Bakers Dozen

[Iggy]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!

[gkster]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!

[astorian]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?

[SCAdian]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?
9. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED]
   Yeah, yeah, I know - he says that to everybody…

[gkster]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?
9. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED]
10. Shut it down!

[Elendil_s_Heir]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?
9. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED]
10. Shut it down!
11. As a sous chef, you make a helluva four-times-bankrupt businessman.

[astorian]

What Gordon Ramsay might say if he was teaching Donald Trump to cook

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?
9. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED]
10. Shut it down!
11. As a sous chef, you make a helluva four-times-bankrupt businessman.
12. Add a little Trump vodka to that sauce. Oh wait, I forgot, your vodka sucked and nobody sells it any more. I know, we can borrow some from Trump Airlines. Oh wait…

[notfrommensa]

1. I wouldn’t trust you running a bath, much less the whole country.
2. Are you even serious about cooking? Or is it like your run for the Presidency, doing it for shits and giggles?
3. Come on! If you can’t make a decent enough risotto to get customer to pay for it how are you ever going to get Mexico to pay for your wall!?
4. That wig is a health hazard.
5. Get your short fingers out of the bouillabaisse, you cretin!
6. The only thing Huuugeee in this kitchen is your incompetence!
7. That orange fake tan makes you look like a roast duck!
8. Without illegal aliens, where am I going to get dish washers and busboys, you bloody fool?
9. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED] [EXPLETIVE DELETED]
10. Shut it down!
11. As a sous chef, you make a helluva four-times-bankrupt businessman.
12. Add a little Trump vodka to that sauce. Oh wait, I forgot, your vodka sucked and nobody sells it any more. I know, we can borrow some from Trump Airlines. Oh wait…
13. No, it is not called “Chicken and Trumplings”

New Topic:

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins

[buddha_david]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith

[Little_Nemo]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed

[anyrose]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself

[notfrommensa]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.

[Sampiro]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. Bernie Sanders Chippendales past

[astorian]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.

[Intergalactic_Gladiator]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.
9. Hollywood Star’s Nightmare Decent into Booze and Sex

[JohnT]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.
9. Hollywood Star’s Nightmare Decent into Booze and Sex
10. 10 celebrity fat pics!

[Sampiro]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.
9. Hollywood Star’s Nightmare Decent into Booze and Sex
10. 10 celebrity fat pics!
11. What Bill and Hillary know but won’t tell about Natalie Wood’s drowning

[astorian]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.
9. Hollywood Star’s Nightmare Decent into Booze and Sex
10. 10 celebrity fat pics!
11. What Bill and Hillary know but won’t tell about Natalie Wood’s drowning
12. Obama’s Secret Lover: Chris Tucker

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

Headlines you would not be surprised to see in a Check-out Counter Tabloid.

1. Caitlyn Jenner: Pregnant with Twins
2. Osama bin Laden found alive and living in sin with Anna Nicole Smith
3. Miley Cyrus shocks concert-goers by performing fully clothed
4. New Evidence Points to O.J.'s innocence
5. Woman weds herself
6. Cessna lands on Peyton Manning’s forehead.
7. Bernie Sanders Chippendale past
8. Okay, we admit it- Elvis really is dead.
9. Hollywood Star’s Nightmare Decent into Booze and Sex
10. 10 celebrity fat pics!
11. What Bill and Hillary know but won’t tell about Natalie Wood’s drowning
12. Obama’s Secret Lover: Chris Tucker
13. UFO Lands on Mall in Washington - Sole Occupant: Andy Kaufman

New Topic

What will you do with your $4.50 tax refund?

1. Buy 2/3 of a Happy Meal.