Best Chick Tract ever

I came across this Chick tract over at BBSpot. I still have the giggles.

I thought that Chick had that one suppressed. Good to see that it’s back on the net somewheres.

Booo I thought this was going to be an actual chick track. I love those things. No one ever got back to me about the rumor you can order about 10 thousand for free if you promise to hand them out. I WANT THEM.

10,000 of them cost $750.00, if you order 10,000 of the same one. They say this is 50% of the list price of them individually. What they do for free with that is do a custom design on the back. It seems typically that will be a church or organization name, address phone and the like.

In honor of Halloween - er, I mean, the Devil’s Birthday - here are some Halloween-themed Chick tracts:


The Devil’s Night

Happy Halloween

The Little Princess

The Trick

Happy Halloween, fellow heathens!

Satan used “Haw Haw!” I love it!

That reminds me, I have to go and place my special incantations needed to place curses on the treats to influence children! Thanks FD!

LOL, my daughter likes to do montages – one of her favourite things to use are the chick tracts she finds at Wal-Mart – we always have to go down the beer aisle for her to grab one (or 5) when we go there. I am so glad her printer is out of ink, or she would be printing them out!

Don’t forget to have your human sacrifices ready for when I come by later. I’ve got a schedule to keep.

It wasn’t my turn to get the virgins was it? Cause if it was I totally forgot. Maybe a quick stop at virgins4sacrificeRus is in order.

I’m tempted to order “This tract sponsored by Atheists for Jesus”. :slight_smile:

Or even better by “Gotcha Ya Inc”

I had completely forgotten to do that myself! Boy, I would have been so embarrassed November 1st if I’d failed to damn the souls of all the neighborhood kids.

You’d be embarrassed? We’d have to set your robe on fire, how do you think we’d feel? :frowning:

Geez, you guys aren’t ready, yet? I’ve got my pentagram all set up and ready to go, my robe is dry cleaned, and I have several cats and dogs on order for the sacrifice. Get it together, wouldja?

The only problem I have is that I keep mixing up my bowl of candy with the bowl of candy that has the pins and glass in it.

I’m already upset that I forgot to gather virgins. I’ll just be glad when the whole thing is over and I can relax on the couch with a nice mug of goats blood.

:smack: goats!


I was wondering why this thread wasn’t in the Pit. I thought I was witnessing a shocking breach of SDMB tradition.

Everyone calm down – we’ve got the virgins – duh, who do you think those 15 year olds trick-or-treating are? Hello, if they were having sex, they’d be doing that instead of begging for candy! Goats are also well-stocked. And shamrock227 – you get your robe dry-celaned??? I took mine in once and they called the flippin’ cops on me! Boy, that was almost a problem…

Yeah, almost. Thankfully we had the curvy knife squad on hand to, ahem, dispatch the issue.

Everyone get a good nights rest tonight too. Don’t want to see another drowsy sabbath ok?