Bakers Dozen

Thread Games
56427

Overheard around the Special Counsel’s office recently

  1. “Jeez, where do we even start?”
  2. “What did they know, when did they know it, and why would anyone think they didn’t?”
  3. “He tweeted WHAT?”
  4. “Let’s see that New York Times interview again.”
  5. “I can’t be sure, but I think I might actually have just seen Mr. Mueller smile.”
  6. “Does Trump have a hotel in a country where we don’t have an extradition treaty?”
  7. “How many esses in narcissist?”
  8. “Can we be sure the President didn’t actually shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue?”
  9. “Christ, guys, isn’t there ANYTHING impeachable here?”
  10. “If we’re still doing this a year from now, I think I’ll go join a monastery somewhere.”
  11. “I hear Putin’s just a shill for Kim Jong-un.”
  12. “I already told you- NO, being a dick is not an impeachable offense!”
56428

Overheard around the Special Counsel’s office recently

  1. “Jeez, where do we even start?”
  2. “What did they know, when did they know it, and why would anyone think they didn’t?”
  3. “He tweeted WHAT?”
  4. “Let’s see that New York Times interview again.”
  5. “I can’t be sure, but I think I might actually have just seen Mr. Mueller smile.”
  6. “Does Trump have a hotel in a country where we don’t have an extradition treaty?”
  7. “How many esses in narcissist?”
  8. “Can we be sure the President didn’t actually shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue?”
  9. “Christ, guys, isn’t there ANYTHING impeachable here?”
  10. “If we’re still doing this a year from now, I think I’ll go join a monastery somewhere.”
  11. “I hear Putin’s just a shill for Kim Jong-un.”
  12. “I already told you- NO, being a dick is not an impeachable offense!”
  13. “Too bad it’s not Hillary. This would take about 5 minutes and we’d all be home by now”

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
56429

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
56430

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is *on *the bed.)
56431

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. Patio furniture crashing into balcony railing when the wind picks up
56432

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is *on *the bed.)
  4. Patio furniture crashing into balcony railing when the wind picks up
  5. A child’s needing parental assistance
56433

Next up: Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
56434

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
56435

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
56436

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain :mad:
56437

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain
  9. Branches scratching the window in a high wind
56438

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain
  9. Branches scratching the window in a high wind
  10. Acid reflux. The worst way to wake up in the history of waking up.
56439

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain
  9. Branches scratching the window in a high wind
  10. Acid reflux. The worst way to wake up in the history of waking up.
  11. Hovering blimps
56440

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain
  9. Branches scratching the window in a high wind
  10. Acid reflux. The worst way to wake up in the history of waking up.
  11. Hovering blimps
  12. Snowplows with reverse-beepers clearing the street in front of your house
56441

Things that wake you up in the middle of the night

  1. Unexpected noises (things that go “bump”)
  2. A thunderstorm
  3. The all-too-familiar “rup-rup-rup” sound of a cat preparing to initiate Barf Sequence. (Especially true if said cat is on the bed.)
  4. A child’s needing parental assistance
  5. Having to go pee.
  6. A phone call from a telemarketer or stranger
  7. Some asshole’s car alarm
  8. Back pain
  9. Branches scratching the window in a high wind
  10. Acid reflux. The worst way to wake up in the history of waking up.
  11. Hovering blimps
  12. Snowplows with reverse-beepers clearing the street in front of your house
  13. Neighbors’ loud summer outdoor parties that can go until 3 am

Next:

New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
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New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
  2. I will restrict drinking only to days that end with “y”
56443

New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
  2. I will restrict drinking only to days that end with “y”
  3. I will not engage in photosynthesis
56444

New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
  2. I will restrict drinking only to days that end with “y”
  3. I will not engage in photosynthesis
  4. I will turn on one or more lights when it gets dark.
56445

New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
  2. I will restrict drinking only to days that end with “y”
  3. I will not engage in photosynthesis
  4. I will turn on one or more lights when it gets dark.
  5. I will drink at least 12 oz of water every day
56446

New Year’s resolutions that are a cinch to keep

  1. I will snuggle with my lovey-dovey pitbull at least once a day
  2. I will restrict drinking only to days that end with “y”
  3. I will not engage in photosynthesis
  4. I will turn on one or more lights when it gets dark.
  5. I will drink at least 12 oz of water every day
  6. I will not try to lose weight by eating less and exercising more