Bakers Dozen

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.
  9. Give her final approval over any and all interns.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.
  9. Give her final approval over any and all interns.
  10. Stop kissing NJ Governor Chris Christie’s huge tuckus. Even if he is the Republican Presidential candidate in 2016, it’s doubtful he’ll appoint Obama to anything.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.
  9. Give her final approval over any and all interns.
  10. Stop kissing NJ Governor Chris Christie’s huge tuckus. Even if he is the Republican Presidential candidate in 2016, it’s doubtful he’ll appoint Obama to anything.
  11. Stop telling the FBI to run background checks on all the boys in Malia’s classes.

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.
  9. Give her final approval over any and all interns.
  10. Stop kissing NJ Governor Chris Christie’s huge tuckus. Even if he is the Republican Presidential candidate in 2016, it’s doubtful he’ll appoint Obama to anything.
  11. Stop telling the FBI to run background checks on all the boys in Malia’s classes.
  12. Take a shower before coming to bed after those pickup basketball games with Shaq and Michael

Shouldn’t #4 refer to a Secret Service agent?

Other than quitting smoking, things Michelle Obama has gotten her old man to do

  1. Put down the silo lids after launching ICBMs
  2. Call her when he’s going to be out late with other heads of state.
  3. Stop referring to her live-in Mom as “First Bitch”
  4. Put the toilet seat down (although Obama insists that he has an FBI agent who is responsible for that.)
  5. Fill up Air Force One when the gas gauge reads quarter of a tank left
  6. Invite the Bidens over for dinner. They seem like nice people and it would be good to make some new friends.
  7. Stop wearing “dad jeans” in public.
  8. Got the Old Man to stop and ask directions when they are lost.
  9. Give her final approval over any and all interns.
  10. Stop kissing NJ Governor Chris Christie’s huge tuckus. Even if he is the Republican Presidential candidate in 2016, it’s doubtful he’ll appoint Obama to anything.
  11. Stop telling the FBI to run background checks on all the boys in Malia’s classes.
  12. Take a shower before coming to bed after those pickup basketball games with Shaq and Michael
  13. Break the stereotype and go down to tunatown! (dressed as Abe Lincoln and in the Oval office)

New List: If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.

    I have worked with people who haven’t actually been to work in years yet they are still on the payroll, seniority list, etc… so I just want to find out how they do it. I wouldn’t even keep the money, I’d return it or donate it to a school or charity.

New List: If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.

New List: If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.

New List: If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.
  8. Standard two weeks notice, and I’d make sure I handed over open work and files accordingly.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.
  8. Standard two weeks notice, and I’d make sure I handed over open work and files accordingly.
  9. I teach at a school so I’ll finish up my year and resign.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.
  8. Standard two weeks notice, and I’d make sure I handed over open work and files accordingly.
  9. I teach at a school so I’ll finish up my year and resign.
  10. I used to joke about going in for one last day, my F-You day. “How are you today?” “F-You!” “Would you like a coffee?” “F-You!” “Congratulations, we’ll miss you!” F-You!"

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.
  8. Standard two weeks notice, and I’d make sure I handed over open work and files accordingly.
  9. I teach at a school so I’ll finish up my year and resign.
  10. I used to joke about going in for one last day, my F-You day. “How are you today?” “F-You!” “Would you like a coffee?” “F-You!” “Congratulations, we’ll miss you!” F-You!"
  11. I’d tell them I’m telecommuting but then I’d just log on and nap and wait until they figured it out.

If you won the lottery, how would you leave your job?

  1. I would see how long I could not go in to work and still keep receiving my pay cheques.
  2. I like my co-workers and bosses, so I’d give 2 weeks notice and have a big farewell party on the last day.
  3. I’d call in and say goodbye over the phone. But then, I’m a Temp.
  4. I’d guess I’d have to come out of retirement and go back to work.
  5. (Assuming I’d want to close my business down) I would wind it down by completing all contracted assignments and pay my soon-to-be-fired employees a bonus of 2yrs worth of salary, plus my paying of any COBRA benefits for 24 months.
  6. I wouldn’t leave at all, but I’d travel more, give big bucks to charity, and maybe eventually run for office.
  7. I’m self-employed as a part-time author, which I wouldn’t change, but I would hire more help for the regular housework.
  8. Standard two weeks notice, and I’d make sure I handed over open work and files accordingly.
  9. I teach at a school so I’ll finish up my year and resign.
  10. I used to joke about going in for one last day, my F-You day. “How are you today?” “F-You!” “Would you like a coffee?” “F-You!” “Congratulations, we’ll miss you!” F-You!"
  11. I’d tell them I’m telecommuting but then I’d just log on and nap and wait until they figured it out.
  12. I’d go in and tell almost everyone “I won the lottery and you didn’t. Don’t ever contact me again.”