“If Batman is so fuckin’ smart, why does he wear his undies outside his suit?”
Here I sit
On the pooper
Giving birth
To a new State Trooper.
Ya know it would be so easy and I’m betting it would make the local news if we got a lot of people in on it. Good idea.
I don’t get it.
I think it was meant to say “The end is near”, but the author left out “the.” Someone tried to be smarmy and correct it, yet put the “the” in the wrong place.
It should have been:
The
^end is near.
Or… it could be that I don’t get it, either.
The true issue is that I failed to recall the piece correctly. It was worse. Note that in the original this was all written by the same person:
-------END
THE IS^NEAR
“Nixon Now!”
Writer 1: Don’t write on this wall
Writer 2: Don’t type on it either
Writer 1: I wanna fuck grils
Writer 2: it’s girls, not grils
Writer 3: What’s wrong with us grils?
Oscar Wilde was prematurely gay.
Sign in a downtown shop window, during the Nixon impeachment flurry:
“Dick Nixon before he dicks us”
Sign over a bar urinal:
“We aim to please
You aim too, please”
“John Is Gay”
a little below that, “He Is Not”
a little below that “I Am, Too!”
My all-time favorite is written directly on the seat of the toilet in the women’s room at a bar in Brooklyn. Around the top of the seat, there’s a drawing of the Revolutionary War navy flag snake, with the text:
“Don’t pee on me”
At my old university library, in all three women’s loos and with big black marker:
Bloody Hell.
Tampax Woman Strikes Again.
Next to a urinal with the logo of Crane Plumbing:
“You stand on one leg in the middle of a bog”
Please don’t throw cigarette butts in the urinals.
We don’t come to your house and piss in the ashtrays.
–The Janitors
Look Down - Your Future Is In Your Hands
Those who read the shithouse walls
roll their shit in little balls.
And those who read those words of wit,
EAT those little balls of shit!
Jesus Variation:
Jesus Saves
But Esposito scores on the rebound
There once was a man from Madras
Who’s balls were made out of brass
He’d bang them together
Amid stormy weather
And lightning shot out of his ass.
I spied the Doo be doo be doo and Nietche/God quotes in College