Bakers Dozen

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40604

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
40605

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
40606

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
40607

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
40608

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
  9. In a psychiatric ward, 2014.
40609

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
  9. In a psychiatric ward, 2014.
  10. The only one I spent alone, my wife had urgent family matters away, and I found out at home that the best TV show on Christmas Day is the Weather Channel.
40610

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
  9. In a psychiatric ward, 2014.
  10. The only one I spent alone, my wife had urgent family matters away, and I found out at home that the best TV show on Christmas Day is the Weather Channel.
  11. At my sister and her boyfriend’s apartment in Joliet while they were down in New Orleans where he proposed to her. Six months later they broke up.

Not a terrible place to be but I was in college and had little money and had no place to go.

40611

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
  9. In a psychiatric ward, 2014.
  10. The only one I spent alone, my wife had urgent family matters away, and I found out at home that the best TV show on Christmas Day is the Weather Channel.
  11. At my sister and her boyfriend’s apartment in Joliet while they were down in New Orleans where he proposed to her. Six months later they broke up.
  12. Penniless and as a poor relation guest of nouveau riche relatives in small town Alabama.

Though that was also the Christmas that my mother managed to send her brother into hiding for the holidays, so at least there was one good story that came out of it.

40612

Worst place you ever spent Christmas:

  1. On an Aeroflot flight, Khartoum to Nairobi
  2. Stuck in an isolated house with no company, no music and nothing to read
  3. In rehab after hip replacement surgery
  4. Alone in a new apartment after splitting with my wife in December 1992.
  5. Every place has been great because, hey, it’s Christmas! Even when shipping out for the Gulf War / Desert Storm in Dec 1990, Christmas is Christmas, a blessed day.
  6. Back at my parent’s place, single and alone, after I moved out and was established on my own. I felt like a loser. Looking back, it shouldn’t have been an issue, but I felt the glare of adults and wanted to crawl under a bed somewhere.
  7. At a homeless shelter. A bunch of us with nowhere to go, nobody to see, nothing special to eat and nothing to do all day.
  8. [If my mind counts as a “place”] 14 years old, 1976 (at our house). Had a nervous breakdown when I realized that the toys of childhood could no longer enthrall or interest me.
  9. In a psychiatric ward, 2014.
  10. The only one I spent alone, my wife had urgent family matters away, and I found out at home that the best TV show on Christmas Day is the Weather Channel.
  11. At my sister and her boyfriend’s apartment in Joliet while they were down in New Orleans where he proposed to her. Six months later they broke up.
  12. Penniless and as a poor relation guest of nouveau riche relatives in small town Alabama.
  13. Stuck with my in-laws and my nieces’ very nervous, constantly-whining, endlessly-pacing little dog

Next:

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
40613

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
40614

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
40615

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
40616

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
40617

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
40618

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
  7. Chewbacca gets a Brazilian wax.
40619

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
  7. Chewbacca gets a Brazilian wax.
  8. C-3PO and R2-D2 finally admit their love, and get married.
40620

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
  7. Chewbacca gets a Brazilian wax.
  8. C-3PO and R2-D2 finally admit their love, and get married.
  9. Luke Skywalker tearfully admits his greatest secret: he can’t read.
40621

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
  7. Chewbacca gets a Brazilian wax.
  8. C-3PO and R2-D2 finally admit their love, and get married.
  9. Luke Skywalker tearfully admits his greatest secret: he can’t read.
  10. Jabba the Hutt’s son Fred comes gunning for Leia (aka “that big haired bitch who killed my Pa”)
40622

Scenes cut from SW7 and unlikely to appear as DVD extras

  1. General Leia talks at length about her plastic surgery mishaps on Coruscant
  2. Lando Calrissian offers Rey a Colt 45
  3. Jar Jar Binks Jr. hits the cantinas, picks up a few hot babes.
  4. Darth Maul and Queen Padmé Amidala are sipping Mai Tais together in a bar, shooting the breeze. They kiss, lightly at first. Then it becomes passionate. They can barely control their desires.
  5. Han Solo gets word that a weird little beat up freighter, with Chinese characters painted on its side, beat his Kessel run by half
  6. The ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi appears to Lt. Worf.
  7. Chewbacca gets a Brazilian wax.
  8. C-3PO and R2-D2 finally admit their love, and get married.
  9. Luke Skywalker tearfully admits his greatest secret: he can’t read.
  10. Jabba the Hutt’s son Fred comes gunning for Leia (aka “that big haired bitch who killed my Pa”)
  11. BB8 opens, revealing he’s really a Furby-in-a-tin-suit.
40623

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