OK; let’s see how this gets answered . . .
When I was growing up, and later in the military, the idea was that drinking beer (or any alcoholic beverage) through a straw would get you drunk faster.
I’ve field tested this theory, and it seems to be true. 
Now, the real question: Can anyone tell me WHY this is true? Or, I suppose, tell me that it isn’t true, and why . . .
My theory has been this:
Alcohol is absorbed into the bloodstream through the lining of the stomach, as well as farther down the line.
Carbonation is known to increase the rate of absorption. Consider champagne versus straight whiskey. Whiskey packs one hell of a wallop, but if you drink it fast it’ll sneak up on you. With champagne, on the other hand, a glass or two will let you know what you’re getting into.
Drinking through a straw doesn’t allow the beer to fizz up as it would when sloshing it down your gullet through a bottle or can. So there’s more carbonation in the stomach, which pushes alcohol into the bloodstream faster than it normally would.
Goggles on, engage.
WAG for the body to absorb the alchohol the beer must be above a certain temperature.
By drinking in gulps this has the effect of keeping the beer too cool for this but when you use a straw it warms up before it hits the stomach, hence you get drunk sooner.
I thought it was because when you drink out of a straw you’re taking in less air than when you sip from the rim of the mug/bottle/can/trough.
This may be similar in theory to SofaKing’s theory. Something tells me I’ve read this somewhere. Air circulating around and through the alcohol doesn’t allow for absorption as rapid as straight through a straw, which creates a sort of vacuum.
Sofa King hit it right on the head.
Tried it with guinness and no difference. tried it with red dog=buzz from hell.
Guiness? Urg. Bought a six-pack of Guiness extra stout, and it lasted me for 6 months; like drinking liquid ear-wax. No wonder they call it ‘bitter’.
I suppose Sofa king’s theory would also make a difference when I drink beer from the can/bottle, and when I have a glassful and drink it straight, then . . . no wonder I like drinking from a mug better . . . .