Bakers Dozen

Sampiro · March 19, 2012, 9:19pm

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt-isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”

Elendil_s_Heir · March 20, 2012, 3:22am

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::

Sampiro · March 20, 2012, 4:28am

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::
“Mrs. Santorum, I was just thinking of you the other day when Mitt and I were baptizing your dead grandparents!”

Elendil_s_Heir · March 20, 2012, 2:32pm

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::
“Mrs. Santorum, I was just thinking of you the other day when Mitt and I were baptizing your dead grandparents!”
“Mitt is actually a little envious. No one’s tried to create a sexual slang term from his name.”

Annie-Xmas · March 20, 2012, 7:58pm

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::
“Mrs. Santorum, I was just thinking of you the other day when Mitt and I were baptizing your dead grandparents!”
“Mitt is actually a little envious. No one’s tried to create a sexual slang term from his name.”
Ya know, Mormons aren’t real Christians.

Sampiro · March 20, 2012, 8:37pm

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::
“Mrs. Santorum, I was just thinking of you the other day when Mitt and I were baptizing your dead grandparents!”
“Mitt is actually a little envious. No one’s tried to create a sexual slang term from his name.”
Ya know, Mormons aren’t real Christians.
“Please just keep smiling and acting natural. Rick really is batshit crazy and I’m convinced he’s a being called The Master and I’m scared of him. I’m slipping a note into your purse, please get it to the Doctor, most British people will know how to reach him NO keep smiling and looking ahead…”

anyrose · March 20, 2012, 9:12pm

this one is for the Quantum Leap fans:

Things overheard backstage when Mrs. Romney and Mrs. Santorum chatted at the latest GOP debate

“I have to say, your husband is much better-looking in person.”
“Hubby bought me a Masterlock Chastity Belt - isn’t it nice and shiny?”
“Now, which Mrs. Gingrich has he dragged along tonight…?”
“Can I ask you a question…errr…do you douche?”
“At least this isn’t as awkward as trying to make small talk with Todd Palin.”
“I’m going to break through the wall of the Lincoln bedroom, and build our own private chapel. How about you?”
“Only five children? I can’t imagine the shame and the beatings that must have brought you.”
“Mitt said, if he wins, he just might marry you, too. Oh, that man of mine!” :: chuckle ::
“Mrs. Santorum, I was just thinking of you the other day when Mitt and I were baptizing your dead grandparents!”
“Mitt is actually a little envious. No one’s tried to create a sexual slang term from his name.”
Ya know, Mormons aren’t real Christians.
“Please just keep smiling and acting natural. Rick really is batshit crazy and I’m convinced he’s a being called The Master and I’m scared of him. I’m slipping a note into your purse, please get it to the Doctor, most British people will know how to reach him NO keep smiling and looking ahead…”
“Oh, boy.”

I’m out of ideas for now - someone else start the next one.

Annie-Xmas · March 20, 2012, 9:24pm