being old is better because...?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Help, my google-fu has failed me. I am writing a card for a friend turning 55 today and I thought Id write up one of those “Top 10 reasons” type lists of why it is good to be fifty. Alas I cannot find any such thing online :frowning: .
So I ask the dopers, anyone have any links they might offer? Or maybe offer up some humorous suggestions? I’m looking for something fun.

Thanks.

(If this isn’t the right forum for this, I appologize. Wasn’t really sure.)

2

#10. Like a violin ~ we ge tmore harmonious with age!

3

#9. You only remember the good things about the stupid things you did in your 20s.

Ahunter3, who has 3 years to go, assuming he correctly recalls how old he is

4
  1. You are actually interested in those dinner party conversations about colonoscopies and lawn care.
5
  1. You can use the ever growing list of aches and pains as reasons to get your children / grandchildren to do things for you. (I’m only 28, but I’ve already got a small list of aches and pains I didn’t have just 5 years ago, so I figure by the time I’m 55 I’ll probably be an invalid.)
6
  1. You don’t have to give a damn where the kids are anymore.
7
  1. It means you weren’t dead by 49.
8

Hope these help:

  • your mortgage is nearly paid off

  • you can ogle young women safely

  • you have lots of memories and experience

  • you can say “when I was a boy, we did things this way…”

  • you can fart without an adult telling you off :eek:

9

My lawn looks like crap.

There, that covers both.

Yeah, I know I got nothing here. I blame that it’s Sunday and I’m on brain hiatus.

10

Car insurance is cheaper than when you were a teen.

11

No worries about menstruation OR pregnancy. No cramps. No “feminine supplies” when you travel. You can copulate like a rabbit any day, any time, and if it’s a long-term monogamous relationship, don’t ever have to be concerned with any BC or anti-STD device at all.

There are more and more things all the time that you can do without even thinking about them because you’ve done them so often.

12

You’ve watched enough TV to know that suicide is not the answer. You have to fake a fatal boat accident and live off the insurance. Just hope Columbo is out of town :wink:

13

You get groovy AARP discounts and you, like fine wine, get better with age!

14

I have no idea. I was hoping you could tell me. I hate getting old.

Colonoscopies and lawn care?

[sub]hangs her head and cries[/sub]

15

You can be a lot more relaxed about the deficit, the environment, and peak oil.

16

Oh yeah, just shove it off on us younger folk.

Well, let me tell you! I’m getting up there too! I won’t be shoved off on any more!

:: waves 300-baud acoustic-coupler moden in air ::

Whippersnappers with their ‘high-speed’ internet connections! In my day, we didn’t have high-speed! We had to connect over the phone! And it was dial-tone both ways!

17

Uphill, no less! And we liked it!

18

Golden Girls v. Gilmore Girls: who’s still on TV 30 times a day?