My girlfriend introduced me to these things – I’m an addict! I wash my hands like 10 times a day.
Juniper Breeze, Cotton Blossom, and my favorite: pre-foamy Grapefruit.
Is my heterosexuality in question here?
I hope not. I can’t get enough of the damn things.
The thing is, they work! All that grit they put in there really goes to work on the grime. It’s like froo-froo smelling Lava.
Do they exfoliate? Because you know, that’s gay for sure. Listen, cleanliness in relation to homosexuality is a slippery slope my friend. If you’re concerned it’s better to never wash.
(:P)
Nah, I wouldn’t worry about your heterosexuality. I can’t think of a straight chick who doesn’t like a clean guy. Hygiene is good. I’m not entirely sure about the scents you’re using, but it could always be worse, you could be sticking ladles up your butt. That would be really gay. 
I resemble that remark 