Doesn’t reallly matter what the point was if it was based on a lie. “I can hardly feel 8 inches” is absolutely not the same as “I had 8 inches and it was great.” I don’t really care who had 8 inches of what, but I’m surprised nobody has the integrity to admit that Guinistasia baldly fabricated that statement. Surely you can enjoy a nice dogpile upon nyctea scandiaca without resorting to lying.
From everything I’ve seen, this may be a national sport.
Cock cock cock, as much as she likes!
If you make bad decisions and your family has plenty of money, you’re a lot less likely to end up working poor than if you make bad decisions and your family is of modest means. A rich man’s son who gets caught with dope is a lot less likely to do time than a poor man’s son who gets caught with dope. If you’re Steven Spielberg’s mistress and you get pregnant, the outcome is lot more likely to be gratifying than if your boy friend is an assistant manager at Wal-Mart. If you know the family can always spare enough money to get you through, impulsively quitting a job where the supervisor is treating you like a beast of burden just doesn’t have the same dire consequences as when your old man is living on disability after a workplace accident.
In other words, if you or your family have $$$ and you screw up, you’ve got a lot more room to recover. One of the biggest screw-ups in my high school had a family that hit it big in real estate, and he made just about every major mistake you can think of–drugs and alcoholism, a string of bad marriages, impulsive violence–about the only mistake he didn’t make was dropping out of school. His family bailed him out every time, following him around cleaning up his messes, and today he makes big bucks in his family company where, I’m told, he does nothing but drink and sexually harass the temps (they’ve already settled a couple of law suits on that).
It’s all well and good to tell people they shouldn’t have made bad decisions, but you have to remember that many people make bad decisions because they’re desperate or in pain and not thinking straight because of it. One woman I knew married the first guy who would have her because she was desperate to escape a family where she was being emotionally and sometimes physically abused. She ended up in an even worse situation. She didn’t get on an even keel until she was in her late thirties and only with a lot of help from friends and charitable institutions.
Many people get a raw deal from life. Please think about that the next time you’re tempted to go “Tut, tut! You should have made better decisions!”
Maybe somebody else has already made this point, but I didn’t have the patience to read all the way to the end of the thread before replying.
I’m sorry you’ve had a bad run lately, inkleberry.
Family planning is a fairly modern thing. I’m so happy that nature frequently has its way of being unpredictable. If our parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents and ancestors beyond that had been all about “family planning”, most of us wouldn’t be here.
I was an accident. My mother conceived my twin and me while taking thePill. They had planned for our older siblings (one who they adopted). But whoops! Twins! And while my parents could afford to feed all of us, that was about it!
I don’t think humanity would have been harmed if my mother had decided to abort us. Nor do I think my mother would have been forever traumatized. But I’m glad my parents decided to let the chips fall where they may, without trying to “plan” every iota of their lives. Sometimes you can plan yourself right out of good, unforeseeable things.
No one should be surprised when life gets rough. No one, not even the purposefully childless like myself. Every time I think I can relax and live a stress-free life, reality slaps me upside the head. You can talk about choices all day long, but sometimes the “bad” choices we make do not become apparent until AFTER THE FACT. If I get fired from my job tomorrow (lord please don’t let that happen!), then AFTER THE FACT it would appear that my moving to Miami was a bad decision. But what would be the point in pointing this out to me, when to any reasonable person, taking a new job in the absence of other opportunities would be a perfectly good decision?
The only bad decision inkleberry has made that’s apparent to me was that she allowed herself to be born into this universe, where bad things happen to good people FOR NO REASON. The bible is a wacky book, but the Book of Job has lessons in it for all of us.
Thanks for the info, Caricci. I had never heard of this program before. Having lived in two states with TDI, what’s your take on it? From your link, I see that the program (at least in RI) is paid for entirely by the employee, through a 1.5% withholding rate on the first $46,800 in earnings. So it’s another tax, on top of income tax, FICA, Medicare, etc., and for a benefit that I don’t think very many people would actually be able to use over the course of a career. My parents recently retired, and as far as I can remember, they each only had one hospitalization/surgery that kept them out of work for more than the minimum 7 days, and that was over the course of 40 years.
The other thing I wonder about is the fact that TDI benefits are paid even if you are being paid salary/sick/vacation pay by your employer, which seems strange. I see that the benefit is paid at a rate of 4.62% of your quarterly earnings, per week. 4.62% X 13 weeks = 60% of your quarterly earnings, which is I gather is a pretty common amount for disablity insurance. My company pays 75% of salary for the first 90 days (short term disability) and 60% beyond 90 days (long term disability). It seems if I lived in RI, I could claim TDI, and get either 135% or 120% of my salary in total payments. While I’m sure that someone who is disabled can use the help, I think paying people more when they are not working than if they were, would open up the potential for a great deal of abuse. Maybe that’s not the case in IRL, I dunno.
Now that I have read the rest of the thread, all I’ve got to say is:
Nyctea, fuck you.
You remind of the scumbags who swarm on to a battle field after the fighting is over to shoot the wounded. It’s going to be very hard to get happy again after being reminded yet again that peope like you actually exist.
Fuck you. In the nastiest, most degrading, demeaning and painful way possible, fuck you.
I do my little devil dance. Ha ha ha!
sigh
My husband gloats. I hang my head in accusatory shame.
I still get about an email a week from that train wreck. Me and my waffles, they start wars.
On the bright side, maybe she’ll wait too long for the economically and scientifically and unselfishly correct time to conceive, and end up not being able to. I think for her to NOT be able to continue her line would be lovely.
If you’re talking about reason and logic, no, but on an emotional level many women DO find such comments threatening and react much as any female mammal does when she feels her offspring is threatened. Not universally, no, but it’s common enough. It’s not rational because parental love isn’t rational. I was talking about emotional reactions, sorry if that wasn’t clear.
Oh puh-leeeeeze. I lived in Hayward for a couple of years and now live in Oakland.
Believe me - Hayward is nothing like Oakland. Hayward bites the big choda.
Oakland is a fab city! Mayor Jerry Moonbeam Brown totaly ROX!
Mmmmm…waffles…
My husband ate all of the waffles. I have none left.
To steal a line from you, that fills me with grrr. He could’ve left me one waffle.
(And your ‘OMG waffle at 3 months!’ was mentioned on another board I frequent - I laughed.)
E.
We have waffles! We will share! You must send a link to that site/thread. Must must must.
Anyone thinking of the waffle song from MST3K? (It’s forbidden to post lyrics here, unfortunately).
Yeah, you’re right - maybe I should just reproduce like rabbits now, even if I’m not ready, just in case of the small chance I can’t later! Great idea! Who cares if I have to struggle and live in a crappy place and quit my job and be on welfare and get public assistance! As long as I’ve prolonged my genetic line, who cares if they have to grow up poor! Good idea Hama… how’s it working out for you?
And hey, if I couldn’t concieve, there are plenty of unwanted children out there to adopt. So your whole little snide comment is moot! Being able to get fucked, have sperm meet your egg and implant in your uterus isn’t the end-all, be-all of womanhood.
nyctea, you have sooooo blown everyone’s comments out of proportion!
You ARE being a shallow cunt in this thread (how you are in real life I have no clue) and an insensitive bitch. NO ONE is suggesting you fuck like a bunny and pop out kids - what we ARE suggesting is that you shut the fuck up about the choices other people have made.
Have kids, don’t have kids, whatever… just stop being so goddamned judgemental about other people. YOU may have a charmed life, the rest of us don’t. You focused right down on the child while totally ignoring everything else that was going wrong in inkleberry’s life that would have gone wrong whether or not she had a kid. In other words, the baby isn’t to blame here. Or at least not wholly, and certainly not responsible in any way, being a baby.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much - nyctea, if the abortion was really such a no-big-deal you won’t be so damned defensive about it.
- Yeah, you’re right - maybe I should just reproduce like rabbits now, even if I’m not ready, just in case of the small chance I can’t later!
Didn’t say that. I expressed the hope that you don’t reproduce AT ALL.
- Who cares if I have to struggle and live in a crappy place and quit my job and be on welfare and get public assistance!
Yes. Because that’s exactly what everyone said you should do. Especially me. :rolleyes:
- As long as I’ve prolonged my genetic line, who cares if they have to grow up poor! Good idea Hama… how’s it working out for you?
I didn’t grow up poor and my kids aren’t growing up poor, so I’m not sure what you’re talking about.
- And hey, if I couldn’t concieve, there are plenty of unwanted children out there to adopt.
Please do - and take your adopted kids to a clinic where anti-choice people are protesting and ask them how many kids THEY’VE adopted? That would rule.
- So your whole little snide comment is moot!
No, because you won’t be passing along your genetic material…which is what I meant by “continue her line.” And according to dictionary.com, the first definition of the adjective form of moot is:
“1. Subject to debate; arguable: a moot question.”
I don’t think we need to argue about it, though.
- Being able to get fucked, have sperm meet your egg and implant in your uterus isn’t the end-all, be-all of womanhood.
Never said it was, Angel-Tits. Your ferocious and zealotry in your posts about how fantastic your life are and how unselfish you are and how a cell meeting a cell is no big deal - repeatedly - lead me to think you may not be as casual about your choices as you say. Or, alternatively, that you really DO care more about the opinions people have of you on this message board than you let on.
the bolded bit is quite the value judgement, no?
So, poor folks shouldn’t reproduce? Hmm…I’m trying to figure out what political party you would belong to–the Dems are pro-choice, but the Reps hate the poor.
Where do you come in? Or should we just cull all those who don’t fit your definition of “supporting children in the best possible way”?
And what is that way? Is there a cut off as to income? Say, anything under
$30,000/year disqualify you for parenthood? Or would it be place of residence–anyone who lives on the “wrong side of town” must be sterilized?
Or is that discounted and the basic requirement is say country club membership?
Do tell, I am so interested in finding out if I should have had my kids at all–please, O Knowing One–guide my life and all it’s choices.
One is perfectly capable of “finishing college” or anything else while pregnant and/or caring for children. I did it. Lots of women do it. Why couldn’t you? Wimp? Weak? Not enough energy or knowhow? Shame on you for killing what was YOUR mistake, it’s so “simple”. It’s not the unborn baby’s fault that you weren’t good enough or strong enough. (I don’t mean that, but THAT is the same sort of attitude that you’re giving those who do choose to carry their babies to full term and keep them).
I finished my last semester while sick as can be with morning sickness and caring for a sullen pre-teen daughter, the demands of a household, working four part time jobs AND carrying a full credit load. It was simple, just forego sleep, real food, and any normal life. And yeah, I have a great career (though it’s not really in what I went to college for, but a sideways seque’ 'nother story anyway) and all and STILL kept the baby.
Our point was not that YOU couldn’t do it, but that it was pretty arrogant of you to decide FOR others what they should or should not do in their situations. OR that their pregnancy or lack thereof has anything to do with possible reversal of fortunes, which can happen whether childED or childless.
Did you even read her OP or subsequent posts? The neighborhood wasn’t the way she’s complaining about now when they first moved in.
Her husband losing his job was hardly the result of the pregnancy. And NO ONE can predict how a pregnancy will go, had she had a normal pregnancy she would have been able to work through it (hardy like a draft horse, the way my pregnancies went).
Pregnancy or no, things happen in life (like reversal of fortunes) that people have NO CONTROL OVER. And they have every right to be unhappy about, and complain about those circumstances.
Whether she has a child or not really has only the smallest bearing on this sort of situation. She very well could be a person with NO child who spent a year with a serious illness and whose husband lost his job and due to those be now struggling in a bad neighborhood to regain their footing.
You obviously have NOT had to face such a situation in life, otherwise you wouldn’t be filled with such smug arrogance about how others “should” run their lives.
:eek: 
Well, with that as your guidepost in life, I’m not surprised that you have smugly decided for people what they should or should not do regarding reproduction.
But for you to decide that for your “most important decisions” and to have smugly decided that NO emotion decision making is the way to the best income of an emotionally good life (happiness= emotion).
Wow…
Where did she say it was society’s fault?