Bakers Dozen

Favorite lines from the Shrek movies (spin-off Puss in Boots also acceptable); please include the film name and characters

  1. “It talks!” “Yeah, it’s getting him to shut up that’s the problem!” --Fiona and Shrek, Shrek
  2. “No, no! Dead chick off the table!” (Shrek in Shrek; The dead chick is Snow White, whom the dwarves have placed on Shrek’s table in her glass coffin)
  3. “That’s right, fool! Now I’m a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  4. “Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.” Lord Faarquad, Shrek
  5. “…and tomorrow, I’m makin’ waffles!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  6. Shrek: “I can’t believe I’m going to be a father. How did this happen?”
    Puss in Boots: "Allow me to explain. When a man falls in love with a woman, he is overcome with powerful urges… " (From Shrek the 3rd)
  7. Our first bachelorette is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. She likes sushi and hot-tubbing any time. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters. Let’s hear it for Cinderella! - Magic Mirror, first movie
  8. “I’m sorry, but the role of annoying talking animal has already been taken!” --Donkey, re: Puss in Boots, Shrek 2
  9. “They say he only drinks whole milk!” - Puss, Puss in Boots
  10. “From henceforth, we’re all to be known as Team Alpha Super Awesome Cool Dynamite Wolf Squadron.” - Donkey, Shrek the Third
  11. “Oh, you can’t tell me you’re afraid of heights.” “No, I’m just a little uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!” --Shrek and Donkey, Shrek

Favorite lines from the Shrek movies (spin-off Puss in Boots also acceptable); please include the film name and characters

  1. “It talks!” “Yeah, it’s getting him to shut up that’s the problem!” --Fiona and Shrek, Shrek
  2. “No, no! Dead chick off the table!” (Shrek in Shrek; The dead chick is Snow White, whom the dwarves have placed on Shrek’s table in her glass coffin)
  3. “That’s right, fool! Now I’m a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  4. “Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.” Lord Faarquad, Shrek
  5. “…and tomorrow, I’m makin’ waffles!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  6. Shrek: “I can’t believe I’m going to be a father. How did this happen?”
    Puss in Boots: "Allow me to explain. When a man falls in love with a woman, he is overcome with powerful urges… " (From Shrek the 3rd)
  7. Our first bachelorette is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. She likes sushi and hot-tubbing any time. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters. Let’s hear it for Cinderella! - Magic Mirror, first movie
  8. “I’m sorry, but the role of annoying talking animal has already been taken!” --Donkey, re: Puss in Boots, Shrek 2
  9. “They say he only drinks whole milk!” - Puss, Puss in Boots
  10. “From henceforth, we’re all to be known as Team Alpha Super Awesome Cool Dynamite Wolf Squadron.” - Donkey, Shrek the Third
  11. “Oh, you can’t tell me you’re afraid of heights.” “No, I’m just a little uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!” --Shrek and Donkey, Shrek
  12. “Do the roar!” (repeated by obnoxious, gravel-voiced bratty kid in Shrek: Forever After)

Favorite lines from the Shrek movies (spin-off Puss in Boots also acceptable); please include the film name and characters

  1. “It talks!” “Yeah, it’s getting him to shut up that’s the problem!” --Fiona and Shrek, Shrek
  2. “No, no! Dead chick off the table!” (Shrek in Shrek; The dead chick is Snow White, whom the dwarves have placed on Shrek’s table in her glass coffin)
  3. “That’s right, fool! Now I’m a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  4. “Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.” Lord Faarquad, Shrek
  5. “…and tomorrow, I’m makin’ waffles!” (Donkey, Shrek)
  6. Shrek: “I can’t believe I’m going to be a father. How did this happen?”
    Puss in Boots: "Allow me to explain. When a man falls in love with a woman, he is overcome with powerful urges… " (From Shrek the 3rd)
  7. Our first bachelorette is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. She likes sushi and hot-tubbing any time. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters. Let’s hear it for Cinderella! - Magic Mirror, first movie
  8. “I’m sorry, but the role of annoying talking animal has already been taken!” --Donkey, re: Puss in Boots, Shrek 2
  9. “They say he only drinks whole milk!” - Puss, Puss in Boots
  10. “From henceforth, we’re all to be known as Team Alpha Super Awesome Cool Dynamite Wolf Squadron.” - Donkey, Shrek the Third
  11. “Oh, you can’t tell me you’re afraid of heights.” “No, I’m just a little uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!” --Shrek and Donkey, Shrek
  12. “Do the roar!” (repeated by obnoxious, gravel-voiced bratty kid in Shrek: Forever After)
  13. “Join the club. We got jackets.” - Shrek, Shrek 2

Next category:

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special
  9. Jesus vs Santa: The Final Battle

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special
  9. Sensei Mark’s Japan Studies Students Present “J-Pop America Fun Time Now Horiday Specialte-de”

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special
  9. Jesus vs Santa: The Final Battle
  10. The 3 Wise Men Meet Hercules

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special
  9. Jesus vs Santa: The Final Battle
  10. The 3 Wise Men Meet Hercules
  11. Fa-la-la-la Lady Gaga

What am I, chopped liver? (see post 13692)

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia
  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas
  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism
  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special
  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman
  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special
  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II
  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special
  9. Sensei Mark’s Japan Studies Students Present “J-Pop America Fun Time Now Horiday Specialte-de”
  10. Jesus vs Santa: The Final Battle
  11. The 3 Wise Men Meet Hercules
  12. Fa-la-la-la Lady Gaga

Holiday TV specials that must never, ever be made

  1. Mitt and Ann Romney’s Mormon Christmas Fantasia

  2. Reindeer Can’t Fly: A Skeptic Looks at Christmas

  3. Disney’s Christmas Without Commercialism

  4. The Andy Williams Zombie Christmas Special

  5. Lindsay Lohan Snorts Frosty the Snowman

  6. The Jeffrey Dahmer Zombie Christmas Special

  7. The Star Wars Christmas Special, Episode II

  8. The YMCA Presents: Jerry Sandusky’s Happy-Playtime Hour Christmas Special

  9. Sensei Mark’s Japan Studies Students Present “J-Pop America Fun Time Now Horiday Specialte-de”

  10. Jesus vs Santa: The Final Battle

  11. The 3 Wise Men Meet Hercules

  12. Fa-la-la-la Lady Gaga

  13. The Sammy Davis Jr. and Mohammed Ali White Christmas Special
    There Must be 13 Ways to Leave Your Lover

  14. Just fake your own death, Seth

There Must be 13 Ways to Leave Your Lover

  1. Just fake your own death, Seth
  2. Drive off in the Ram, Sam.

OFF-GAME:

Late addition to the Christmas Specials That Must Never, Ever Be Made:

“Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer”: A Very Special Christmas Episode of House, M.D.

ON-GAME:
There Must be 13 Ways to Leave Your Lover

  1. Just fake your own death, Seth
  2. Drive off in the Ram, Sam.
  3. Just move to France, Lance.
    (Are we doing actual song lyrics here or making up our own? :dubious: I’m a little confused.)

We’re making up our own. Stay away Paul Simon.

There Must be 13 Ways to Leave Your Lover

  1. Just fake your own death, Seth
  2. Drive off in the Ram, Sam.
  3. Just move to France, Lance.
  4. Ride out the Storm, Norm.