Bananas: the new target for thieves

I saw this sign in a shop window last night. It may be slightly tongue in cheek, but then again:

Such signs used to warn would-be thieves that there was no cash, or no cigarettes, on the premises. But apparently there’s been a banana-related crime wave (now there’s a phrase I didn’t think I’d ever write) since Cyclone Larry wiped out most of the Australian banana crop. Bananas, it appears, have become the luxury good of choice among discerning burglars and I’ve even seen the phrase “banana rustling” being used in newspaper articles.

Isn’t life odd?

The Monkey Ninjas have returned!!!

Please excuse me whilst I dash off: Doc Savage must be warned!!



“…after all, I’m paying you 50,000 bananas for this role!
…and all I’m getting is $500,000 <wink>.”

Amazement and respect for anyone who names the source for that reference.

It’s bound to be the very next phase!

Hahah, but why didn’t they grab the chance to have a sign saying “Yes, we have no bananas”? :slight_smile:
(Plenty of banans chéz Celyn. Munchy Munchy. Plenty bloody annoying fruit flies too, though.

Sounds Hudsuckerish. You know, for the kids.

A) Kirk Cameron uses bananas to argue for intelligent design.

B) Most of Australia’s bananas have been taken away.

I don’t know about you, but this seems to me pretty ironclad proof that:

C) God hates Australia.



<darts eyes under wide-brimmed fedora>

<whispers> “Hey! You!

<looks nervously; shuffles forward two steps from alley>

<whispers> “Hey!

<flings open trenchcoat>

Wanna buy a banana?

This reminds me of the police blotter section in the local newspaper a couple of weeks ago. There were two separate instances. In one, a couple of teenagers climbed through the window of a parked ice cream truck and removed a pair of shorts containing $900. In the other, a house burglar stole items including cash, jewelry, and a pair of shorts. I think it’s the same thief, disguising his real intended target (shorts) by pretending to be interested in money and jewelry. (Seriously, though, who leaves 900 bucks in a pair of shorts inside an ice cream truck?)

Cute Aussie checkout girl to male customer: “Are you really happy to see me, or are you trying to steal a banana?” :smiley:

And the male customer’s response: “I think you have a certain appeel.”

Cute Aussie checkout girl to male customer: “Are you really happy to see me, or are you trying to steal a banana?” :D[/qupte]

Google Ad is for Humor Writing Workshops. Think they’re trying to tell us something? :wink:

Yeah. That we should be making mucho bananas for our jokes. :smiley:

A couple of years ago at the Grand Central Farmers Market, an abrupt, humorless lady asked the barely-English-speaking owner of a fruit stand, “You have no bananas today?” to which she got the serious reply, “Yes, we have no bananas.”

I was the only one who laughed.

A Don Martin cartoon, wasn’t it? Something about gorillas? I have the book somewhere at home, but don’t remember the exact title off-hand…

Much respect out to MacSpon – yes, it was a Don Martin cartoon entitled Star Spangled Banana, about a gorilla making his way from the Broadway stage to an illustrious film career.
My brain retains crap like this, but I can’t remember crucial details from the tech meeting we had yesterday. Sigh…

When I was an infant in Spain many years ago gypsies broke into our house and stole my baby food and bananas, thats it nothing else. I knew right then it was the beginning of a massive crime wave, but no listened!
Finally, vindication!

Do I get to reuse my banana smuggler joke?