Some coworkers and I ate at a Cracker Barrel for lunch yesterday, giving me the opportunity to perform this line to perfection. No one else found it as funny as I did.
When Marge joins the police academy, apart from the classic lines from the main story:
(After the shooting test with the popup targets)
Wiggum: “You missed the baby… You missed the Blind Man…”
But the side one to do with selling of fake jeans over a poker game, and a minor moment of real Moe on what he calls a “Garage”… A Carhole…
“I’d like the phone book for Hokkaido, Japan please”
“OK, here you go.”
“May I use your telephone, please?”
“Is it a local call?”
“Welll…er…um…Yes.”
Another favorite phone-related gag is from when Bart is dialing random numbers in the Southern Hemisphere in an effort to find someone who can say their toilet flushes clockwise (“Bart vs. Australia”). When he rings up Buenos Aires, an elderly Hitler is seen trying to get back to his car to answer his cellphone, only to miss the call.
Hitler: “Ach! Das Wagen-phone ist ein…Nuisance-phone!” Then when another elderly ex-Nazi going by on a bicycle rings his bell and says, “Buenas noches, mein Führer!”, he returns a half-hearted, “Ja, ja…”.
I liked when Homer and the others are Civil War reenactors. Apu, uniformed as Robert E. Lee, says, in his characteristic singsong, “The South will come again!”
(singing) “I got Krusty in hot water. Now I’ll have to bail him out.”
“How come I don’t get a song? Mom gets a song!”
“With the economy the way it is you’re lucky to get soup.”
And I liked it when Principal Skinner had a snit fit over all the historical inaccuracies in the uniforms and equipment. Right before the World War 2 vets entered the fray, and Professor Frink showed up in an enormous mechanical spider à la Wild Wild West.
Man, if that was how “historical reenactment” always ended up, I’d so be into it!