Morgenstern

I’ve heard of those authorities. They are called the Foreskin Fraternity. They collect foreskins, sew a few together, and sell them as wallets. When need be, they can be rubbed briskly and become suitcases.

I thought that’s what those Nazi lampshades were made out of?

[Lumpy]

To take the OP more seriously than it deserves, the vast majority of American men were circumcised because it was believed that circumcision led to lower rates of cervical cancer in their female partners. That may have been mistaken but the intention was blameless.

[John_Mace]

What’s all this fuss about circumspection?

[Meyer6]

@AK84

in all seriousness, child abuse is a real and depressingly common problem, someone of the responses to it are of such a nature that I worry that your example will soon really verboten.

Really? You think that we are moving towards a society in which it is frowned upon for a woman to change a baby boys diaper? How exactly do you think that would work?

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

@Lumpy

To take the OP more seriously than it deserves, the vast majority of American men were circumcised because it was believed that circumcision led to lower rates of cervical cancer in their female partners. That may have been mistaken but the intention was blameless.

It does reduce the rate of HIV transmission, so there’s that.

[Guinastasia]

I’m starting to wonder if the OP’s brains were in his foreskin. That would explain a lot.

[Victor_Charlie]

To paraphrase Liz Lemmon, the OP is staunchly in favor of Cocoa Puffs.

[drewtwo99]

The good news is that for messed up people like the OP, there is a way to re-form the foreskin by dangling weights of slowly increasing size off of what skin you have left. It will reform a foreskin of sorts, and looks a lot if not just like an uncircumcised penis.

So all you cut guys out there yearning for the days when you had foreskin, there is a way to go back to those halcyon glory days of yore. Just google how to reform your foreskin, or maybe google uncircumcise or something like that, I’m sure you’ll find it.

[Makeitstop]

@Ferret_Herder

If it is, he’s remarkably committed to that topic. I don’t want to wade through that thread again (the last time around was enough, thank you) but I’m pretty sure he was comparing circumcision to the removal of the clitoris and suggesting there was some kind of religious (Catholic?) brainwashing going on to keep guys from masturbating. Or something.

There was also somethign about the Queen of england in there.
…
…
Don’t ask. Read the thread if you’re THAT interested in finding out.

[Try2B_Comprehensive]

@Emiliana

Accepting the OP’s logic for one terrifying moment, why isn’t the father a sex offender too?

Geez, moving this to the pit really defeats the purpose.

The father is included too. The doctor has performed malpractice (at best) if there isn’t a solid reason for the procedure. I am not sure I can have this discussion in the pit though. I didn’t want to go on with this in the Germany thread because the focus there is completely backwards to me. Circ as a routine matter needs to go here in the US , without zeroing in on the religious motive. Personally I am not sure I am willing to ban it for Muslims and Jews. I kind of like those guys; it turns out I am not comfortable discussing the topic when the focus is a law restricting religions. IANAL for one; for two I don’t want to give the impression that my disgust with the slack-jawed stupidity of circ extends to those religions.

Sound like 'dopers are mostly big fans of infant partial-penile amputation though. But again, I don’t think this discussion can happen in the pit. Have fun. I may stop in to fight just to vent.

[Try2B_Comprehensive]

@PunditLisa

Personally, I’m glad that my husband’s mother sexually assaulted him when he was an infant. Through the years, I’ve become acquainted with both circumcised and uncircumcised penises, and I have to say that dick cheese is something I prefer to live without.

What a great reason to perform irreversible surgery on children- your convenience!

[Procrustus]

@Try2B_Comprehensive

Sound like 'dopers are mostly big fans of infant partial-penile amputation though. But again, I don’t think this discussion can happen in the pit. Have fun. I may stop in to fight just to vent.

Not that we’re necessarily fans, in fact I was not going to circumcise any sons born to me. [But, I had no sons] The disagreement you’re hearing is mostly about the level of outrage (“sex offender” and “partial-penile amputation” for example). It’s perfectly acceptable, even here at the SDMB, to be an any circumcision advocate. But over the top language provokes some push back.

[Candyman74]

@Try2B_Comprehensive

rape.

I do not think that word means what you think it means.