IF YOU DON’T WANT YOUR PRECIOUS BUTT TO TOUCH A PUBLIC TOILET SEAT, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THE NEXT PERSON WANTS TO
HANDLE THE SWEATY DAMP SEAT PROTECTOR YOU LEFT BEHIND?
I mean, speaking as someone who usually just wipes down the
seat and goes bareback, as it were, and never AFAIK having caught any sort of disease from a toilet seat, I find it far more disgusting to handle some one else’s used seat protector. I’ll just find a different stall or bathroom if
need be. But the disconnect between self interest and the public good is startling.
Oooh, what a bungle! That’s gonna cost some points. The one place he should have inserted the slang term for a body part, using one word of less than half the syllables he did use. The judges aren’t gonna look kindly on that - I really think it blows javaman’s chances for even a bronze in this event.
I’d ask you to elaborate, but then you’d realise what a perv I am. Suffice to say the image of your well-developed thigh muscles made MY day…
b.
Oh,crap, almost forgot about the OP!!!See how easily well developed thigh muscles can distract? Java, rest assured anyone who is anal (sic) enough to regularly use ass gaskets will eventually walk out of a toilet stall with half of one hanging out of his pants. It’s just justice. Look for it in a crapper near you. And keep a disposable camera handy for when it does.
There have been threads in this very Pit that blame the hovering type of women for some of the worst messes on toilet seats in women’s restrooms. Unfortunately I can’t remember a unique enough keyword to dig up the particular one I have in mind.
Not that I speak from experience, however. I’m built to pee standing up.
I also wipe down the seat and use an assgasket (which I always flush). My reason is I don’t want to sit on urine droplets because the last person had poor aim.
As bad as it is walking in and finding someone’s used protector still on the seat, I’d still rather experience that than coming in after some dolt forgot to flush the contents.
You know, if you leave the little tongue from the middle attached, it hangs in the water while you go. Then, when you flush, it goes down automatically. Why don’t other people know this. Even if you forget to flush, the next person only has to flush to get rid of your ass gasket.
Personally, though, I just sit. You can’t catch anything from a toliet seat, anyway
Apricot
Bless yer heart, Devil’s Grandmother, ya found the thread I was thinking of. Unfortunately your linking needs a little work, but I propose we work as a team on this one:
If your aim is anything like your spelling, you’d better stop hovering.
[sub]This has been Lesson 2 of 25 in How To Make Enemies Without Really Trying.[/sub]
heh. This kinda half reminds me of something I witnessed a few weeks ago.
I went to use the bathroom at Walmart. There was another woman walking in just in front of me. She takes two, uh, “assgaskets”, and walks towards the first stall, then quickly turns around and goes into the second. I go into the first and see that the bowl is a little rust-stained. It’s the only other open stall, so I use it, thinking, whatever, the lady’s probably just some kind of neat-freak; I don’t care, that’s her issue. I finish up before her, and I’m at one of the sinks washing my hands, when I see her come out of her stall, make eye contact with me in the mirror, then walk right out the door WITHOUT WASHING HER HANDS! What the everloving fuck?!? You need TWO dagblasted assgaskets and effin’ clean water to piss in, but then you don’t even wash your skanky hands?! Jesus horse-fucking Christ, lady, what is wrong with you?!? Did no one ever teach you basic hygiene? Where the fuck did you get the idea that you will break out in a pox and die if your precious ass darest touch the tiny bit of the seat, or that rust contains a bacteria that will magically leap into your cunt and infest you from the inside, but, hey, piss and/or shit all over you hands is A-OK? For Zeus’ sake, you disgusting whore, wash yer freakin’ hands!!!
::exhales:: Wow. It felt good to get that out. This is my first pit-rant; I had no idea how satisfying it could be… ::lights cigarette::
I wipe it down and look at it from different angles to make sure I got all signs of moisture up. Then I will get an assgasket from the back of the box, and flush with my foot. I’m not a big fan of public toilets.
Coolest thing I’d seen in a long time was at the O’Hare airport. As I approached the throne, I noticed that there was a large black box on the back of it. When I got up to it, I noticed that there was a plastic wrap type tube encasing the seat. Then, apparently like the flush sensor, it detected me and it automatically pulled the tube along the seat, leaving a fresh, sanitary seat covering for me to sit on. That’s right. A seat condom! When I got up, it did it again. That’s the only place I’d ever seen one of those things and wish they were in more places.
And yes. I made it do it a few more times, and then dragged my partner in there so he could see it, and he played with it too for about 5 minutes. Just about the neatest thing I’d ever seen.
